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If you’re watching this video, it means I’m dead.
365 days and I got nothing.
So what are you gonna do?
I’m gonna comb my hair with a freaking sausage.
Duh, I’m killing myself!
But before I killed myself, I had to take my last chance.
Your mom wants you to go and have dinner.
She says the food will get cold.
You know she gets hungry after sex.
Stop it!
Why? We ***.
Well, at least I did.
She didn’t. She, you know…
You disgusting ***!
What are you doing?
I’m writing a love e-mail.
I don’t think you know what that is.
Of course I know what love is.
Love is nothing but an excuse to stick it in and…
Come on. You can keep writing that *** later.
Your mom is holding her Avon meeting today and you know she gets really annoying.
Since now people download everything from the Internet,
they decided to close the video club. Now I organize meetings to sell sex toys.
I rule!
Wives keep telling their husbands I’m the Avon Representative, though.
Before I say goodbye I need to tell you that I love you,
and that if you would give me another chance we can meet in… Dickhe—
Fine. I’m banging his mom. Once. Twice. Thrice a day.
I’m *** her hard in every possible way.
But I’m not letting this little *** send love letters to mi ex-girlfriend.
Hey… you.
I messed it all. The e-mail I sent you earlier,
I didn’t wrote it for you. Bye.
I waited and waited but Cris never showed up.
So I was left to say goodbye to the one with whom I shared the best moments of my life.
I love you.
I love you Play Station. I love you.
I had a present for Óscar.
These are my lucky briefs.
I want you to keep them.
A dude about to kill himself decides to give me his “lucky” briefs?
Thanks.
This is it, then. In a matter of minutes I’ll be dead…
Kids, don’t be afraid of vaginas. And don’t get around girls near public bathrooms.
I love you Mom.
Thank you everybody.
Farewell.
I *** up! Even dead, I manage to do that!
I am used to leave home early in case I meet someone
I can have a quickie with in some elevator.
But I wasn’t that lucky, and I arrived too early.
Hello? I’m the Avon Lady. The door was open…
I was in luck. Hanged people die with a rock hard ***,
and I was going to experience the only paraphilia I hadn’t tried yet.
I love necrophilia! I love necrophilia! I LOVE NECROPHILIA!
Don’t go and ruin it all now!
I love necrophilia! I love—
Hey! What are you doing?
Of course it could get worse.
I LOVE IT!
Hey! What are you doing?
Pablo?
Cris. No!
You’re alive. How am I supposed to *** you like this?
So? What now?
Phimosis!
So it seemed I had to get circumcised.
But how was it done? Did I have to ask my mom for permission?
Forget about your mother.
Easy, man. I’m almost done.
Subtitulos por Aida Oda Dominguez