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Now this is a story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down.
And I’d like to take a minute
Just SIT RIGHT THERE,
And I’ll tell you how I got sent to St. Pierre.
In Northwest Canada,
Born and raised,
In the igloo is where I spent most of my days,
Chillin’ out maxing, relaxin’ all cool.
Clubbing some seals at the edge of the pool.
When a couple of Kabluunaks who were up to no good,
Started takin’ oil from my neighborhood.
I got stripped of my rights and they made me get out of there.
They said: “You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle in St. Pierre.”
I begged and pleaded with them everyday,
But they sent their trucks and oiled anyway.
I left with nothing but the lint in my pocket,
But I got my parka and said “yo, better walk it.”
It wasn’t first class; yo it was bad.
I was going to a strange land, leaving everything I had.
What would I do for water, what would I do for food?
Hmmmmm, this would not be good.
I whistled for a sled and when it came near
The driver said mush, and we began to disappear
And felt the cold, harsh feels of the Canadian air.
When he asked ‘Where to?’, I said, Yo Holmes~ SAINT PIERRREEEE
I pulled up to the Igloo about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the driver 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked at the place
And I was freaking scared
To go live in the cold, desolate St. Pierre.
Uglu: Whatcha watching, old lady?
Aunt Melina: Hey, that’s no way to talk to your elders! I’m your aunt, boy.
Uglu: Fine... AUNT old lady.
Uglu: So what is it?
Aunt Melina: Huh?
Uglu: What is it?
Aunt Melina: You stupid or something?
It says NEWS in big letters across the top.
Uglu: Well maybs I didn’t see that, okay!??!
Aunt Melina: stupid...
WHAT!? NO!
Uglu: What?
Aunt Melina: They’re taking away our whaling rights!!! This is outrageous!
Uglu: Uhh... so? Whales are gross.
Melina: UGLU! WHALES HAVE BEEN PART OF INUIT CULTURE FOR
HUNDREDS OF YEARS!
Uglu: So? They’re still gross.
Melina: You’re eating whale right now!
Uglu: WHAT!!? I eat this everyday!
Melina: And that candle? It’s made out of whale blubber!
Uglu: What?!?!? But it smells so good...
Melina: That’s right! And that orange juice?
Uglu: NO! Not my orange juice!!!
Melina: Well actually, that’s made of oranges...
But you get the picture!
Uglu: We have to do something!
Melina: There’s nothing we can do, boy...
Those kabluunaks have all the power in the world.
Nothing we can do.
Uglu: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Melina: so stupid...
Hey: so stupid...
Melina: You’re so stupid, igloo!
Uglu: It’s Uglu -_-
Melina: Potato, potato... Nobody’s ever going to see that!
Hey: So stupid!
Uglu: You really think they won’t see my letter?
What should I do?
Melina: Well first you should do some research...
you don’t know anything about this at all!
Uglu: I see! How should I do that?
Hey: Well Uglu! You should watch this documentary!
It’s very informative.
Uglu: EW... Documentaries are gross... Besides, it’s like the early
1900s....
videos haven’t even been invented yet bro...
Where did you get this?
Hey: I know a guy. You should watch this.
Uglu: Fine...
Narrator: Hey, you are a scholar and the leading
expert on Inuit culture. Can you tell us some
things so we can understand better?
Hey: Of course!
Narrator: To what extent have the Inuit people of
North America been oppressed over the years?
Uglu: Are you... interviewing yourself?
Hey: Psh. No.
That guy has a British accent...
He’s clearly not me...
For years now, Inuit communities have been working
hard to fight the extinction of their culture.
From the mid 1800s, with the arrival of European whalers,
fur companies,
and missionaries,
and the Canadian government from the south,
non-natives increasingly claimed the land. As of now, the
International Whaling Committee (IWC) is pushing
to ban whaling. Whaling is important in
contemporary Inuit communities.
It provides us with food, tools, and other staples.
The arctic is full of oil, and Europeans are building
more and more oiling facilities. Something has to be done.
It is up to us.
Melina: Hey!
Hey: Yo bebe what’s good ;)
Melina: Where’s Uglu!
Hey: Oh he went over to the Mayor’s office to talk
to the Kablunaaks about the whales.
Melina: OH NO~ He is gonna get himself killed...
SO stupid!
Hey: Oh no! We need to get him! TO THE CHOPPER~
Melina: Hey stupid! Where is Uglu!
Hey: I don’t knowwww~~
Melina: What is that on da ground obba der!?
Hey: That looks like Uglu! And a Kabluunak!
Melina: Oh no! That Kablunaak has a gun Hey!
Hey: Oh no, HE’S SHOOTING AT US!
*Uglu watches helicopter falling from sky*
First you took my land
And then you took my oil
Then You took my whales
Then you took me from my home,
In northwest Canada, where I was born and raised...
In the Igloo where I spent most of my days.
And now, you killed my aunt and uncle.
(Lolz... Jun and Iao are married)
I will have my revenge.
Ka-me
Ha-me
*looks at camera...n00b*
HAAAAAAA
Die, Dirty Kabluunaks!
*He is being hit by his own explosion in case you did not realize that...*