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There is something important that I’d like to tell you today,
but unfortunately I can’t…
Contest cheer, judges, dear toastmasters and friends.
I cannot tell you what I wanted to say because,
I have to admit it, I’m afraid of public speaking.
I’m one of those people who prefer swimming with sharks,
or even jumping from a plane with a parachute,
or without it,
before standing here and talking to all of you.
But I’m here, and there’s nothing I can do about it.
But, do you know what really terrifies me?
Speaking in a funeral, because it’s a very unfriendly public.
I understand why many people would prefer to be inside the coffin,
rather than say some goodbye words.
Sometimes, public speaking fear is greater than fear to death.
I remember the first time I had to speak in public.
Before I started to talk, I was already shaking,
and I was sweating everywhere in my body,
everywhere.
And I also felt like somebody was squeezing my stomach,
and that was inducing me to vomit,
but luckily that never happened.
Well I think it just happened once.
So, that’s why I’m so afraid of public speaking.
My fear is so much that sometimes when I’m in front of an audience,
I want the ground to swallow me up before I start to talk.
Or even better, an earthquake just before my presentation,
so everybody will run out and I could give my speech with calm and confidence,
without all those harassing gazes.
Well,
I think that’s not gonna happen today, so I better go on.
But wait a minute, one day it happened,
but for some reason my public didn’t feel the earthquake,
and I was the only one who ran out of the meeting room.
Now I’m starting to believe there were just my legs the ones who were shaking.
However, I’ve tried everything to overcome my fear.
One day I even tried to breathe deep before my presentation
in order to get calmed.
And I started like “hmhmhm”,
and I almost made it.
I started to feel so relaxed,
I started to internalize and forget about the world for a while.
But unfortunately, I also forgot what I was going to say.
Then a friend of mine told me
– I’m gonna share with you a trick that never fails,
you just have to imagine everyone in the public naked.
So I said – I’m gonna try.
And the first time I used this technique it was a disaster,
I felt like I was the one with no clothes
“why do people look at me like that?”
It doesn’t feel so good to be the center of attention.
But despite my first failure, I decided to try again,
and this is the second time I use this technique.
But don’t worry, not all of you are naked,
some of you are wearing pink circles underwear.
I don’t wanna say names,
but some of you even have a strange funny hat over your head…
you know a strange funny hat?
I imagine this because if I feel naked,
I want you to appear more ridiculous than me.
Of course I don’t want you to get angry,
but this is the only technique that has worked for me.
Well, actually, there’s something that has worked even better,
and it’s Toastmasters International.
Even thou some people say it’s like alcoholics anonymous meetings,
I still like toastmasters,
because here I have the opportunity to face my fear
and have fun at the same time.
And I can see you enjoy this too,
otherwise you wouldn’t be here listening to me.
But I just hope one thing,
that in this moment or in the future,
you do NOT imagine me on pink circles underwear,
unless of course, it makes you feel less nervous.
Ah, the important thing I wanted to say...
If you really wanna be a good communicator,
continue to practice as much as possible.
And if you have a fear, face it!
And never give up until you defeat it.