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The British Public here you see, The much abused and feared B. P.
In all our native majesty, We're here today.
We have opinions of our own And if they're wrong, and so it's shown,
We never let the thing alone, But peg away.
We've come to see the beasts today And if to enter we must pay,
It costs no more to go away - So let us stay.
And when the lion's cage we seek, No fear shall blanch our British cheek,
And, if the noble beast could speak - What would he say?
He'd say in well-known English staves, He'd say Britannia rules the waves
And Britons never never will be slaves, Hurray! Hurray!
Forbear! Rash one, we say, forbear!
Will somebody just kick the chair
And let me dangle in the air,
I'm tired of life.
By all means hang yourself up high,
If that's the way you choose to die.
But let us know the reason why.
Is it your wife?
No,
listen!
I loved her fondly and Her father had been a grocer,
But when I sought her hand He hastily answered "No sir."
"Your offer I refuse. If ever my girl should marry
She'll marry whom I choose And not an apothecary."
He sternly did refuse This poor young apothecary.
No meetings day or night, No letters with such restrictions,
At last I thought I might Communicate in prescriptions.
By her whom I adore In token of love were taken,
“The mixture as before” I trust 'twas nicely shaken,
Ah! one day I saw arrive A letter which from her sister
Implored me to contrive To send her papa a blister.
What joy pervades my heart See vengeance is now arriving,
I'll scarify the part With devilish art contriving.
He'll scarify the part With devilish art contriving.
A dose of peppermint, I thought it might please her rather,
I sent it her when I sent The blister for her father.
But when I called next day Bad fortune had turned the tables,
I much regret to say My boy had changed the labels!
Ah! and now, my friends you see The reason for my emotion
The draft of life for me Has turned to a bitter potion.
I cannot but suppose Of what happened you have a notion,
Her father used the dose And Laetitia took the lotion!
Her father used the dose And Laetitia took the lotion!