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Jory: (in overly placid Jedi voice) Don't try this at home.
Riley: (also in overly placid Jedi voice) I won't try this at home.
Are you guys trying to use Jedi mind tricks on our YouTube audience?
Do or do not- there IS no "try"!
Jory: (in arrogant C-3PO voice throughout intro) Oh! Hello, and welcome to "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" I'm your host, Jory Caron.
*Riley makes R2-D2 sounds in background throughout intro*
My friend over there is trying to say that he is Riley McIlwain. I don't know why I'm holding two of these things. Let's go and microwave them!
*theme song plays*
Jory: It smells like victory!
Jory: All hands to the deck!
Jory: Nobody likes roasted nuts!
Jory: Let's get outta here!
Jory: Ventilation is key!
Jon: What're you doing?! Put that out!
Jory: The masks- they do nothing!
Riley: (muffled) Be careful!
Riley: The tin foil shield- it actually worked!
Jon: Does it still work?
Jory: You're dumb!
Jory: Stopping, stopping!
Jory and Riley: 2.8!
Jory: Is it a good idea to microwave this?
Jory: (in C-3PO voice) Let's find out!
Here at the Jory Caron Laboratory 2.8, safety is THIS. And this is why we have this Sharp carousel microwave. Her name is Sindy! No, it isn't! What IS her name?
Riley: (in C-3PO voice) Master Caron, master Caron, the odds of surviving a microwave are 365,000:1!
Jon: Never tell me the odds!
Jory: The odds of surviving MY microwave are actually zero, so...
Jon: Yup! Wow! Look at that! You guys kinda cleaned out the food coloring from 6 minutes ago!
Jory: Yeah, yeah...
Riley: (in C-3PO voice) Our master, TechnoWizard, would never allow this to US! Oh, no!
Riley: (to C-3PO) Shut the [beep] up!
Jory: (to Riley) Dude, you snapped off his legs!
Jory: So, how long should we put this in there for?
Jon: This week DOES mark the anniversary of the first "Star Wars" film, which came out on May 24th, 1977!
Jory: So...?
Jon: So, let's put it in there for 77 seconds!
*stereotypical R2-D2 beeping*
Riley: (to Jory) Hurry the hell up!
Riley: WHOA!
Jory: God, yes!
Riley: Look at R2-D2's head!
Jory: (in C-3PO voice) Human-cyborg relation!
Jory: It's funny, because he's having protocol with my microwave right now!
Riley: Why does he say "cyborg"? In no way, shape, or form... WHOA!
Jon: (in C-3PO voice) R2-D2!
Riley: (in C-3PO voice) There's something wrong with the hyperdrive!
Jory: (laughs) The shields are down, the shields are down!
Riley: Oh, and R2-D2's gonna go up. He went up in flames! I think his rocket malfunctioned. I think we're smoking a lot. I'm gonna put the fan on.
Jory: Do you think C-3PO's lightsaber got...?
Jon: C-3PO does not know how to USE a lightsaber. He does not even have bendable arms! R2-D2 could kick his *** in a fight! The only thing C-3PO was good at was bending over and taking it in the ***!
Riley: Yeah, we've got 10 seconds left.
Jon: We didn't even need 11!
Jory: Masks on!
Riley: (muffled through mask) Fans are on, lights are on!
Jory: (muffled) Going in!
Riley: (muffled) Let's go, troop!
Jory: (muffled) Prepare, brace, fire!
Riley: (muffled) Go, go, go!
Jon: (muffled) I'm ready for you, Obi-Wan! We meet again, at last!
Jory: (muffled) Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi!
Jory and Jon: You're my only hope!
Riley: (disgustedly) OH! (starts in C-3PO voice and trails off) Human-cyborg... Master, master... (makes exploding sound)
Jon: Yeah, R2-D2's seen better days! I don't think he's gonna get those Death Star plans to the main computer!
Riley: I just ripped off his head!
Jory: So, you may be wondering, is it a good idea to microwave these "Star Wars" action figures?
Jon: Guys, I couldn't help but notice that C-3PO WAS able to make the jump to light speed in less than 12 parsecs, which is impressive, considering that a parsec is a unit of distance, not a unit of time!
Jory and Riley: Yeah!
So, that's about it for this episode of "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" I'm your host, Jory Caron.
Riley: (in overly placid Jedi voice) You WILL not do this at home!
*end credits play*
*Riley makes R2-D2 flying noises, ending in explosion sound*
Jon: I was about to say, "I don't remember when R2-D2 could fly." But then, I remembered that he DOES in "Attack of the Clones", and ruins all of the movies!
You WILL thumbs-up, comment, and subscribe! And favorite! And also, outside of the computer world, you'll also tell your friends about it in a positive light. Um...
Riley: (in overly placid Jedi voice) The light side of the Force!
*Click on episode #124 to see Jory admit to having whoopie with Whoopi, using his joystick controller!*