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You can shop online for anything, you just have to know what you're looking
for. And shopping for boyfriends is my most fav hobby.
[music]
I'm a Manhattan realtor so I'm just to getting
the right fit; and boyfriend shopping is like finding the perfect pre-furnished apartment:
you don't want to make the wrong mistake or your friends will start giving you redecorating
tips.
I don't think I'm finicky, I just need my boyfriend to be well versed in the arts, trilingual,
and the height range of 6'2" with no more than three percent body fat and earning a
modest salary of six figures. Oh and he should be 22.
Oh one sec... I think I just purchased a
baby! [laughs] It's my assistant.
Hello Sergio! Yes, did we close on the baby? Well how's the bone structure?
I only have a few simple don'ts: Don't
wear a sweater vest. No fluorescent lighting. No IKEA unless you're buying it in
irony. Or for some poor immigrant family. You're apartment should have exposed brick
and some sort of antique floor. And
In sum, my boyfriend should be funny, talented, chiseled, test at the genius level and have
no surviving family. I'm sure he's out there.