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I have a theory.
I reckon you can tell a lot about the culture of a particular country
by looking at its political campaign ads.
See what you think.
The other guy wants you to believe he is nice.
But in fact, he isn’t.
He says he wants to lower taxes,
but in reality he wants to raise them.
He says he wants to protect jobs,
but in fact he wants to put everyone out of work.
He says he’s not a terrorist.
But the truth is he has a secret base in the mountains,
equipped with nuclear missiles
and a fluffy white cat.
And he has bad breath.
Don’t vote for the other guy.
He’s a nutcase.
I’m rewboss, and I approve this message.
Are you sick of the government?
Are your wages just a little bit too low?
Do you think that schools could do better?
Well, now is the t... Now is the time to take action,
and vote for us because we have all the answers.
We will raise the standard of living
and cut taxes at the same time.
And we will use our magic pixie dust
to solve the problems in the economy and build lots of shiny new hospitals.
And if we can’t work out how to do all that, then we will blame Europe.
So vote for rewboss, the pixie-dust party.
Beautiful scenery.
Music that is simultaneously relaxing
and stirring.
Random phrases.
Coffee and cake.
Attempting to be patriotic
but not nationalistic.
You are all lovely people.
No really: you are.
Finally, a phrase containing the word:
“together”.
Vote for the party that makes you feel good.
Vote rewboss.