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She makes you look crazy. If you try to confront her about something she's done, she'll tell
you that you have "a very vivid imagination" (this is a phrase commonly used by abusers
of all sorts to invalidate your experience of their abuse) that you don't know what you're
talking about, or that she has no idea what you're talking about. She will claim not to
remember even very memorable events, flatly denying they ever happened, nor will she ever
acknowledge any possibility that she might have forgotten. This is an extremely aggressive
and exceptionally infuriating tactic called "gaslighting," common to abusers of all kinds.
Your perceptions of reality are continually undermined so that you end up without any
confidence in your intuition, your memory or your powers of reasoning. This makes you
a much better victim for the abuser. Narcissists gaslight routinely. The narcissist will either
insinuate or will tell you outright that you're unstable, otherwise you wouldn't believe such
ridiculous things or be so uncooperative. You're oversensitive. You're imagining things.
You're hysterical. You're completely unreasonable. You're over-reacting, like you always do.
She'll talk to you when you've calmed down and aren't so irrational. She may even characterize
you as being neurotic or psychotic. Once she's constructed these fantasies of your emotional
pathologies, she'll tell others about them, as always, presenting her smears as expressions
of concern and declaring her own helpless victim-hood. She didn't do anything. She has
no idea why you're so irrationally angry with her. You've hurt her terribly. She thinks
you may need psychotherapy. She loves you very much and would do anything to make you
happy, but she just doesn't know what to do. You keep pushing her away when all she wants
to do is help you.