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IRV: Previously on Everwood:
Ludwig van Beethoven,
"Piano Sonata No. 8 in C-minor." Play.
-Invite me to your recital. -You'd wanna come?
Of course I would. You're an awesome player.
You're still upset with me. That's fine.
Still upset?
Should I be over your total betrayal of me...
...after only one day?
I mean, come on, Ephram...
...Colin's been through hell to get where he is.
Believe me, whatever that's wrong now, he can handle it.
No, he can't.
-Well, then I can. -Good luck with that.
IRV: Throughout the centuries...
...mankind has been fascinated by the nighttime sky.
Ancient peoples believed that the heavens were ruled...
...by a pantheon of gods...
...while others thought that the stars were diamonds...
...dangling just out of reach.
AMY: Thanks for the ride, Grandma. If it weren't for you...
...I'd probably never see Colin outside of school.
-Junior still isn't driving you? -I refuse to ask for any favors.
Why give him the satisfaction of being dependent on him...
...when I could be dependent on you?
I see your point.
Although Mr. Randolph does have that taxi available.
If he would acknowledge that he made a mistake...
...I might be able to forgive him, but he thinks he's right.
-You think he's totally wrong? -I know he's wrong.
He acts all righteous...
...like he's so much smarter than me, that I wanna--
Grab his hair and beat his head against the wall...
...till he barks like a fox?
-Heh, yeah. -Believe me, I've been there.
When I told your dad I was marrying Irv,
you should have heard him go on...
...all puffed up like a damn blowfish.
The trick is, don't let him get to you.
Remember, it's all about power.
Exactly. So right.
You're the only person in the family...
...that's even tried to see my side of this.
You're the only one who really gets me.
No, no.
Maybe you and Irv could come over for dinner tomorrow.
It's been a nightmare lately, but if you're there...
...it might take some of the pressure off.
-Or it might *** off your pops. -That would just be a bonus.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Count me in.
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
Hello?
It's for you.
I gave Colin your number so he could reach me, okay?
-Of course it's okay. -Thanks, Grams. Hello?
Oh, I miss you too. Heh, heh.
Grandma.
I gotta go. I'll call you back.
What?
Would you look at that?
Wow, it's all glowing.
IRV: With all the advances in technology of late...
...modern science offers more opportunities...
...than ever before to help unravel the mysteries...
...of the night sky.
What the heck do you think it is?
Amy?
Amy?
Hey, Colin?
Yeah, I'm back. Yeah, I don't know. Some weird star thing.
IRV: And yet it seems that the closer we get to the stars...
...the less we actually understand them.
Now, be honest but constructive.
So, what do you think?
It's good.
Morning. Wanna try one of my soon-to-be-famous omelets?
It's safe, I promise.
It's alright, I should get going.
Did you pick up my suit?
I picked both of ours up at the cleaner's last night.
You think, uh, dark blue's appropriate...
...for an Everwood recital?
Yeah, it should work.
Good, because I canceled my appointments for Friday.
I don't want anything to interfere.
It's a recital, not a big deal.
Do you get to do the finale?
He always gets the finale. It means he's the best.
Uh, I don't know yet. The finale was a bigger deal in New York.
Here I'm playing with guys who think an arpeggio...
...is a form of pasta.
You didn't invite many people, did you?
Uh, no.
And you know who to invite, right?
Mm-hm.
-Who? -Who what?
EPHRAM: Who'd you invite?
-Don't you trust me? -No.
-Nina, Sam, Edna, Irv, Harry. -Who's Harry?
If you want I'll disinvite him, but he's gonna be disappointed.
No, Harry can come. Nobody else.
I don't want some cheering section.
If I see one video camera, I'm walking out.
Don't forget, you're in charge of cups.
Roger that.
Cups.
Don't worry, Dad, I got your back.
ANDY: I gotta tell you, I don't know of too many lumberjacks...
...except for Paul Bunyan and that paper-towel guy.
Well, we're just like normal folks.
Just got more chain saws, that's all.
Well, sit down and tell me what the problem is.
I've had some, uh, bruises crop up lately.
I don't know where they're coming from.
I'm not the kind of guy to be worried about a little bruise.
Betsy thought we ought to check.
They're very purple.
I woke up one morning, and there they were.
BETSY: They're getting worse. -Well, let's have a look.
ANDY: Hmm.
What do you think?
It's hard to tell at this point. Could be any number of things.
Could be an infection...
...or sometimes an allergic reaction can cause bruising...
...or it could be something as simple as a vitamin deficiency.
I think we ought to run a blood test...
...to make sure it's nothing more severe.
I'm gonna be leaving town in few days.
Things have been slow...
...so I'm going to Alaska to work for a couple months.
-Can this wait till I get back? -Didn't you hear Dr. Brown?
This could be severe.
You're not going anywhere until we know for sure.
She loves me. Heh, heh.
I wouldn't worry too much about it.
I'm sure we'll get to the bottom of this.
-Describe what it looked like. -It's hard to.
All I know is that it was the strangest thing I've ever seen.
I ran into Brenda Baxworth at the market.
She'd been on the phone to NASA for two hours...
...trying to get somebody here to identify it. Heh.
There's only one explanation: aliens.
-Bright. -Yeah, don't believe me.
When green men come in knockin'...
...who do you think they're gonna invite to the ship?
We should be so lucky.
Why do we've to figure it out? Some things can't be explained.
Stonehenge, crop circles, Edna's aversion to cooking.
You don't look like you're starving to me, big fellow.
I hate to end this aimless debate...
...but the answer's rather simple:
the aurora borealis, a.k.a. the northern lights.
Could we please change the subject
to something less tedious?
You're wrong.
Excuse me?
The northern lights are caused...
...by physical and chemical reactions...
...from solar winds colliding with air molecules.
And they only move on the Earth's magnetic field.
You only see them when you're closer to the poles.
We're too far south.
And the clouds are colorful: red, blue, violet.
The lights we saw were white and moving around.
How do you know all that stuff, Miss Honors-Science?
God had to do something with the other half of your brain.
Maybe you and I can figure out what it is.
Like when we used to play X-Files.
We can gather evidence, look for clues.
You're forgetting you're grounded.
What for?
Mulder here blew the curfew last night.
-Came in late from Colin's. -What's the big deal?
It's not like I'm going anywhere that counts as fun.
-No offense. -None taken.
We're gonna solve a scientific mystery. I'm still grounded.
Do you think if aliens would probe you...
...you'd still be considered a ***?
[SIMPLE MELODY PLAYING ON PIANO]
Hey.
Is that what you're playing for the recital?
No, I got something better. "Axel F."
from Beverly Hills Cop.
MATT: Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late.
Okay, so the recital is in two days.
I thought we'd change things up by rehearsing together.
So I want you to split up into groups of two.
The person you're paired with will be your page turner.
But you should have your music memorized before the show.
I'll let you know by Friday what the order for the show will be.
Ephram, you're with Kate...
...and you guys will play first tonight.
-Hey. -Hey.
-So how's it going? -Good.
How long you--? How long you been with Matt?
-A couple of years. You? -Oh, just a few months.
You wanna go first, or should I go first?
I'm already memorized, so....
-Okay, well, my stuff's in my-- -No worries, I'll just go.
[PLAYING BEETHOVEN'S "MOONLIGHT SONATA" THIRD MOVEMENT]
Where were you?
Well, after spending the early morning hours...
...delivering the last of the invitations...
...I decided to go shopping.
I was supposed to get regular cups, right?
Uh-huh. So, what did you get?
Well, you said you couldn't remember which kind Mom got, so:
Fortunately, Mr. Johnson had a shipment of 16-ounce Solos.
They were a steal.
So, what do you think? Does red say recital or what?
I don't know, you might have to take some back.
Well, either that or throw a kegger.
-What are all these for? -For your guests.
EPHRAM: What guests?
Well, four people just R.S.V.P.'d.
I hand-delivered the invites myself.
Good. Then you can take them back, right?
-What, the cups? -No, the invitations.
Was the recital canceled?
I decided I don't want anybody there. It's no big deal.
It is a big deal.
Could you at least tell me why?
Because it's my recital and I don't want anybody there.
Well, does this have something to do with Mom?
I know your last recital--
It's got nothing to do with that.
That's not what everything's about.
Well, then what is it about?
Just because it's not Mom doesn't mean I'm gonna tell you.
I guess I'm supposed to be happy with that.
Yeah.
We could throw a pregger.
[PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]
Ha. The good ship Fruitcake has definitely landed.
Officers. Enjoying this, are we? Hello?
[HORN HONKING]
Come on, you losers.
Blast off, you bozos. Move it.
Oh, well, now, let me just hit this one.
How many points is that? Hello?
You tie-dyed space freaks, move it.
My God.
Hey, would you like to buy a crystal?
No, I would not like to buy a crystal.
What I would like is for you and your hippie entourage...
...to hightail it out of here, yesterday if possible.
Hey, power vortices are moving northward, man.
-You better be prepared. -Power vortices? What is that?
A term you picked up in Ben and Jerry's physics class?
No way, dude. Vortices are part of the alien plot.
It's pointless to do so, but might I point out...
...that after several NASA missions...
...and spending billions of tax dollars...
...the search for extraterrestrial life...
...has proven fruitless for decades?
We are alone, dude. Better get used to it.
According to Carl Sagan...
...it's 99 percent certain there is other life in the universe.
I should've known you'd be on the side of wack jobs.
If you could find an alien race...
...that didn't watch Joe Millionaire,
you wouldn't consider relocating?
If I thought that was even a remote possibility...
...I would've been beamed up long ago.
Ladies.
Well, your blood test came back negative...
...for infection and allergies...
...and you're clearly suffering...
...from something much more severe...
...than a vitamin deficiency.
So then it might be aliens?
Well, if I had to bet on a fight between Chuck and an alien...
...I'd put my money on Chuck.
But we could bring in Bigfoot...
...or the Loch Ness monster for questioning.
Are you a heavy sleeper, Chuck?
Yeah, as a matter of fact, we both are.
We joke that if the house were to burn down
while we're sleeping, neither of us would wake up.
ANDY: Good to know.
Well, how about sleepwalking? You ever done that?
Yeah, as a kid.
My mom used to say she'd catch me in the kitchen...
...in the middle of the night stealing cookies.
But that was years ago.
Nonetheless, Previous history is a good indication
that this might be the root of your problem.
I'm gonna recommend we set up a sleep clinic...
...right here in my office.
-A sleep clinic? -Mm-hm. Just standard procedure.
You'll go to sleep like normal.
The only difference is, you'll be here.
That'll give me a chance to observe
and figure out what's causing these bruises.
-Should I come too? -I'd rather observe Chuck alone.
It's usually better if the patient remains isolated.
You think you can make it on your own?
I'll do whatever it takes.
Great. I'll see you tonight.
I'll bring milk, you bring cookies.
Great. Chocolate chip or oatmeal?
AMY: Oh, Ephram's recital. Cool.
I see your dad went for the fancy lettering.
Yeah, no, I didn't know he sent you one.
So are you nervous?
I'm trying not to think about it.
I know what you mean. My ballet recitals are so stressful.
My dad invites like a million people.
Well, consider me R.S.V.P.'d, anyway.
Sure about that?
Um, yeah, I mean...
...unless you don't want me to be there.
I just--
I don't know if it's the best idea.
You're afraid you'll mess up or something?
I appreciate you trying to act like everything's normal...
...with this whole Colin thing, but we both know it's not.
And I think it's best if we just kept our distance...
...for a little while, don't you?
Yeah.
I guess you're right, Ephram.
Good luck.
-Hey. -Hey.
-You always gone to County? -Not by choice.
That's weird, I never noticed you.
Should you have?
Well, I like to know when I'm in the presence of greatness.
I mean, I thought I was good, but you were amazing.
You didn't notice my dynamics were off...
...my fingering was wrong...
...and I rushed the tempo in the allegro?
I'm just glad I'm not gonna have to play after you. Ha, ha.
-How do you know you're not? -Oh, because you're the best.
The best player goes last.
I could play perfectly, and I wouldn't make the finale slot.
-Matt knows what he's doing. -Matt does know what he's doing.
Trust me, Liberace has a better shot at the finale than I do.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
HARRY: What on Earth is this?
Hello? What...? Excuse me.
Can I get in past you all, strange people?
Excuse me, carbon-based life form coming through.
-Excuse me. -How many in your party today?
There's a wait to get into Mama Joy's?
Unless you wanna share a table.
I'd buy everyone here a one-way ticket to Roswell...
...before I'd be seen breaking bread with the lunatic fringe.
What...?
[CHUCKLES]
Speaking of.
This is a turn of events.
It may be the first time that you're not...
...the craziest person in Mama Joy's.
ANDY: Thanks. Feels good.
You don't happen to have that recital invitation, do you?
-No, why? -I have to disinvite you.
It's not my choice. I have no choice.
I take it back, you're still the craziest person in Mama Joy's.
No, no, it's not me, it's Ephram.
He keeps changing his mind from one minute to the next.
I can't figure out what he wants.
That seems like a simple case of pre-recital jitters.
He's nervous. Doesn't wanna make a fool of himself...
...in front of 300 people let alone in front of his father.
Although you've humiliated yourself plenty...
...in front of him, it's not a big deal for your family.
CHUCK: Dr. Brown. -Hey, Chuck.
Remember that, uh, sleep-clinic thing we were gonna do tonight?
I can't, something came up.
Can we, uh, switch it to tomorrow?
Give Edna a call. She'll put it on my schedule.
-Thanks, I appreciate it. ANDY: Mm-hm.
What were we just talking about?
Ephram's recital tomorrow. Oh, damn.
Um....
I don't suppose you've ever run a sleep clinic, have you?
Nice try, doctor. I'm not here to pick up your slack.
I'm sure, you and Mr. Dodd will find a mutually agreeable time.
That's gonna be tough...
...especially since he's leaving town in a couple of days.
He has got these mysterious welts all over his body.
I'm just afraid if I wait too much longer...
...the Everwood lights will disappear
and possibly Chuck's welts with them.
You and I know that the lights, whatever they are...
...have nothing to do with Chuck Dodd's mysterious welts.
Yeah? Tell that to Betsy.
She is convinced aliens have done this.
She has given an exclusive for the Pinecone.
I don't wanna see what press people are capable of...
...once they get their hands on some hard evidence.
If I do this, you know...
...it is only because I cannot pass up an opportunity...
...to disprove the National Enquirer.
Oh, absolutely.
Menu?
EDNA: No, wait, wait. Go back to the phosphorescent minerals.
That theory doesn't make sense, Grandma.
Why not?
AMY: Because, um....
Um, light from minerals would be seen
just above the Earth's surface.
The Everwood lights were too high in the atmosphere.
What's that, newhart2002?
Oh, that's just an Internet thing.
Alright, well, what else have we got?
Um, how about ball lightning, meteor showers, renegade comets?
Well, that's about as likely as aliens.
Well, Grandma, I think the Internet has taken us...
...about as far as it can.
We can't quit now. If I don't come back...
...with a scientific explanation...
...I have to give Irv 50 bucks and three hot meals a week.
And we're talking stove hot, no microwave.
I'm not suggesting that we quit.
We should take this investigation to the next level.
Do a little field research.
We could camp out, hang with the alien freaks. It'll be fun.
You forgetting the definition of the term "grounded"?
You eavesdrop now. Good to know.
What do you say, Junior? You gonna give my granddaughter...
...permission to go off base tomorrow?
You of all people should know...
...when a child is grounded...
...it is the equivalent of a prison sentence.
That means no telephone, no TV, and absolutely no going out.
Well, where we're going, there are no phones, no television.
And with me as chaperone...
...it'll be more like a prison than a prison.
It's practically like homework, Dad.
Fine, fine, you may go.
And since it is practically like homework...
...I want a thousand-word typed, double-spaced report...
...on the mystery of the Everwood lights
on my desk by Monday morning.
You've got to be kidding me.
That's the deal. Take it or leave it.
Fine. I'll take it.
Alright. Tomorrow night, 1800 hours sharp.
-Good choice, Junior. -Yeah. As if I ever had one.
[PLAYING "MOONLIGHT SONATA" THIRD MOVEMENT ON PIANO]
[STUDENTS APPLAUD]
It's better, but not exactly up to snuff, Kate.
I'd log in some more rehearsal time
before tomorrow if I were you.
Speaking of which, I've made my decisions...
...on the playing order, so listen up.
Hank, Daniel, Evelyn...
...Afton, Chris, Laura...
...Kate.
And, Ephram, you're our anchor. Do us proud.
What did I tell you?
MATT: Laura, you wanna go next? LAURA: Okay.
[PLAYING CLASSICAL MUSIC ON PIANO]
-Bravo. Bravo. -Thank you.
Thank you. I'd like to thank the academy.
I'd like to thank Mama Joy's for supporting my fry habit.
I'd like to thank my teacher for taking a chance on a no-name.
Love to take the credit, but it's all you.
Well, I'm obviously a raw genius, but--
Don't forget humble.
But I'm not the best player, which begs the question:
Why'd I get the finale?
You want me to give it to someone else?
No, but Kate's obviously a better player.
Kate's terrific, but that comes from hours of practice
She has diligence, you have a gift.
Sucks for her, cool for you.
-It's that simple? -Such is life.
So, what are we gonna tackle next?
I gotta tell you, I'm not loving Schubert right now.
That won't be up to me.
Gonna let me to pick out my own music? Sweet, bring on the jazz.
Actually, I wasn't gonna tell you this until tomorrow...
...but this is our last lesson.
I got another job, Ephram.
I didn't even know you were looking. Well, when? Where?
A conservatory in London I applied to...
...is finally interested.
So I'm packing up and flying out of here.
Oh....
Happened kind of fast, eh?
I met the people in New York a few months ago.
It was just something I've been working on.
Anyway.
I guess Everwood can't compete with London, right?
Well, Madonna lives there for a reason.
Well, it's gonna suck losing one of the three people...
...I can carry on a conversation with.
That's why God invented e-mail.
Let's try that last chord progression one more time...
...and then you're free.
[PLAYING CLASSICAL MUSIC ON PIANO]
I know the perfect place where we can get the best view.
It's just past Miller's Field.
We should've the whole place to ourselves.
Grab that tent, would you?
-What's the plan for tonight? -Recon.
The first thing we gotta do is get a better look at the lights.
I packed my telescope. I thought we'd take pictures.
That's a great idea.
So how about you go on, do the telescope thing by yourself...
...and I will meet you later, take the pictures?
I'm better with a camera.
What do you mean, later? Where are you gonna be?
I thought I'd go help Colin on this test he's got on Monday.
I figured that you'd understand...
...because we know that me being grounded...
...is another one of my dad's lame power moves, right?
Amy, I suddenly feel like I'm being hornswoggled...
...and I don't like it one bit.
No, that's not how it is at all, Grandma.
You thought you could manipulate me into letting you see Colin.
This whole X-File reunion tour was just so you could use me.
I didn't use you, I need you. There's a difference.
Well, sell that to someone who buys malarkey.
Get in the truck.
You're seriously not gonna let me?
Seriously.
Can I call and tell him I'm not gonna make it?
-No. -Why not?
Grandma, I thought you understood me.
I thought I did too.
Fine, then take me home because--
Forget it.
We are going camping, we're gonna figure out those lights.
And we're gonna do it together whether you like it or not.
Truck.
[AMY SIGHS]
No, it's gonna be fine, Chuck. You have nothing to worry about.
You're in very, very good hands with Dr. Abbott.
-You're pulling all my hair out. -You do it sweetheart, okay?
So meet him at my office at 9:00...
...and I'll call you tomorrow afternoon...
...to see how it went, okay?
Alright, good luck.
Hey, you're looking sharp.
Is that Matt's present?
Yeah, I'll give it to him after.
-What'd you get him? -This old map of London.
It's cool-looking.
That's thoughtful. I'm sure, he'll appreciate it.
So you nervous?
Well, I had a couple belts of whiskey to take the edge off.
Good. I figured you might be nervous.
And I dropped those cups off at the concert hall for you.
Well, you've done a fine job with the cups.
Mom would be proud.
So how many people R.S.V.P.'d for this thing?
Is this a trick question?
Because you asked me to disinvite everyone yesterday...
...so I did.
-You did? Nobody else is coming? -I did what you told me.
You didn't want anyone to come. You told me. I've a witness.
Don't look at me, I'm working.
-No, I mean, it's no big deal. -Wait a minute, maybe we can--
No, it's fine. Forget it, really.
There's still time--
[CAR HORN HONKS]
It's Matt. I'll see you guys there.
I'm gonna get a ride with him, alright?
Come on, sweetheart. Let's go.
But the recital's not for another hour.
We've got plenty of time.
No, we don't. We gotta go find an audience.
Mother.
My God.
Mr. Dodd...
...it's difficult to conduct a sleep clinic
if you do not go to sleep.
-I'm trying, Dr. Abbott. -Well, what is it you need?
An Ambien? Some warm milk? Shall I recite Goodnight Moon?
I can't sleep without my Betsy.
Oh, you must be kidding.
CHUCK: I need Betsy.
If I don't have my arm around her, I can't sleep.
Do you have to have her next to you?
Doctor, I appreciate the offer, but I really need my wife.
No, I was offering you a pillow.
Fine, fine. Let's go find your Betsy.
AMY: Well, so much for having the whole place to ourselves.
MAN: Yeah. Okay.
AMY: Can I have some cocoa? -Sure. Knock yourself out.
AMY: Thanks. Ahem.
Sorry to bother you, but I was wondering...
...if you had some matches I could borrow.
My family's there. We're trying to start a campfire.
-Sure. -Yeah, sure.
Quite a night. I can't believe how many people turned out.
I guess we overestimated the apathy of the general public...
...where green men are concerned.
Wonderful, isn't it?
Nowadays I can't even get my kids together for a meal.
And then something like this comes along.
It is hard to get a family together these days.
WOMAN: Reminds me of my fourth abduction, in '79.
That's not right, um....
Maybe it was my third. It's so hard to keep track.
You have such pretty hair.
-Here's your matches. Keep them. -Thank you.
Well, so much for sleeping tonight.
Mm-hm.
She's right, though. Whatever those lights are...
...they brought all these people together tonight.
It's pretty impressive.
ANDY: Amy Abbott!
Did someone just call my name?
ANDY: Edna Harper!
We're being paged in the forest.
Dr. Brown?
Sorry to crash your mission, but I need to talk to Amy...
...for a second.
Is everything okay?
Ephram's piano recital's tonight and I'd like you to come.
I know he'd really like you to be there.
Well, he made it very clear...
...that he didn't want me there at all.
Well, I learned a very valuable lesson...
...which I am now going to impart to you.
Whatever he says about his piano recital...
...he means the exact opposite.
Well, I'd love to, but I promised my grandma
that I'd stay here tonight. It's kind of important.
It's okay, go on ahead.
Well, I don't wanna abandon you.
I can defend the universe from an alien invasion all by myself.
Okay, I'll come back right after the recital, I promise.
Just don't figure anything out without me.
Promise.
ANDY: Right over here. -Thanks.
-Thanks, Edna. -Sure.
WOMAN 1: The house opens in 10 minutes. Get ready.
WOMAN 2: Hi.
Have you seen Matt?
He's downstairs making a phone call.
This fortissimo is killing me. I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Matt?
[PLAYING CLASSICAL MUSIC ON PIANO]
[CROWD APPLAUDING]
Nice job, Ephram. You were amazing tonight.
Yeah, right.
I mean it. You really nailed the finale.
What's your problem? I'm just saying you did great.
Look, I get it, alright? I'm not an idiot.
What are you talking about?
Matt gave me that slot...
...because he didn't wanna blow his cover by giving it to you.
Your performance was awesome. You earned the finale.
-I don't need a pep talk. -I can't give you a compliment?
You wouldn't say two words to me.
Now you wanna be my best friend?
It's so obvious what you're doing.
Is that so?
Yes. Don't worry, I'm not gonna blow your cover.
People will figure out how naive you're without me.
You think I'm naive?
If you can't figure out why 28-year-old guys...
...date high-school girls, I can't help.
Matt and I are in love.
Oh, is that why he's dumping you for some lame-*** job in London?
You really don't get it, do you? Matt's not dumping me.
He's leaving town because my dad found out about us.
-What, he--? -Yeah.
But hey, I guess you believe everything Matt's ever told you.
Who's the naive one now?
[WHACKING]
HARRY: Sweet Betsy.
[GROANING]
Gotcha.
Mrs. Dodd. Mrs. Dodd.
For God's sake, woman, wake up.
[GROANS]
Why does it smell like beans out here?
I forgot the eggs.
So we're having huevos rancheros minus the huevos.
How was the recital?
I think I fell asleep before you got back.
It was awesome.
I really think Ephram's gonna be a famous piano player one day.
I mean, even bigger than Tori Amos or that guy from Shine.
Well, I'm glad you had a good time.
Yeah, and that's kind of what I don't get.
What do you mean?
Well, you're really mad at me when I wanted to go see Colin...
...but you had no problem with me going to see...
...Ephram's piano recital.
Is that your way of telling me that I chose the wrong bachelor?
No, I'm not trying to choose your boyfriends, Amy.
I'm just trying to keep you...
...from losing too much of yourself...
...while you figure it all out.
You and your dad are a lot alike.
You've both got tunnel vision like I've never seen.
You focus so intently on one thing...
...that you forget everything else around you.
And right now your tunnel leads to Colin and only to Colin.
-Yeah, but I-- -Love him. I know. I know.
I understand.
But there's a very fine line...
...between devotion and obsession.
Besides, Colin's not the only one who needs you.
Your dad does, I do.
And last night, more than anyone, Ephram did...
...and you were there for him.
And that's the kind of person you've always been.
And I just didn't want you to forget it.
So basically you're saying...
...that there's more to life than boys?
Well, if you wanna be succinct about it, sure.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
What is this?
-What? What are we looking at? -Moths. Look.
There's millions of them.
Aw, that's disgusting.
No. It's the answer.
Remember that article on the Internet...
...about how sometimes swarms of bugs...
...can get caught in some kind of electrical field and glow?
The article even said the bugs travel in a mass...
...so it looks like the shape of a UFO...
...which would explain all the alien theories.
-And totally disprove them. -Exactly. We did it.
I mean, it was kind of the article, but we did it.
Wait till I tell Irv.
I should have bet him two months' worth of foot rubs.
Wait, maybe we shouldn't tell Irv.
Or anybody. Maybe people would just be happier...
...thinking that there's still...
...something magical out there, you know?
You're on, sport.
[BOTH LAUGHING]
Nice job last night.
-That's all you got to say? -What more do you want?
Some honesty would be great.
-I am being honest. -No, you're not. You lied.
You lied to me, you lied to Kate.
All you had to do was tell me the truth.
-And why should I've? -I deserve it.
No, not where Kate and I are concerned.
When it came to the music, to what was important...
...I was honest with you.
Forget the music.
This has nothing to do with that. I trusted you.
I believed what you told me, not just about the piano...
...but about life, about people, everything.
I took your advice to heart 'cause I thought we're friends.
I'm your friend.
No, I'd not be friends with somebody like you.
You know what made you cool to hang out with?
-You didn't act your age. -How do you live with yourself?
-Don't worry about me. -I'm not.
I'm worried about Kate.
She has no idea what kind of person you're.
-And you do? -You're a liar.
Don't be so quick to judge me.
In 10 years you'll have done things...
...you never thought possible.
When you're there we'll compare notes.
Screw you.
You're a better pianist now than you were two months ago.
My job was to bring out your abilities.
That's what I was hired to do.
Is that what you were hired to do for Kate?
Hey. How'd it go with Chuck?
Ooh....
That well, huh?
What did I tell you about arguing with lumberjacks?
So Chuck wasn't the one with the sleep disorder.
Turns out it was Betsy.
Betsy did this to you? But she's so tiny.
Can we keep this conversation strictly medical?
Of course. So, what was your final diagnosis?
REM behavior disorder, a type of parasomnia...
...that involves odd or dangerous behavior during sleep.
People acting out their dreams.
Except in this case, Betsy was acting out her anger.
Chuck told her about going to Alaska.
She was upset, but instead of talking about it--
She beat the sleeping daylights out of him.
-Feisty little one, isn't she? -That's one word for her.
What did you prescribe?
A punching bag for Betsy, plenty of Tylenol for Chuck...
...and a promise that he will stay in town for the time being.
And as for myself...
...I am going back to my original medical regimen...
...which means staying as far away...
...from you as humanly possible.
DELIA: Dad, can I go to the video store...
...and see if they have E.T. back yet?
Honey, we rented that film three times this week.
DELIA: I told you we should buy it.
Okay, go ahead.
-Kate's father knows everything? -Well, supposedly.
Whether that's true or not, I have no idea, but....
I'm sorry you got caught up in the middle of all this.
I feel somehow responsible, seeing as I chose Matt for you.
Well, did it say "lying ***" on his resume?
Well, I guess I can't blame you for this one.
Well, you choose the next one.
We'll do a heavy screening process.
I don't want another piano teacher.
Why not? Just because Matt's a jerk, doesn't mean you have to--
It's more than that. You know, I don't know if it's worth it.
What are you talking about?
What's the point of becoming great...
...if you compromise everything you believe in?
-Who says you've to compromise? -Matt said--
Forget Matt. He doesn't know you.
He doesn't know what you're capable of.
And you're better than him.
You're a better pianist, and you're a better human being.
Am I better than you? You compromised. Think about it.
Would you have saved as many lives
if you were home for dinner every night?
Probably not.
And do you regret it now? Not being home?
You won't make the mistakes I did.
-You don't know that. -Yes, I do.
You're 15 years old, Ephram...
...and you're already asking yourself these questions.
It took me 20 years of neurosurgery...
...the death of your mother...
...and moving to the middle of nowhere...
...before I even knew what the questions were.
Now that you know what the questions are...
...can we please move back to New York?
Ha, ha. Nice try.
IRV: Despite our fascination with the beauty of stars...
...most people are uneducated...
...when it comes to the basic facts about the heavens.
Some mysteries aren't meant to be fully understood.
Some questions are best never answered.