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So, into the camera?
Dreams are for me... very interesting.
I always been interested in many things. Everything from music to construction work.
Everything I can come up with, everything I can think Of have I always been interested to understand
And figure out. If I haven't learned it in school have I tried to find it out by myself.
Going to the library, reading from Internet all of these things.
In dreams, however, it is very hard to understand.
Many people think that it is God talking to them.
Other people believe that dreams are brains way to process memories
Things you have seen during the day gather and filter and see those we dream as well.
For me it has been different I think.
I think everyone can say that they have dreamed something that is worldwide
crazy things and when they tried to explained it to their friends, but it has been reduced.
What dreams are for me. Is very wonderful thing, but it can also be negative.
But what I have thought of is that dream at all.
You don´t choose themselves always.
For me dreams have never been something big, but something you dreamed at night.
Sometimes you could dream of positive things and sometimes even negative.
Sometimes you remember them, and sometimes you didn't remember them at all.
But what if you could actually control your dreams, if you could decide what to dream about.
For example, go see Megan Fox or whatever. And then you could wake up in the morning and feel completely happy and positive.
I remember one particular dream I had a few years ago. I was in a depression in 2008 diagnosed with something called GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) paranoid crackdown.
That means I had anxiety attacks to go out, terrified at one special direction. I had paranoid crackdowns.
That means I imagined stuff.
It had gotten to me that if I would go out people would hurt me. So I did not go out.
I'm 100% on this, I was convinced that this was right and when my mom told me that I was wrong I didn't believe her.
I thought I had understood how the world worked, I thought I had understood what it looked like out there.
Even when my psychologist told me Berk you have Wrong, go out. I didn't believe her.
But I was not stupid, I realized that I must trust this professional people. And she told me that I have to confront my fears
That means that I must do things that I'm afraid of. Like going out when I didn't wanted to go out, talk to people I didn't wanted not to talk to,
Get into situations I didn't wanted to get into so I could train myself for it.
Then one day I had a dream. It was development of dreams and several dreams over a month.
I go straight on a road, the same road every night.
First, I am with many friends but I'm still terrified my heart pounds and I'm shaking and then I wake up, the bed is full of sweat.
But I always go on this road straight ahead and I'm equally terrified every time and every night it disappears people at a time, maybe two maybe three.
One night I dream that there are two people with me I dream one night that they leave me and have to go home to their mother and I have go a the last road.
Just at the end, where the last dream I dream that I'm all alone and I walk on this road straight ahead and I'm real shaky.
Then I see my greatest fear, five six guys, actually I never cared But they were punks who had Mohawks piercings and ***.
Then they were trying to rob a guy on his mobile phone. So I thought that I have to stop this, I think this is one hundred percent real, it feels real.
I feel like I feel in reality if Something like this would happen to me.
I see this leader guy's take the mobile phone so I need to stop this, so I take a picture.
Just when I take a picture of them they see me. I going to die now. I run but they are quicker than me because they are five.
Finally they reach me and the leader guy comes forward and ask me what I have done,
I said that I was photographing them so that they would not take the guy's cell phone.
So then I think I can make a deal here, that if I delete the picture they do not need to hurt me
And when I say this he starts smiling but I notice that his eyes went behind me,
Without me noticing while I've talking as I do right now, three of those guys started walking around me and they surrounded me.
It was the middle of the night.
I called the cats...
But they didn't appear so I went further out to call them, I shouted louder and louder.
Then I felt an uncomfortable feeling that something scary was in the garden.
I believed that it was a person, although I have not seen the object or I thought that it was a person.
I try to get closer to see what the scary thing is, and The funny thing is that I can´t see the object.
But when I try to go closer I feel a force that is trying to push me down.
For some reason I go in
I do not know why, I'm smart so I go into this building.
And every time I go up further up the stairs, it becomes more scarier
The first floor is very simple, you find something that is very scary,
But the higher you get it gets scarier and it really feels in my stomach and it feels so real that it makes the stomach hurt.
Finally when I find myself on the top, then i just want to go back down but the only way is to jump.
So I take the decision and I jump.
And then I wake up.
Terrified...
Completely soaked in sweat.
Feels like I been hit by a train..
It's terrible but I realize at the same time just when I wake up, Not exactly, but when I've got over the shock of what I've done
Now what my brain has done now for a month to go through them Dangerous situations in my head to cure me as what the psychologist said.
Like a Holotech thing from Star Trek when you go in and train your skills
My brain protected me by putting me in a dream situation when I was scared to death and then be able to survive the real world.
And that was a really big part of my healing process,
This experience...
For it saved me several months of deadly roads
Yes...