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Previously on
The Pantsless Detective
You!
NARRATOR: The Pantsless Detective in...
"The Mystery of the Pilot Episode"
Act 2: Enter ... the Rival
That's right.
It's McAdams, your old rival from the police force.
The one who got kicked off for misconduct.
The one who might have framed you for that misconduct.
The one who got that promotion you so richly deserved.
And all those cases you wanted so badly.
The one who was born to loving parents at an area hospital in the 90th percentile of both
height and weight.
I grew up a happy child excelling in both sports and the soprano tuba.
I first fell in love with police work when i was 7-years ol... -That's enough Billyclub
That's Williamclub to you. Pantsless.
Sgt. Williamclub McAdams. And don't you forget it.
I AM your biggest rival.
Yeah, yeah, Dollface, Whaddaya want?
A little birdy tell sme you're working the LaRue case.
Pretty small potatoes for such a promising up-and-comer. -Save it tater tots, I make a living.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just wanna make sure your fine goin after Bruno
all by yourself, -Bruno?
Bruno Wesienheimer? - the mysterious crime kingpin who controls most of the the nefarious dealings in town.
And rules with an iron - but the cops and the courts can't touch him.
No one's ever seen his face. - Well, you and I, we know these things, but it's good to
repeat them from time to time. - indeed.
But, what does he have to do with a simple case of infidelity?
Whadda I care?
If there ain't no crime, it ain't my time.
Good luck diggin' in the dirt, detective.
I knew what McAdams said was completely irrelevant and would not affect this case
one bit
so I followed LaRue from his office.
Smitty was wrong
Our squeaky clean mark was as smelly as a
fish broil over a tire fire.
Instead of going home, he drove to a quaint little shack. for a rendez vous
of biblical proportions. But then i noticed something familiar about his
Cherry strumpet. It was...Phem!
My client!
He was having an affair with his wife?
Of course!
Her evil twin sister.
This was going to be an open-and-shut case. Easy as pie. Smooth as silk. Tight as ham.
Yes, I'd plenty of time to surf FishnetsandTrenchcoats.com after closing this.
My office! What happened?
Who did this? Who did this?
You!
NARRATOR: Who ransacked the office so thoroughly?
Is his *** safe?
And does this look infected?
Find out next time on The Pantsless Detective.