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>> So perhaps the greatest way to underscore the importance of gratitude is to think about a time
in your life when somebody that you worked for has not recognized
or appreciated what you've done for them.
For me, I can think of one specific time where it was never clearer to me.
I was working with a team of people to put on an annual leadership retreat, a workshop designed
to help the leaders in our company become even better.
And our team worked ceaselessly and tirelessly over more than 8 months.
We put in more late nights than I can possibly count,
and we were very excited about this retreat.
We thought it would go well.
So lo and behold, we had the retreat, people were raving about it.
They were approaching us afterwards and giving us high fives
and saying this was the best retreat we've ever been to.
So our team was pretty elated.
We gathered in a room next to where we had had the retreat to pat each other on the back,
and talk about how it had gone, and all of a sudden we heard the door swing open.
We looked over - it was our boss.
He saunters in, and we finally thought that he was going to give us the recognition that we
so desperately wanted for all the work we had put in.
But instead, he came over to us, pounded his fists on the table, and told us,
"Next year's needs to be even better."
And in that moment I felt such a profound sense of depression that I said,
"Why should I even bother next year?"
Now to his credit, I don't think he had any bad intentions.
In fact, he really did want us to get better that next year.
But that's what happens when you don't show gratitude and appreciation for the hard work
that your employees have delivered.
79% of employees cite "lack of appreciation" as the top reason
that they will leave one job and go to another.
Bankable leaders understand that as part of their arsenal to engage their employees
and make them perform to the best of their ability, gratitude is critical.
Fear of entitlement is one of the top reasons that managers fail
to give appreciation to their employees.
And rightfully so.
I have a leader that I worked with once who told me a story
that really hits this point home perfectly.
One Friday, because of all the extra hours her team was putting in that week,
she decided to bring them bagels for breakfast.
The team was elated and they devoured the bagels
and thanked her profusely and worked harder that day.
So the next Friday rolled around, and she said,
"The bagels had such a great effect, I'll bring them again."
So she brought them again, everyone was excited, and all was well.
The third Friday rolled around, and she didn't bring bagels, and what do you think happened?
At 9:30, one of her employees showed up in her office and asked, "Where are our bagels?"
So if you would like to banish entitlement in your team,
let's talk about two simple tools you can use.
The first tool that you can use is to differentiate individual recognition.
I cannot tell you the amount of times that I have heard comical arguments for rewards
that are essentially the same for employees.
For example, in your annual merit raise process, if you have an exceptional performer
and a mediocre performer, and you give that exceptional performer a 7% increase
and the mediocre performer a 5% increase, that's like organizational socialism.
On an average salary of $50,000, that's a difference of about $1,000.
Instead, what you have to do is differentiate the rewards you give to your best performers.
Otherwise, there's no incentive at all to perform well.
I used to work for one company that every year, out of its couple hundred or so leaders,
would give one Leader of the Year award.
The nomination process was rigorous and winning was a huge feather in your cap.
And each of us tried very hard every year to be the type of leader
that would warrant being the Leader of the Year.
The second tool you can use is to make team level recognition creative and unpredictable.
The logic behind this started with something called "operant conditioning" in 1938
with a scientist named B.F. Skinner.
I will spare you the details, but I will tell you the punchline,
which is that something called partial reinforcement for a behavior is what leads
to the strongest behavior in the future, and the most consistent behavior.
Here's an example.
If you're playing a slot machine, you probably find it very difficult to walk away.
The reason for that is because you receive partial reinforcement.
In other words, you don't get coins coming out every time.
If you did, it would be very easy to walk away and you would stop the behavior.
But you can't walk away and you feel like, just one more, just one more,
maybe I'll get that reinforcement.
You can apply the same theory to your team.
Our bagel leader did exactly the opposite.
She created an expectation with her team that every Friday,
when it rolled around, they would get bagels.
But instead, if she had chosen a Wednesday morning for bagels and maybe three weeks later,
a Thursday afternoon for cookies, it would be a pleasant surprise,
and the behavior would continue.
So I encourage you to think about that the next time you give a team level recognition.
How can I make this as creative and unpredictable as possible?
If you're interested in hearing more about the topic of entitlement-free gratitude,
you can go to my website at bankableleadership.com,
or take a look at my book, Bankable Leadership.
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