Tip:
Highlight text to annotate it
X
I like seeing friends
And just sort of...
taking it easy
and just sort of
being comfortable but not extravagant
I just love sitting down,
eating, drinking and being merry, really
There's that as well!
Christmas is celebrating
something to do with God, yeah?
But then again
Do you believe in God?
You know
They say it all goes....
it all goes round
It all goes round that sort of thing like
So I think Chrismas is a time
where people just goes out
and just goes mad
and buys people's gifts and stuff like that
Christmas is...
Jesus's birthday
I think
but I think it's not the exact date
I think something else happened on that date
But I'm not exactly sure
Christmas...
I love... I go everywhere
at christmastime with my mistletoe
attached to my glasses
And then I can kiss all the chaps
that I come in contact with
I managed to get the caretaker
Well, I didn't manage to catch him
because I had my mistletoe on
and he was... he was in the car park
and I went after him
And I showed him my mistletoe
and he ran
and he's a very fast runner
and I couldn't catch him!
It's just the excitement of er...
the excitement of actually ...er... you know
I still get a bit of a thrill out of it, yeah
after all these years
brings me back to my childhood
As I get older
I like hearing Christmas carols
and that's quite nice sometimes.
If it's cold at Christmas,
and there's snow on the ground
It's lovely, that side of it.
♪JingleBells, Jingle Bells
Jingle all the way.
So much fun it is to ride
On a one horse open sleigh ♪
So!
♪ Dashing through the snow
on a one horse open sleigh,♫
I love dressing up, yeah
I love dressing up at Christmas, yeah
The flashing earrings
and all the tacky stuff, you know?
I just like the atmosphere and
seeing the kids' faces
Yeah, just always liked it!
So, ♫ jingle bells, Batman smells,
Robin flew away
♪La la la da da da da da da da da ...♫♫♫
I used to love it when I was a kid but
I've been a bit busy these past couple of years so
I've... I've not really noticed it.
It's just flown by
and then it's been completely gone.
And the telly's so absolutely appalling.
Just don't really see it go by.
I feel awful for saying that
'cause I'm not miserable.
Christmas Eve we get off early
so we run around all this mad place.
Sometimes you get a bit jealous
with everyone else still
snugly wrapped up in their beds and
you're out there in the freezing cold
but it's got its compensations.
Yeah, being appreciated
That's actually... that's
that's the nicest part of it
when you are appreciated
I think it should go back to the way it was, like
the old pagan days
Christmas
Celebrating.... celebrating nature,
just sit down
with a big plate of organic food.
That'll do.
Winter is...winter is based on winter solstice.
She makes a marvellous cook
She makes a big turkey or chicken
The variety of pork, as well
Little sausages wrapped in bacon
Little prawn cocktails to start off with
I don't really enjoy proper... proper Chrismas meal
I did used to like a nice bit of turkey and stuffing and...erm...
spuds and all the vegetables but..erm
it's just salad and spuds for me now, I'm afraid
Trifle... It's always good
I'm always starving
so that's really what Christmas, l suppose, means to us.
There's always an argument, isn't there?
and sometimes even the turkey
ends up on the wall
I think even if you hate turkey,
you've got to have it at Christmas.
I think it's the law.
It's delicious turkey
Turkey butties, a bit of stuffing on it
You can't beat it
You cannot beat it.
A bit of cranberry sauce on mine.
No.
You can't beat that
I do feel I'm being pulled in all directions
erm...
They're all gonna get a piece of me
So we had the normal sort of, you know, lunch
and then sort of all sat around playing a few games and...erm..
We had this great.. erm.. room
'cause we've actually moved since but...erm
It was a converted barn
and it was just one massive
old stone barn with a snooker table in it.
It turned out to be a bit of a party,
which, you know, less of the sort of family stuff,
but more the sort of, you know,
let's have a great old time.
When I'm closing my eyes I go:
One... reindeer
Two... reindeer
three... reindeer
I count them
And that's what makes me go to sleep
It's best if you are a kid
'cause then you ask for something
like the new underwater
er... man with the special
er... tanks on his bank and flippers
And instead of that you get
this big chemistry set
and you're six years old
And you've got fifty test tubes
full of chemicals to play with
and you look at it and you go 'Oh!
Thanks!'
As far as exchanging presents goes, we've
given up that idea.
I think people get most stupid
with their money at Christmas
Erm...
You know, the amount of stuff
that people buy
I think people buy things
just for the sake of buying them.
They don't actually think
"Oh, this is useful." You know what I mean?
You can get, like a stocking
like a selection box, but a selection
stocking for pets.
That's different than sending your cat a card, isn't it?
'cause what can a cat do with a Christmas card?
Yeah, I can Imagine a farmer sending a card to his herd.
For the cow at Christmas!
Not to be confused with the wife or anything.
I'm obviously not crazy enough with my presents,
but one thing that I always, always give
and it's the best present, 'cause I was given it myself,
that is a fondue set.
The best present in the world
Great.
It's nice giving things
I came across an old saying
I love old sayings
They last because they're true
The grasping hand is never full
To be full, the hand has to give
The only thing I ever got given to me,
'cause I didn't want to buy it,
was a pair of Y-fronts.
I think that was the only thing
that was ever given to me,
but it wasn't a Christmas present.
But I certainly wouldn't give it to someone
for a Christmas present.
If you think it's tough for us
imagine what is like for Santa
How many billions of people
does he have to deliver to?
And he does it in
in about four hours
So he's pretty... he's a pretty cool guy
You know, especially for his size
he's very, with his big fat belly
I don't know how he does it.
Brilliant.
I had one of the most startling, not scary,
experiences of my life.
I actually bumped into, you imagine, a reindeer before
a deer, a reindeer, a big animal,
and I scared it, it scared me, I scared it,
we scared each other. Boom!
Completely dark apart from just light from the stars.
People probably say to you
"It must be tough having to work all Christmas"
That is... that is the sort of peak time
You can use all your different skills: your comedy
your timing...
Happy birthday, Santa!
Happy birthday, Jesus!
Happy Chrismas, everybody!