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Russell's reign begins and someone gets the ultimate ***-block. I'm Alex and if you haven't
seen last night's True Blood, "Hopeless," this is your official spoiler alert.
To kill or not to kill Russell.. While Bill & Eric debate that fateful decision, Alcide
is being torn to shreds by a werewolf.. which would normally be tragic except for the fact
that it ended with him strutting back over with his pants undone, and some weirdly sexy
man-on-man healing action with Eric. Wait a second. Did he just glamour Alcide into
putting himself in the friend zone, ruining all of our dreams of a REAL Sookie-Alcide
hookup?? NOOOO! Eric Northman, you are officially on my *** list.
In other news, Girl fight! Girl fight! Girl fight! Jessica and Tara continue to feud over
Hoyt, of all people… who is still wearing that ridiculous purple shirt. Come on, Tara.
Your maker is a former madam.. i mean matchmaker.. so I'm sure she can find someone new and tasty
for you, now that you've finally stepped up for style game. In the meantime, keep your
fangs to yourself.
On the topic of Hoyt, although he has been pretty useless this season
aside from starting drama, he just might be the key to the identifying those creepy masked
murderers. Speaking of which, it looks like Luna and
Sam will survive after all, for now. But meanwhile Emma has wandered into her creepy grandmother's
clutches. Let the werewolf mama drama continue. Oh hey!! The vampire authority is breaking
out the expensive blood in honor of Russell's capture… Roman is all dressed down in his
'caz' outfit, Nike polo shirt, but I'm no fool. This is not a party. Roman is clearly
up to something, and unfortunately we'll never know because Russell has proven to be too
powerful even for the authority. What I wanna know is.. why did no one else step in to prevent
Russell from staking Roman? Is everyone in on this pro-Russell, sanguinista movement?
Meanwhile, Terry's fire monster curse has driven him to do the gentlemanly thing and
end things with Arlene. That girl has the worst luck with men. To be fair, she does
live in the most cursed town on TV, so maybe she and her kids should hit the road and she
can join match.com where they probably screen for stuff like serial killers, vampires, and
fire monster victims. Just a suggestion. So many questions: will Alcide successfully
take over as leader of his pack? Who is this mysterious cloaked vampire who supposedly
murdered the Stackhouse parents? And what is Jesus's head trying to tell everyone? Sound
off in the comments with your own thoughts and check back with me next week for more
True Blood scoop.