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Good morning, John. Thanks for making it animal sex week on a week when I have to write a
song. Tragedy of tragedies, I had to write a song about animal sex! Here it goes.
[singing] We've been together for a while girl, quite
a while, And I think by now I know how to make you
smile You love evolutionary biology
And elegant adaptations are so sexy But I want to teach you the realities of birds
and bees
We all know about giraffes girl, they make me laugh
Their men have more sex with each other than with their better half
And there is no better way to destroy A mood than to make a tortoise noise
But I won't do that stuff Just lovin' is enough.
Oh, baby there's a lot of ways to make a baby And if things go right for us I was hopin'
maybe We could try a couple out, see what the fuss
is all about It's just the birds and the bees and the chimpanzees
And if things go right maybe you and me
Dolphins certainly are cute, girl, but I must boast
Dolphin sex lasts just twenty seconds at the most
But what I got is pretty dull Next to the amazing barnacle
Their junk is fifty times bigger than their body size
And the male anglerfish gets completely screwed Proving sometimes sex sucks even for the dude
But the violent prize goes to the flatworm Using a sword-like *** to stab in his ***
It's an uncomfortable world... But not for my girl
Oh, baby there's a lot of ways to make a baby And if things go right for us I was hopin'
maybe We could try a couple out, see what the fuss
is all about It's just the birds and the bees and the chimpanzees
And if things go right maybe you and me Yeah, if things go right maybe you and me
Oh, if things go right maybe you and me
[speaking] Yeah? *wink* What do you think?
I put the bit about chimpanzees in because I wanted to put some footage of chimpanzees
having sex, but turns out it's a little too much like people having sex for me to be comfortable
with that.
Was it creepy? I don't...it was a little creepy. Let me know in the comments if you thought
it was creepy.
Speaking of asking and answering questions, I just started a new profile at a new site
called vyou.com - it's v-y-o-u dot com. And I'm at vyou.com/hankgreen and it's kind of
cool and I want to know what y'all think of it.
Now it's come to the time of the year where we must face the uncomfortable truth about
space pasta. Several people made excellent calculations, and no matter how people do
calculations - several different ways - the unanimous response is that moon pasta is much
less efficient than earth beef.
My two favorite videos were Mike Lombardo's and the Dancing Hawk's. Mike Lombardo only
calculated the getting of the rocket to the moon and bringing it back from the moon with
the pasta on board. And that turned out to be something like four hundred times more
energy intensive than growing a cow, which honestly seems a little low to me. The Dancing
Hawk, on the other hand, figured out how much it would take to get all of the supplies to
the moon necessary for building a farm there and then getting the pasta back, which if
it were done turns out would be the most inefficient endeavor in all of human history. According
to the Dancing Hawk's calculations, which seem pretty sound to me, it's about 6,500
times less efficient to grow moon pasta than earth beef.
And now we know. And knowing is half the battle. John, I will see you on Friday.
And this is the new screen that we're thinking of having at the end of all of our videos.
The stuff on the left hand side, you'll see the shirts and the Truth or Fail, that stuff
will change. The previous/next video thing will always be there after the Subscribe and
the Twitter and the Facebook things. And I wanted to know what everyone thought of that
idea. Okay, that is all. Goodbye for real this time.