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>> I am Ron Paul and I say education is not a right.
>> I am Sarah Palin and I say turnip does not rhyme with meatball.
>> I am old and tired. I have a headache. >> Nevada is the best place to get Japanese
food. Alaska is the best place to get astronaut food.
>> I will win the 2012 election because I have more standards than anybody.
>> You mean you have more shoulder pads than anybody!
>> I have the IQ of a magician. >> Along with the personality of a cardboard
pizza box! >> Your hair looks like it came from a bakery.
>> That was rude and crude and you're an ancient dude. What do you have against college students?
>> Nothing. I think all young people deserve easy access to a college sweatshirt and colleges
provide that. >> You have so many wrinkles, they're a fashion
statement. Would you like to have lunch with me?
>> That would be smashing! I’m so glad you think my millions of wrinkles are a fashion
statement. >> I’m so glad you noticed my hair is actually
a loaf of bread. One more quick question: what do you think of Obama?
>> He is a total angel. He's charming, wise, and he has a latent similarity to Jesus Christ.
>> I couldn't agree more, although Barack Obama does have shorter and cleaner hair.
His hair is like a cheeseburger. >> Exactly! Neat, enticing, and to the point
and he's as American as cheesesteak. God, I’m hungry. Now give me a kiss.
>> Not on your life, Forrest Gump!