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1. Thou shalt not impose your ambitions on thy child. Remember that swimming is your
child's activity. Improvements and progress occur at different
rates for each individual. Don't judge your child's progress based
on the performance of other athletes and don't push them based on what you think they should
be doing. The nice thing about swimming is people can strive
to do their personal best and benefit from the process of competitive
swimming. 2. Thou shalt be supportive no matter what.
There is only one question to ask your child after a practice or a
competition - "Did you have fun?" If meets and practices are not fun, your child should
not be forced to participate. 3. Thou shalt not coach thy child. You are
involved in one of the few youth sports programs that offer
professional coaching, do not undermine the professional coach by trying to coach your
child on the side. Your job is to provide unconditional love and support
and a safe place to return at the end of the day. Love and hug
your child no matter what. Tell them how proud of them you are. The coach is responsible
for the technical part of the job. You should not offer advice on technique
or race strategy or any other area that is not yours. And above
all, never pay your child for a performance. This will only serve to confuse your child
concerning the reasons to strive for excellence and weaken the swimmer/coach
bond. 4. Thou shalt only have positive things to
say at a swimming meet. If you are going to show up at a
swimming meet, you should be encouraging, but never criticize your child or the coach.
Both of them know when mistakes have been made. And remember “yelling
at” is not the same as “cheering for”. You also may want to
consider being positive anytime you are around the pool.
5. Thou shalt acknowledge thy child's fears. A first swimming meet, 500 free or 200 IM
can be a stressful situation. It is totally appropriate for your
child to be scared. Don't yell or belittle, just assure your child that the
coach would not have suggested the event if your child was not ready to compete in it.
Remember your job is to love and support your child through all of
the swimming experience. Most of their fears are one’s you have given
them. 6. Thou shalt not criticize the officials.
If you do not care to devote the time or do not have the desire to
volunteer as an official, don't criticize those who are doing the best they can. You
too can be trained to be an official in an afternoon.
7. Honor thy child's coach. The bond between coach and swimmer is a special one, and one
that contributes to your child's success as well as fun. Do not
criticize the coach in the presence of your child, it will only serve to hurt
your child's swimming. 8. Thou shalt be loyal and supportive of thy
team It is not wise for parents to take their swimmers and to jump
from team to team. The water isn't necessarily bluer in another team's pool. Every team has
its own internal problems, even teams that build champions.
Children who switch from team to team are often ostracized for a
long, long time by the teammates they leave behind and are slowly received by new team
mates. Often times swimmers who do switch teams never do better
than they did before they sought the bluer water.
9. Thy child shalt have goals besides winning. Most successful swimmers are those who have
learned to focus on the process and not the outcome.
Giving an honest effort regardless of what the outcome is, is much
more important than winning. One Olympian said, "My goal was to set a world record.
Well, I did that, but someone else did it too, just a little faster
than I did. I achieved my goal and I lost. Does this make me a failure?
No, in fact I am very proud of that swim." What a tremendous outlook to carry on through
life. 10. Thou shalt not expect thy child to become
an Olympian. There are 280,000 athletes in USA Swimming.
Only 2% of the swimmers listed in the 10 & Under age group make it to the Top 100 in the 17-18
age group and of those only a small percentage will become
elite level, world class athletes. There are only 52 spots available for
the Olympic Team every four years. Your child's odds of becoming an Olympian are about .0002%.
Swimming is much more than just the Olympics. Ask your coaches why they coach. Chances are,
they were not an Olympian, but still got so much out of
swimming that they wanted to pass the love for the sport on to others.
Swimming teaches self-discipline and sportsmanship; it builds self-esteem and fitness; it provides
lifelong friendships and much more. Most Olympians
will tell you that these intangibles far outweigh any medal they may
have won. Swimming builds good people, like you want your child to be, and you should
be happy your child wants to participate.