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Hang in there, Dave
It'll all be over soon
Tony, I'm trusting you to guard us and this machine
With your absolute life
We all ready?
Well...let's find out
Sweet dreams
How do you all feel?
Very unpleasant
Body tingles like vibrations...hrm
Spider-Man was dreaming a *** in your trenchcoat, bucko
What?...Oh shut the hell up, seriously
A pretty pink "Hello Kitty pen island adventure" one
With glitter and sparkles
Pen island...what are you five?
Rorschach,
it's just the sedative dealing with our nervous system.
will all adjust momentarily
or I'm gonna hurl chunks
Oh god...
I feel like I was smacked by the Hulk and trampled by a crowd of angry Oprah fans.
I've had mexican food between my teeth with more kick
It's more like those Irish pub kinds of hangovers
'03 was a good year
Never did catch that leprechaun, though
Why do I not get the pleasure of thinking about you passed out,
drunk in the fields of Ireland, drowning in a pool of your own liquor induced vomit
Let's get to work people!
Now, let's re-evaluate our roles, scope out, and find Mr. Lizewski.
Okay...but where-?
You costumed chaps better take a look at this
Ah, well of course
Wow...Why am I not surprised
It is his dream afterall
You could say that again, chap. Place looks like it was drawn up
by a four year old
...Right Child at head of city politics
People recieve same results. Heh...irony
I don't know...I'm still cautious
Won't he realize he's dreaming and thus ruin this whole plan?
Dave's a smart kid, Pete...
stupid
but he's had his moments.
I have no reason to believe he will see through the heist and ruin the plan
Ok...why?
We're going to trick him
We can't let him know what we're doing, and expect him to follow through with it.
Would you let 4 spooks and a bum into your brain, and expect them to not tamper with anything up there?
No
which is why we have to fool him into going along with it Yeah yeah yeah, but how?
you'll see
I agree
Maybe too complicated to convince
Could possibly tell this is a dream.
Evidence is very, very obvious
Other than the architecture, what else are you impl-?
His wife is Lady Deadpool
Oh, you've got to be *** me! No way!
In your dreams could NEVER
have been more true
And it looks like Dave hit the imaginary jackpot
okay, it's possible he'd be so love drunk that'd he wouldn't think twice about it?
It's worth a shot
Could save us some time...maybe not
Could screw the whole mission up
So what we gonna do here?
Well as I was saying
we need to take Kick-*** from his comfort zone
but we can't make him suspect anything is wrong.
I have a plan
We're going to kidnap him and make it seem like we're saving him from some
sort of threat to his own subconscious.
Seth and Rorschach will be disguised as assassins
We're going to need you two
to fake the assault on him.
Problem being that Kick-*** will have defenses.
It'll be his interpretations of fighters that will interfere, while trying to take you down.
Do what needs to be done for the idea to sink in...
After the assault, Spider-man and I will rescue him
Rorschach and Seth, when we give a signal
retreat
and follow our lead
Seth, while still disguised
you'll be forged as...
someone close to Dave
and you'll need to fake a capture by Rorschach.
can you do that?
seems pretty cut-and-dry, boy.
This will throw Dave off when he unmasks you, Seth,
and make him question the purpose of this attack,
Rorschach, that's when you come in, again.
You'll have to trick Kick-*** into trusting you,
making him believe that you've been with us, not with Seth
We'll offer him a spot on our team
and he'll want to get into Seth's head when we offer him the chance.
In the second dream will be the info that the attack on the fourth wall was just an elaborate set up.
And with that he'll believe that superheroes have always existed
We scope out, find the idea, and we're home free.
Riiiight
You think the fans are going to buy into that?
a writer can only try so hard with an interpretation before his own *** trips him up.
Go figure
Well, unfortunately
Sam Raimi still has a career, so
I'll take your word for it
Heh, well it's not like the lot of em can *** and moan at us for trying, right?...
Suspension of disbelief will get ya a long way
ya buggers...
The clock is ticking, boys
Time to move out?
Well, what are ya chaps waiting for?
LETS ROCK AND *** ROLL!
Ah this is the life
no school..... no evil *** trying to kill me.....my own comic book store
inside city hall
and of course, my gorgeous sugar momma.
Hey puddin *smooches*
i've never been more happy in my entire-
I'll take this, dear
Oh boyss, yooo hooo!
it's How about you show a girl a good time with a dance?!
*Seth* *** *Rorschach* Inappropriate ***
No time for arousal, Seth
MUST MOVE
Pretty please stay still and I promise I won't cut your heads off!
Wait, is she talking about the head on our shoulders or the head on down on our-
*Seth* The lady has a fair compromise, don't ya think Ror- *Rorschach* NO. Never compromise!
Heh heh heh
What are you doing?
Improvising
Nooooooooo!
Now your turn
Woops...sorry
Spidey!
Did someone order a swift helping from your friendly neighborhood Spider-man! Two bozos extra beat, or you don't have to thank me.
Two bozos extra beat
or you don't have to thank me!
Time to go for a spin!
Package is moving. Seth, we must pursue
Car's out back
I'll be with ya in a sec
Think I cracked a non-existant rib
No time for jokes. Need to meet them at the warehouse
Stick to the plan
Now hold it right there!
We'll shoot!
Now now, fellas put your g-...
Is that a *** bazook-
What the *** is going on?!
Assassins are trying to kill you! Why?
i don't know but we're gonna get to the bottom of it buddy, don't you worry!
I've got a friend who's gonna get us out of here!
Thanks a lot, I appreciate it.
I can't tell you
what a fine service you just did to save your mayor!
Don't thank me yet Mr Mayor!
Here they come!
Jesus Christ!
*Rorschach* Must not hit target, Seth *Seth* hey, I'm not even *** hitting them. Just let me do my-
Don't want unnecessary casualties on our
Just keep driving the *** car, man. I've got this
Someone's bloody shooting at us!
***, we're getting hit from the back! *Rorschach* Subconscious attacking?
Must keep in pursuit!
Mate, we gotta bail. I think we're hit bad!
No, never surrender!
Must keep to the plan!
Gimme the wheel, then! Get yourself to the warehouse! I'll handle this! *Rorschach* Keep in pursuit
Christ, you gotta be kidding me. Not the *** baz-
I think we lost them
Can someone please explain to me; who is trying to kill me!?!
What the hell?
Batman, pull up over here.
Hang on there, sparky!
Oh god, oh god!
Let's get him into the truck. Come on!
I'm gonna kill this *** for what he's done!
Now hold on, hold on.
Let's take care of this first.
Spider-Man...
Deadpool?
No way
I don't believe it
Why would he do this all this crap? Wake him up!
Wake him up right now!
Sorry guys I kinda hit him a little too hard
Might have actually cracked a few of his teeth
I think he'll be out cold for hours
Well there's gotta be something we can do! I want to know now! *Rorschach* Maybe I can be of some assistance?
Hey! It's one of the other assassins! Take him down! Now!
He's with us.
Rorschach?
Listen carefully, boy.
I'm only gonna explain this once
B-But why should I trust you?! You were one of the assassins!
You both killed my wife!
You have no wife.
You're in a dream, kid.
A dream?
Everything you're seeing right now is not real
Even us. Not real.
We're figments of your subconscious, and we're specialized to protect you from any penetrations
of the mind.
So...my mind is under attack?
You've been kidnapped by terrorists trying to raid your mind, and use it as a weapon.
Your friend, here, is either with them, or not even real.
He may be a figment of the terrorists subconscious.
Why?!
What about you?! *Rorschach* I was never with them.
Infiltrated their group
blended in as a spy before they could hijack your mind
I have no idea what Deadpool is doing here, or why he is with this group,
but what's certain,
is that they tried to alter your sense of reality, make you believe that this,
all this, was real, and what was real...wasn't.
Holy ***...
is there a way to stop them?
We don't know if they have
or haven't caused any psychological damage
but what they were after, their motives, we can find, and extract.
I have the equipment in the trunk that can put us into his mind.
If we can do that,
we can find out his motivation,
which can lead us to this idea they were trying to alter.
Really?
What are we waiting for, let's do it!
We're wasting time, and who knows what they could have done.
Okay let's go
Mr. Lizewski,
have a seat.
Wait, so there's no red-
No
And...there's no blue p- *Eric* No
*Kick-**** So, what is- *Eric* Just hold still
Can we make it in t-
You'll have plenty of time.
And the idea...
Where do we go looking?
Simplest of places.
From my previous experiences, it's always hidden in the simplest of places.
I have faith in you, Rorschach
Ready for Round 2, Seth?
Righty right, Eric. Born ready, and die ready.
I'm trusting you to help assist them through this,
no matter wh-
All's good so far.
and if all else keep well,
Inkblot will lead us on a very merry chase,
and we'll be out of here before wakey-wakey time.
Sixteen minutes
When you hear this playing, you've got sixteen minutes until I drive the van off
that peer, and shortly after, Tony will wake us from this level.
You're really gonna drive the van off the bloody peer?
Yes, that's what I said
Welly well, sounds like a plan, me boy!
Sleep tight, Mr. Samael.
uh, guys...did...
did it just get a little warmer in here?
Or is it just me who feels like the human torch?
Big Man to *** Tracy. Tellt hem bloody *** to
Quit their whining!
Would they rather be in my Randomtropolis, or at Charlie Manson's playhouse?
Remind me again why Seth and Bats are at Supes' house,
And why we're stuck over here in Frank Miller's wet dream.
Diversion
Drive subconscious away.
Come on, something's off. Shouldn't we be looking for the-
Subconscious would believe idea was planted in a structure as prominent as The Fortress of Solitude.
Seth and Batman will drive the figments towards them,
away from where the idea is really hidden.
Eric said it will be in the most common of places
Suspect maybe a place close to the boy?
Must investigate further
So where are we going? Come on, we have to find out where the terrorists would have gone to...
May be of some significance?...
Come on, let's go
We're moving in on a premises.
Keep subconscious occupied.
Roger that, mate.
We gonna meet you there for the kick?
Affirmative.
Trackers are working. Follow our trail.
Okey-dokey. Over and out-
Clock will be ticking, boy.
Let's get this out of the way...
Iron-Man
Picked up a tip on something big going down here.
Some sort of a "heist."
They said it was gonna be big.
Very complex.
Something right out of a science fiction movie.
So I decided
to look into it
Quite a job, don't you figure, Stark?
Then I looked into the details and the members
I didn't know you had my name attached to this project?
So as I said,
I looked into the details
Found some disturbing evidence.
Something
that could change the face of reality? Seemed mad
but then again,
so is Rorschach.
I believed him to be dead?
I didn't know you had supernatural forces working with you...
And again,
I'm supposedly attached?
The records checked out, Stark.
This man is obviously not me.
Everywhere he's been, everything he's done, is not me.
It seemed a little too
far fetched on "chance."
With any luck-
The armor was a good choice.
Full concealment; it replicates his abilities and in this day in age, anyone can practically steal
one suit of armor while Tony's wasted, drunk out of his mind.
You gave yourself away.
Stark never shuts the hell up
but then again...
neither do you.