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(Rufus) Hold that.
[clunk-a-clunk]
(Tyrone) Ouch!
(Tyrone) When are you going to get the trunk lid fixed on our car?
(Rufus) I may never get it fixed.
And it's not our car. It's my car.
I may just buy a whole new ride after this deal.
Recycle the old lead sled
back into the system from whence it came.
Know you could always just let me have it.
Like to sweeten my end of the deal a little bit.
You've got to learn to live within your means T.
That old rust bucket still gets by under it's own power
which makes it worth at least a hundred bucks.
I ain't just going to give it away.
Awe! Well remember, you promised me
one hundred bucks
to watch your back.
Yeah, I won't forget. I don't miss any details.
Yeah, you'll forget if it suits you.
I won't forget your hundred dollars.
Riding shotgun for you isn't the safest activity I can think of.
Look T, I've already done all the dirty work.
I located the goods and done the breaking and entering.
I acquired the merchandise and made the get- away.
All you got to do is be around during the transaction
so the buyer doesn't get any funny ideas.
Oh! So, that's the merchandise.
An old box.
It's not the box you welter-brain.
It's what's in the box.
What's in the box?
Houdini's Hand.
Say what!
Houdini's Hand.
Oh!
It's Houdini's old mummified hand.
You mean like! There's a real dead guy's hand in there?
Like from off that old dead magician?
Yeah. Somebody cut it off his body after he died.
Well! So what! Who'd even want some old dead thing like that?
Lots of people.
Awe! Lots and what would they do with it?
It's got uses.
Huh! What kind of uses?
Like, what uses?
It's dead!
I tell you I stole it off of Stumpy Nixon.
You mean that one-arm burglar down in Atlanta?
You stole that dead hand from Stumpy Nixon?
Yep! Sure did!
See he left it in his flat when he went to go visit his girlfriend.
So when I go pay him a visit,
I realize he's left his door unlocked.
So I just pop in and lift it.
He even left the bag for me to carry it off with.
You stole that hand off of a one-armed burglar?
Yeah!
I guess it left him a little
short-handed.
[laughing]
What was Stumpy Nixon using that dead hand for?
Well! I heard
he was using it to unlock doors and safes and stuff.
I'm telling you this thing is valuable to the right people.
How does he do it?
You know, like, how does Stumpy Nixon
use an old dead hand to open doors and safes?
Man, I don't know. He just does.
He inherited it from another old dude that was using it for the same thing.
Somehow they use it.
Have you see it?
What the hand?
Yes! The hand!
Have you seen the hand?
No. I haven't seen it.
It's in a Chinese trickster box.
You've got to slide a panel this way and that way.
It's like a puzzle.
Naw! Naw!
It's an ancient combination lock.
I used to try to figure these things out.
I'm going to call my fence, Al Sharko.
Man, this thing's worth ten kay. Easy.
[stomach gurgles]
(Al Sharko) Sharko's Body Shop.
Hey Al! Rufus!. How's it going?
What do you want Rufus?
I'm here with my mother.
Tell your mom I said hi.
My mother despises vermin like you.
What do you want?
Man, you're momma's hard.
Listen! I've got something you want.
I doubt it.
Really Al. I've managed to get my hands on something quite valuable.
Are you going to tell me what is before I die of old age?
Check this out.
I have in my possession
Houdini's Hand.
Are you talking about that thing that
Stumpy Nixon uses to open safes and stuff?
Yep. Picked it up right out of his flat.
Check this out, Stumpy Nixon left his door unlocked.
Stumpy Nixon always leaves his door unlocked.
It'd be a waste of time to lock his doors with that hand thing in there.
That's what I'm trying to tell you Al.
This thing opens stuff.
I figured you might know someone who wants it.
Stumpy Nixon might want it.
And you'll be lucky if he takes it back without a lot of trouble.
Man, I ain't afraid of that one armed safe cracker.
Well, you better be plenty worried.
Nobody messes with Stumpy Nixon.
Even the cops leave that guy alone.
A couple of years ago a detective got on his trail.
He woke up one morning with his nose lopped off.
Only a complete imbecile like you
would steal Stumpy Nixon's hand.
(Rufus) Yo T. How'd you open the box?
You know that bathroom doesn't have any toilet paper.
Left me stranded, high and dry.
(Rufus) The box T. How'd you open it?
Didn't touch it.
I was in the bathroom while you were talking to Al.
What's that stuff in the box?
Doesn't look like a hand to me.
Looks like rock-salt.
Yeah! That's exactly what it is.
It's rock-salt.
They put it in there to preserve the hand.
Yep! That's rock salt.
Get me that trash can and we'll put it in there.
No hand!
There isn't anything in that box but rock-salt.
[telephone ring]
Change your mind?
(Stumpy Nixon) You've got my hand!
Well! Did uh Al Sharko call you?
(Stumpy Nixon) No. Al Sharko didn't call.
You were trying to sell it to Al weren't you?
(Rufus)Well!
(Stumpy Nixon) You thought you could just steal my hand and sell it.
Didn't you?
Well to be perfectly honest with you Stumpy.
That's Mister Nixon to you.
(Stumpy Nixon) You've never been perfectly honest
with anyone in your whole miserable life.
(Stumpy Nixon) You've got my hand and I want it back,
with interest.
Ok Mister Nixon. I have what you're looking for.
What's it worth to you?
(Stumpy Nixon) What's it worth to me! Ha-ha! Ho-ho!
To be perfectly honest with you. Hah- hah!
I'll tell you what it's worth to you.
The way I see it, you took my hand.
I want my hand back
and now I want one of yours.
What? My hand?
You're crazy!
(Stumpy Nixon) You guys better seriously consider my offer.
And remember, I want my hand back and
I want one of yours in interest.
And listen Rufus,
I'm on my way over there to get it.
Who was that?
Was that Stumpy Nixon?
What's he want?
My hand.
He says he wants my hand in interest
for taking his.
How does he expect you to do that?
Saw off your own hand?
I guess so.
[TV blaring, people screaming]
You think the hand did that?
(Rufus) I don't know.
You know, it's out that box.
It's in this room somewhere.
(Rufus) I don't know T.
I don't think it could do something like that.
It's in here!
It just turned on that TV.
It's in here you know.
Come over here and help me move this out so we can look behind it.
Naw! naw! I'm good.
Don't be a wuss. Get over here, come on.
Ready on three. One, two, three.
Don't pick up your end or anything.
There's nothing back there but old dust bunnies the size of cats.
[phone ring]
(Stumpy Nixon) Tyrone Thaddeus.
So you're watching Rufus' back for a measly hundred bucks?
Yeah. How'd you know that?
(Stumpy Nixon) I know a lot Tyrone.
I know that after Rufus gets through settling up with me,
he's not going to have your measley hundred bucks.
Rufus is the one who's going to come up
short handed. Ha-ha! Ho-ho!
[locks rattle]
Hey Rufus!
That hand just locked us in.
(Rufus) Man, get out the way.
Move, get out the way.
How'd it do that?
The window!
The widow's all boarded up.
How are going to get out now?
We got a bag full of tools.
In cast you forget, remember,
we break into places for a living.
Oh yeah.
We can get out of here. Let's go.
Hey Rufus. Where's your crowbar?
I lost it. It fell off the roof of the Piggly-Wiggly behind the green room.
And you never got another one.
Never needed another one.
Till now.
Yeah! Till now.
(Stumpy Nixon) Hey! Hey! I know you hear me.
When you heisters going to stop messing around?
You need to get that hand ready for me
because I'm on my way over there to get it.
Ok.
Hey Rufus!
What'cha going to do with that saw?
I hope you're not thinking what I think you're thinking.
No! I'm not thinking what you think I'm thinking.
I know one thing, we need to figure a way to get out of this room before...
[phone clatter]
The hand! It's hanging around this table.
(Stumpy Nixon) Tyrone! Tyrone! Tyrone!
I know you hear me boy. Is that you boy?
Yes, this is I.
(Stumpy Nixon)I've got some good news Tyrone.
And I got some bad news.
The good news is I don't have my heart set on taking Rufus's hand.
That is some good news.
(Stumpy Nixon) Yep. And the bad news is your hand will also be satisfactory.
Oh! Oh! Why my hand?
(Stumpy Nixon) Well any hand will do as long as you crooks come off with a hand.
You're just fortunate I don't want your arm or your leg. Ha-ha! Ho-ho!
We've got to get out of here.
Looks like they screwed these boards on.
They're not prying off.
Oh! Oh!
[electricity surging]
[Rufus' brains boiling]
[amperage leaping from his ears]
Ga! Ga! Ga! Gag! [cough!]
Rufus! You nearly died.
You peed your pants and you nearly died.
[cough] It's that hand! It's trying to kill us. [cough]
It is! It is!
It just went back in its box.
Close the lid.
Get something out of this bag. Anything!
[telephone]
Huh? Huh!
Ah-Yah! Ooh!
[telephone]
I can't find anything.
Agh! Ooh! Agh!
Eee! Eee! [mortal whimpering]
We need a hand. For when Stumpy gets here.
Yeah!
We do!
[rusty door hinge]
I see you had a little run-in with my hand.
Uh huh!
Tell me Throne, what did you learn from all this?
Don't mess around with Stumpy Nixon?
Let me give you a little bit of advice, Tyrone.
Hanging out with big dummies like Rufus right there.
You going to end up just like Rufus.
Hey! Hey, Mr. Nixon! What'cha want me to do with this?
Ah yes, the interest on my property.
I don't think I'll be taking that today.
It's not my color, plus, it smells bad. Ha-ha! Ho-ho!
Hey!
Stumpy Nixon. You better tell somebody.