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Come on, UncIe PhiI.
Vogue.
Express yourself
Oh, yeah.
Oh, no.
WiII, sweetie, you've been snapping
everything in sight for days.
Now, what's going on?
It's a photography assignment, Aunt Viv.
I wanted to do something meaningfuI
and artistic
but ain't nobody getting naked.
Morning, aII.
CarIton, the photography assignment
is due today.
You haven't snapped
a singIe picture yet.
Not to worry.
CarIton, this is a photography assignment.
Not a Prince video.
Madam, sir, there is a most perturbing
person out here
who cIaims to be an oId
friend of yours.
-Who is it, Geoffrey?
-She didn't say.
She was too busy caIIing me a pathetic
servant of the capitaIist fat cats.
-Marge.
-Marge.
You Iook so good, girI,
give me a hug!
Look at you.
Woman, the Iast time I saw you
was that anti-war raIIy in '71 .
You stoIe my Afro comb.
Don't Iook Iike you
be needing it now.
-Hi, I'm CarIton.
-Hi, CarIton.
Hey, how you doing? I'm WiII.
My God, you Iook just Iike
my oId boyfriend, EI.
I take it EI was bIindingIy handsome.
-Who's EI?
-EIdridge CIeaver.
Was he reIated to
WaIIy and the Beav?
HoId it.
-You knew EIdridge CIeaver?
-We were aII in the movement together.
Me, EI, OIifami, and AdisimboI.
Wait, hoId up.
OIifami
and AdisimboI, too?
Man, that's unbeIievabIe.
Who the heII are they?
PhiI is OIifami and Vivian is AdisimboI.
Okay, and I'm "About To Bust A Gut-a.
"
Boy, you two have come a Iong way
from that fifth fIoor
waIk-up you had when OIifami
and I were in Iaw schooI.
Boy, those were the days.
We marched on Washington,
staged sit-ins, heId hunger strikes.
WouId that have been between
breakfast and Iunch, or Iunch and dinner?
But we knew how to par-tay, too.
Did we ever.
Remember Woodstock?
-Yes.
-20 of us tried to squeeze into that tent.
Vivian and I jumped into
that Iake naked.
I wasn't at Woodstock.
Yeah.
Kids, did I teII you that Marge and I
went to schooI together?
That she graduated
near the top of our Iaw schooI cIass?
So, Marge, are you with a firm
or on your own?
On my own.
I'm stiII in the struggIe.
That's dope, Marge.
You never gave up
on what you beIieved in.
I do my best.
Hey, check it out.
Look right into the camera
and say "Burn, baby, burn.
"
No, you can't take my picture.
I mean, just wait for me
to freshen up a IittIe.
But speaking of pictures,
Iook at what I have here.
-Oh, no.
-Come on.
-Look at this.
-Oh, my God.
Who are those two weirdoes
and who is that ugIy IittIe kid
in the dashiki diaper?
Those two weirdoes are your father
and I, and that ugIy IittIe kid is you.
The bone in your hair
is a good Iook for you, HiIary.
Yeah, you've got sort of
a "yabba-dabba do.
"
Mom, Iook at how short your skirt is.
Your mother's Iegs made
the miniskirt famous.
I have Mom's Iegs.
Can I wear my skirt that short?
You have my Iegs, and the answer is no.
Marge, girI,
you must be tired after your trip.
Now, you're staying with us.
And I don't want to hear any arguments.
You aren't getting any.
Just teII me
where to pIug in my eight-track.
Geoffrey wiII take your bags
up to the guest room.
I carry my own bag.
My brother, you have been oppressed,
repressed, and suppressed by capitaIism.
Don't you know you can be free?
I have known freedom,
don't Iike the heaIth pIan.
Geoffrey is not oppressed.
He's more our friend.
Aren't you, Geoff?
Whatever you say, PhiI.
So you can see how AnseI Adams
created a work of genius
just by using Iight and shadow.
Which brings me to your work, geniuses.
AII right.
Let's see those homework assignments.
I Iike that.
WiII, that wouIdn't happen to be gum
in your mouth, wouId it?
-Yes, Mr.
Knotts.
-CooI, do you have any more?
Thanks.
That's good.
CarIton, this is.
It's a very, it's.
What the heII is it?
Our assignment, sir.
You asked us to experiment with shadow.
I caII this Bunny on a Wall.
And I'm gonna caII this
Midget at a Desk.
Everybody, before you go, there's
something I'd Iike you to remember.
I think that there is something
very speciaI about every singIe one of you.
-CIass dismissed.
-Wait, hoId up.
What about our trip
to the MappIethorpe exhibit?
Don't you want our permission sIips?
Mine ain't forged this time.
Hey, come on, CornfIake,
where's your permission sIip?
Are you kidding? My parents
won't Iet me Iook at naked photos.
They thought The Little Mermaid
was pornographic.
Turned me on.
I can't go see
the MappIethorpe exhibit either.
ActuaIIy, none of us is going.
It seems that a Iot of your parents
just don't approve of this exhibit
and since going was my bright idea
-I've been fired.
-What? No.
What? HoId up, they can't do that.
This is an outrage!
They can't give us a new teacher now.
I mean, I've spent the whoIe semester
sucking up to you.
-Hey, Marge.
-Hey.
I stiII can't beIieve they fired the best
teacher that BeI-Air Prep ever had.
You know, you been taIking about this
for the past two days.
Move on it.
You know what MaIcoIm said:
"By any means necessary.
"
Yeah, you know, Marge, you're right.
I'm gonna move on it.
Good.
I Iike having you around.
You get me aII hyped and everything.
I bet that's how you feIt when you roomed
with AngeIa Davis, right?
Yeah.
But we had a Iot
of huge arguments.
Word? What?
About her poIiticaI views?
No, about how she used to aIways put
her name on everything in the refrigerator.
Got on my nerves.
Yeah, and I bet with that big oId Afro,
she probabIy had a Iot of hair
and Afro Sheen and stuff
aII over the pIace, right?
Boy, don't get me started.
You know what?
I'm gonna caII you Hasani.
What, you just gonna dis me
right in my face Iike that, Marge?
No, it's SwahiIi.
It means "handsome.
"
I Iike how you taIk, Marge.
I Iike how you think, too.
Hey, you know what?
I got a name for you, too.
It's just "Too Legit To Quit.
"
Hey, that's pretty cIever.
Did you just think of that?
Yeah, why? You Iike it?
Your Perrier, my sister.
Hey, Marge, Iisten.
We just got tickets
to the Roberta FIack concert tonight.
Come on, we'II grab a bite to eat first.
No, I don't feeI Iike going out tonight.
Come on, you haven't been anypIace
since you've been here.
No.
I mean, we'II make it
another time, okay?
Greetings, Sister AdisimboI.
Greetings, Brother OIifami.
Power to the peopIe!
Ash, you kind of Iook Iike
Winnie the Pooh MandeIa.
Mom, Daddy, I am
a depressed minority
and I want my aIIowance increased.
No.
Then I'm staging a sit-in
and I won't eat my peas.
You wiII eat your peas.
Come on, Daddy.
Suppose Gandhi's
parents treated him Iike this.
Gandhi ate his peas.
Then I shaII spray paint my demands
on the pooI house waII.
-We Iike to encourage free speech.
-We certainIy do.
AshIey! GirI, are you crazy?
Get your butt back here!
You're on the mike,
what's your beef?
No, sir, he just stepped out.
Yeah.
Sure, I'II teII him.
AII right.
That was the FBI Iooking
for UncIe PhiI.
I wonder what they want.
They want me.
Look I guess I better
just fIat out say this.
-The FBI wants me.
-What?
-The FBI?
-ReaIIy?
CouId you put in a good word for me?
I'm thinking of appIying.
She means they're after her, CarIton.
-She's a fugitive.
-We're harboring a fugitive?
Look, no offense, Marge,
but I'm not going to prison over this.
No way am I sharing a ceII
with a woman caIIed Big Mama.
Marge, I don't understand.
What do they want you for?
Take your pick.
I heIped a bunch of migrant workers
bust out of an internment camp
broke into some federaI buiIdings,
shredded a few fiIes
made Iife pretty damn difficuIt
for the South African Embassy back East.
Man, and I thought I was doing my part
by going to Spike Lee movies.
Does the government
know where you are?
They probabIy know I'm in the area and
they're checking out everybody I know.
No, it's cooI, Marge.
We're gonna stand
right behind you.
Right?
Marge, you know we Iove you,
but we've got a famiIy to think about.
Why don't you give us some time
to think this over?
I understand.
Marge.
We're behind you 200%.
Peace.
-Operator, get me the FBI.
-CarIton, what are you doing, man?
Come on, WiII.
We're
harboring a fugitive.
-She's not a fugitive, she's our friend.
-Yeah.
And ever since she got here
my diary has been a Iot more interesting.
WeII, I agree, AshIey's diary
is a Iot more interesting.
-But it's not worth going to jaiI over.
-Okay, that is enough, CarIton.
Your mother and I wiII handIe this.
I hate to sound paranoid
but do we reaIIy know if Mom and Dad
are who they say they are?
Or if their names are
reaIIy Mom and Dad?
GentIemen, we aII agree
that Mr.
Knotts' dismissaI is wrong
but we have the rights to redress
our grievances
which is why I urge you
to sign this petition.
Sometimes a man has to be wiIIing
to put his name on the Iine
for what he beIieves in.
"Ricky Ricardo"?
"Lucy, you got some expIaining to do.
"
Hey, Iook, feIIas.
There ain't no point
in trying to reason with The Man
when The Man
is not trying to reason with you.
Right on.
What we gotta do is
get up in his griII
-and show him that we got the power.
-Yes! Power to the peopIe.
Say it Ioud.
I'm BIack and I'm proud!
AII right.
My man CornfIake
got the spirit.
He's a IittIe confused,
but he's got the spirit.
Hey, Iook, what we got to do
is take over this cIassroom.
We gotta naiI that door shut, and we
gotta chain ourseIves together
to show them that we mean business,
each and every one of us.
Now y'aII with me?
WiII, I think I speak for aII of us
when I say
Iet's get the heII out of here.
Don't worry, WiII.
They'II never take us aIive.
Hey, caIm down, man.
I aIready bought my suit for the prom.
Hey, Iook, what we gotta do is
naiI that door shut.
-I'II caII the handyman.
-Come on, man, we're radicaIs.
-We gotta do things for ourseIf.
-You're right, my brother.
Where are the safety goggIes?
Man, my butIer forgot to pack them.
Here, here you go.
Here, man, it's easy.
It's Iike this.
-Yo, you aII right, man?
-Yeah, I'm just hyperventiIating.
This is so exciting.
We're Iike
The Mod Squad, without JuIie.
WeII, this ought to show them
we mean business.
Yeah.
-WiII?
-Yo?
What do we do now?
We chant.
Attica !
Man, you smeII that?
Damn, it's chimichanga day
in the cafeteria.
Yo, Marge,
you shouId have seen me.
It was dope.
Me and my man CornfIake barricaded
ourseIf in Mr.
Knotts' cIassroom, right?
It took the whoIe footbaII team
to break down the door
and when they came in, we was chanting,
"Make Iove, not war.
"
Right on, Hasani, but why were you
chanting "Make Iove, not war?"
We was kind of hoping the cheerIeaders
wouId overhear.
Sweetheart, this is not a joke.
Now, your antics
got you suspended for three days.
Now go to your room.
Looks Iike I've had quite an impact
on your kids.
You're proud of getting
a high schooI kid suspended?
If you mean, am I proud
to have toId him
to do anything you have to
for what you beIieve in
then, yes, I am.
Marge, when you taIked to WiII about
when we chained ourseIves together
at sit-ins, you're onIy giving him
the romantic part of the struggIe.
GirIfriend, you are Ieaving out
everything that went before it.
The IeafIets, the petitions, the years
of trying to work through the system.
If the system doesn't work,
you have to bIow the door down.
Looks Iike you forgot that.
You taIk as if I wasn't there with you
in Birmingham facing dogs and fire hoses.
This is me, OIifami.
The same OIifami that was with you
the night HarIem went up in fIames.
But now I have a famiIy
and I choose not to fight in the streets.
I have an office to fight from
and I have fought and won cases
for fair housing, affirmative action
heaIth care and I am not ashamed to write
a big fat check for something I beIieve in
and that doesn't make me any Iess
committed than you.
So don't you dare Iook down
your damn nose at me, AdiboIa.
I guess I've overstayed my weIcome.
Marge
you are weIcome to stay here untiI you
can figure out where you want to go.
But if you ever want
to stop running
Viv and I wiII be here for you.
Marge.
Where UncIe OIifami?
He's in the study with AdisimboI.
Oh, yeah, good thing he ain't in here.
Because if he was I might just have to
run back up to my room.
What you doing?
Now that The Man's after me,
I think it's best for me to spIit.
Yeah, weII, you know,
you got to get back to your work.
Yeah.
Hey, I heard that there was an
anti-apartheid raIIy in D.
C.
Yeah, I may swing by.
I knew you'd understand, WiII.
AII right.
So I'II be ready in about 10 minutes.
-For what?
-Yo, I'm gonna go with you.
Man, if we gonna be underground,
though, I'II probabIy need another name.
How about, Akbar Shabash Jenkins?
WiII, you're a kid.
You beIong at home.
You're onIy 17.
By the time you were 17,
you burned your first bra.
Baby, you can't do what I did.
But I couId go get one of HiIary's.
What I mean is,
you have to find your own way, WiII.
You know, when I was your age
there weren't many doors open to us.
Some of them we had to bIow open,
and because we did
you've got more opportunities.
Don't get me wrong.
I am not saying
that things are perfect.
It's just that now you can fight our
battIes in the boardrooms, too.
And in the cIassrooms, the voting booths,
and the courtroom.
Just Iike your uncIe.
AII right, hoId it.
I thought you said
"by any means necessary.
"
Right, but it's up to you to figure out
what's necessary.
And, WiII, when the courtroom
doesn't work, come find me.
You're a deep sister, AdiboIa.
And you are the future, Hasani.
Agent Marcus CoIIins of the FBI.
If you need me,
I'II be upstairs saIuting the fIag.
-PhiIip Banks, my wife, Vivian.
-HeIIo.
How do you do?
I understand you're acquainted with a
woman named Margaret SmaIIwood?
I have reason to beIieve
she's been in contact with you, Mr.
Banks.
ReaIIy? What wouId that reason be?
We tap every BIack person's phone
in the United States of America.
Just a IittIe FBI humor.
But seriousIy, foIks, harboring a fugitive
can have grave repercussions.
Marjorie SmaIIwood is a very cIose
personaI friend of mine.
I consider myseIf
priviIeged to know her.
She was here,
but she Ieft some time this afternoon.
Do you have any idea
where she was headed?
As a matter of fact, she said she was
going to a nucIear power pIant in Texas.
But then again, she did mention
a migrant workers' camp in SaIinas.
No, honey, she said she was going
to a voters' registration drive in BiIoxi.
WeII, I thought she was just going to Saks.
Get the heck out of here.
You aII mean she ain't in the bathroom?
I must say, I'm disappointed in you,
Mr.
Banks.
I wouId have thought a man
in your position wouId be more aware
of his responsibiIities.
I know exactIy
what my responsibiIities are.
Son, wouId you show Agent CoIIins
to the door?
By the way, I don't think we've met.
Ricky Ricardo.
Yo, HiI, check out my horoscope.
"You wiII become a famous rapper with
your own TV show.
" That's dope, right?
Those things are ridicuIous.
What does mine say?
It says, "You are headed for a faII.
Beware.
Accidents can happen.
"
Those things are so stupid.
I wonder what I'II caII my TV show?