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Come on, Ebeneezer. Come on, play with me.
Okay, well, now I have to go to work, so you can just keep ignoring me.
Good cat.
Grandma?
Hello?
Oh!
Hi.
Hi. I'm Victor. And you're?
Um-
Speechless from my good looks.
Yes and I'm also Georgia. I'm sorry, I didn't see you there.
I was ducking. It's fun for me. Being short really doesn't have many other advantages.
You ever worked with a Little Person before?
Cause we are just like regular people.
As seen from far away.
Um, no I have not. Have you ever worked with a yogic healer before?
No. But I bet you get fewer strange looks than I do.
You haven't met my parents.
Don't answer it.
It's your mother. Oh really don't answer it.
My soon to be mother-in-law.
I owe you more sex.
I don't wanna.
I don't wanna, I don't wanna, I don't wanna.
Here we go.
Hello mother.
Not today. Because I'm working.
Yes it is work. Just because I'm not wearing a lab coat doesn't mean it isn't-
Maybe Thursday.
No.
No!
Because I have a boyfriend.
Fiancé. Fiancé.
Mother I have to go. I have to go. I have to go. I have to go, I have to go, I have to go, I have to-
Let me guess. She wants to introduce you to her patient's son.
But not just any patient. A bipolar, borderline personality disorder patient.
Wow. She must hate me.
Or me. And then in the next breath, she offered to take me wedding dress shopping.
How do I not have multiple personalities? I mean it's a miracle that I can put my socks on.
What if we eloped?
What?
Eloped, got married somewhere far away. I know what eloped means.
Well?
I mean.
I don't know. As nice as it sounds to not have to deal with my parents...
I don't know, I kind of always wanted that whole fairytale wedding thing, you know?
It's like, the dress, and the flowers, and the music.
Am I there?
Do you want to be?
Are your parents shooting at me?
Am I pregnant?
Right.
Are you?
I don't know, do you have super ***?
I might. Alright.
But why? That surgery sounds terrible. Stretching your bones.
Cutting them and turning a screw- Okay you don't need to describe it to me.
So, why do it?
Cause.
I want to be independent.
I want to be able to reach the gas pedal and the Honey Bunches of Oats at the grocery store.
Why do they always put the good cereal so high? All I can reach are the Target-O's.
And I, uh, want to go out on dates.
I don't want to have to ask somebody to get the condoms for me.
Want to be taken seriously.
Can I get up now?
Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. Um, lie down for me.
If only more women would say that to me.
Frog pose.
That's pain, that's pain right there.
Yeah, you're very tense.
And sticking your thumbs into it is helping how?
I'm trying to help you release the tension in your-
Body. My entire body. Which, really isn't that much when you think about it.
I'm sorry. I shouldn't laugh.
Why not? You made a joke.
Is your tension always so pervasive?
Yeah you know, it's weird. Being treated like a jolly, cute, infant elf, leads to tension. And yet it sounds so adorable.
It must be awful living with that day in and day out.
Could that be why you want the surgery?
Isn't that what I've been saying?
No, the infant thing.
I mean, maybe it's not just the height that you want to make you more substantial, but the actual pain of the procedure.
If you're going through that much pain people have to take you seriously.
You know you're perfect just the way you are.
I mean, you're clever and you're insightful, and you don't see that.
I mean I'm not saying that your life is easy, but I am saying that I can help you create more space.
I don't see how.
Well, I can't really explain it, but I know that it works.
Two years ago I was in med school. I had diabetes, I was losing hearing in one of my ears.
And nobody knew what was wrong with me and nobody knew how to fix it.
Except Ganesh.
He's my Yogi.
I'm assuming you don't mean the bear.
And you're funny. And funny is so much sexier than tall.
Thank you.
I'll think about it.
Okay.
You wanna dump your guy and go out with me?
Um, not yet. But if it doesn't work out, I'll let you know.
And in case you're wondering, I have a normal-sized ***.
Okay. Well I was not wondering that, but thank you for the very vivid image.
Okay!
So, shall we end in happy baby pose?
Alright.
Still thinking about it, aren't you? Yeah, you burned a *** shaped hole in my brain.