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Danny: I gotta lay off the nuggets. Twitter: I'm not a chicken. I'm Twitter.
Danny: Twitter's not yellow. Twitter: I'm here via Tweetdeck.
Danny: Awesome. Some people get stalked on Twitter. I get stalked by Twitter.
Twitter: Listen, @dannyrocks. Danny: Just Danny. Out here in reality, or
wherever this is. Twitter: Your followers are worried. You're
not sending any Tweets. You're not even answering your DM's which is a major social media faux
pas by the way. Danny: I wonder what would happen if I stuck
my iPhone in this thing. Twitter: You were on a trajectory like this.
Your cloud score was soaring. You're gonna have 500 followers before you know it.
Danny: We had a-! We had a baby. Twitter: That seems tweetworthy.
Danny: My real friends know we had a baby. Twitter: Your Tweets 10 May. Headed to the
hospital. More Tweets and pics to come. That was three weeks ago. Classic Tweet-tease.
Danny: Well Twitter, can we just call it paternity leave? I mean a day, a week. I'll get back
to it okay. Twitter: But you're missing some prime stuff
here. Tweet every feeding. Tweet every dirty diaper. Followers eat that sort of stuff up.
Danny: I don't need to validate my fatherhood experience on Twitter.
Twitter: Which would make a excellent Tweet by the way. Think of me as your digital baby
book, a repository for all these sweet and tender moments that you're having with your
baby. Danny: So you're committed to archiving my
Tweets for my lifetime and the lifetime of my child.
Twitter: Sorry about that. A little down time. Did you say something?
Danny: Can I just take a break? This is a new gig. Not sure what I want to share and
what I want to keep for myself. So this is done. I gotta go take care of the baby.
Twitter: You'll need me to express how you feel about it.
Danny: My love for my son seems greater than 140 characters.
Twitter: See, you're a natural. Meh. Just wait till Facebook gets a hold of him.