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If there is conflict at work, how do you demonstrate your emotions?
when you're angry, thrilled or otherwise feel strongly about an issue,
do you heat up
or do you cool down?
This demonstrative spectrum
runs from hot to cold.
From very loud to very soft.
From very verbal to very restrained.
Some cultures favor an open show of emotions by shouting
crying
using broad
gesturing body language
flowery and poetic words or swearing and cursing.
You express your passion, your integrity and your commitment
to an issue or person
by how vividly you display those emotions.
Your animation is proof
of your veracity and your commitment.
On the other hand
some cultures prefer
a low-key
“rational” approach
an even
and quiet tone,
minimal body language
a reduced display of emotions
to show
maturity
and thoughtfulness
and to avoid disruption.
If your style is to heat up,
you'll find your cooler counterpart
downright cold. Does he not care about this issue or working it out?
He just walked away from me!
But if you ARE the cool cucumber
using your “inside voice”
and doing your best
to reduce tensions,
your passionately arguing co-worker
most likely feels to you
out of control.
Indeed, you may well think he is simply having a tantrum.
You much prefer to leave that for another day, you tell him,
saying
“when we can both act like adults.”
The inevitable result if you don't recognize these different styles?
Friction at best,
frustration and fury
internal or external
depending, of course, on your style.
Animated or rational?
Where do YOU fall on this spectrum?