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Hey Babe, looking good!
Feeling good, Mercedes.
This is amazing.
Ever since glee club
won sectionals,
Everybody looks at us
differently.
I want to be
with you, Rachel.
We're glitterati.
I feel like Lady Gaga.
Get used to it, guys.
We're stars now.
On par with all
the jocks and popular kids.
Oh, it's the dawn of a new era
here at McKinley,
And we are gonna
rule this school!
Ooh-hoo, welcome to loser town.
Population: You.
(bell ringing)
I don't understand.
We won sectionals.
I completely demonstrated
the validity of this program.
Now you're
saying we have
To place at regionals
or the glee club's gone?
Shue, that was the deal
from the beginning.
I still have
a bottom line.
Those spotlights
in the auditorium
Don't run on dreams.
Our electricity consumption
is up two percent.
Besides, it's cold out,
Shue, and the Cheerios
Can no longer practice
out of doors!
They need the use of
the auditorium as well.
But the Cheerios
don't even have a coach.
Sue:
Oh, yes, they do.
Hey, buddy, you get a haircut?
Looks awful.
What are you doing here?
I'm just dropping off
a mocha for my maharishi.
I took the liberty
Of making it
a double whip.
Because after
our conciliatory dinner,
I happen to know
that there is nothing
You won't eat
whipped cream off of.
Would have gotten
you one, Will,
But, uh, I don't like you.
Okay.
Wait, what the hell
is going on here?
You suspended her
After she leaked
our set list at sectionals.
Yes, and the point of suspension
is reinstatement.
(typing on calculator)
(crowd cheering)
Finn:
In some ways, I'm happy
football season's over.
I did set the single-season
record for being sacked,
But we only won one game.
So, I'm hoping basketball
can be a fresh start.
(cheering)
The fact is,
I'm kind of depressed.
Hey, Finn.
Oh.
I made us his and her
relationship calendars.
That way, we always know
what the other is up to,
So you can't say
you forgot we had plans
When you miss
our dates anymore.
Great, but I'm kind of
allergic to cats, so...
I filled in all of our dates
for the next month.
On the sixth,
we're going to see Phantom
At the autistic
children's center.
Finn:
I know I saved glee club,
And I guess chicks dig me,
But I guess
if I'm being honest,
It's more like
I'm not over her.
Puck:
I'm not breaking up with you.
I'm just saying, please
stop super-sizing,
'cause... I don't
dig on fat chicks.
I'm pregnant.
And that's my fault?
Finn:
And Rachel--
Now that we're sort of dating,
I have to work
So much harder to pretend
to be listening to her.
That sounds great.
(whistle blows)
Sometimes I wish I could be
more like Coach Tanaka.
He pulled a Jessica Simpson.
You know, lost his fiancée,
gained 40 pounds
And stopped showering.
And everyone acts like
it's totally normal.
(whistle blows)
(buzzer sounds)
That's my boyfriend!
I'm off my game, and I don't
know how to get back on it.
Captioning sponsored by
20th century fox
And
toyota. Moving forward.
(bell ringing)
There.
You no longer confuse me
with your she-male looks.
I'm going to donate this to
the victims of Hurricane Katrina.
They can use it to plug
the holes in their trailers.
Sue.
Please tell me how
you managed to pull off
Getting reinstated.
Well, William,
I realized back
in my condo in Boca
That I had indeed
behaved poorly.
Riddled with remorse,
I arranged a dinner
So Figgins and I could have a
little professional sit-down.
Sue, there's no way I'm letting
you back into that school.
Mind flagging down that waiter?
We had a very frank
and healing discussion.
And you know what, Will?
It was like he was seeing me
and my moral integrity
For the very first time.
(siren wailing)
So here's what's going
to happen.
As of right now,
I am reinstated.
Or I will tell your wife
and the entire congregation
Of the Cornerstone
Bible Way Church
Of our *** congress.
It's your choice.
Smile.
Okay, look, Sue, if you're back,
let's bury the hatchet.
I won't be burying
any hatchets, William,
Unless I happen to get
a clear shot to your groin.
You humiliated me.
You did this to yourself, Sue.
All I did was
enjoy watching it happen.
Yeah, well, enjoy this, William.
Now that I am back
and my position is secured,
I will not stop
until you are fired,
And your little glee club is
annihilated into oblivion.
Bring it.
Oh, I will bring it, William.
You know what else
I'm gonna bring?
I'm going to bring some Asian
cookery to rub your head with.
'cause right now you got
enough product in your hair
To season a wok.
(sighs)
Hello.
Hello?
All (weakly):
Hello.
What do you guys say
when you answer the phone?
What up?
Who this be?
No, she's dead.
This is her son.
O-kay...
Alexander Graham Bell,
inventor of the telephone,
Liked to say "Ahoy, ahoy"
when he answered the phone.
It was edison
who decided that "Hello"
Was a more
appropriate greeting.
Look, I am really proud of
what you guys did at sectionals,
But as most of you
have realized by now,
It hasn't made
a bit of difference
In your day-to-day at school.
I have a slushee-stained
training bra to prove it.
The fact is, we're
gonna have to be better,
Even more spectacular,
at regionals.
It's time for
some reinvention,
Some new New Directions.
We need a new...
Hello.
Here's your assignment
for the week.
Come up with a fresh number,
but it has to have "Hello"
In the song title,
all right?
(bell ringing)
Hi.
Hi.
This is kind of
weird, isn't it?
Yes.
(laughs)
I mean, here we are.
We've been in this exact
situation a hundred times.
Only this time, I could just
Lean over and kiss you
if I want to.
And I want to.
No, hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
I'm sorry.
Um...
I just need to clean up first,
So I'll be right back.
Just hold on.
No, no, no, no.
Hey, Emma,
I don't care.
We've kissed before.
Yeah, but you caught me by
surprise sneak attack that time.
It was like a...
A pearly white harbor.
(laughs)
I'm sorry, this is a completely
unattractive quality.
You are adorable.
You're right, too.
We need to clean up a little
before we charge forward.
Get the monkeys off our backs.
Let's do this right.
We should go on a date.
Okay.
Get to know each other
as these...
New people,
not tied down by anyone.
My place.
I'll cook.
I didn't know you could cook.
There are so many things
you don't know about me.
And I can't wait
to introduce them all to you.
I'll see you later.
You two should be wetting
yourselves with shame.
Glee club won sectionals,
and you did nothing to stop it.
If you were samurai,
And my letter opener
were sharp enough,
I would ask you both right now
To commit seppuku.
In japanese, this means
ritual belly-slitting.
We were seduced by the glitz
and glamour of show biz.
Let me drop
some knowledge on you.
Ever since Quinn Fabray
got knocked up,
I've been in the market
for a new head cheerleader.
If you want the job
and back in my good graces,
You're gonna have
to turn around
And listen up.
You're familiar with a little
glee clubber named Rachel Berry?
Rachel's the
kind of girl
Who wants things too badly.
And what she really wants
is one Finn Hudson.
I want you to
go after him.
She'll go crazy.
She won't be able
to stand your dating him.
Humiliated, shamed,
She'll have no choice
but to leave the group.
And without her,
Schuester won't make it
to regionals.
(bell ringing)
I know it's been *** you
Since the baby drama.
Trust me, I get it,
and it sucks.
You seem to be
handling it fine.
Well, it's because
I realized that
I had to find this new
person inside of me,
The one that was okay
with what happened.
I just feel so bad
about myself.
Finn, that guy who made
all those bad choices,
Who ignored the signs,
he's gone.
This new, more experienced,
more interesting guy is here.
And I brought you here
to introduce you to him.
Help you move forward.
Oh, you mean like,
meeting other girls?
Because I think
I'm dating Rachel.
At least she sure
thinks I am.
No, it's not about
meeting someone else.
It's about being okay
just being you.
Come on, you're
a rock star, Finn.
You're like
Jagger, Morrison.
Yeah, yeah, I like that.
Good. I want you to meet
The new and improved
Finn Hudson
By singing about it.
Oh, that's why
the band's here.
Yeah. Pick a song, and
they're ready to back you up.
Well, I like what you said
about me being like Morrison.
And The Doors
have a "Hello" song.
So maybe I could find myself
And do my glee assignment
at the same time.
All right, man,
go to work.
(band playing
"Hello, I Love You")
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Won't you tell me your name? ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Let me jump in your game. ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Won't you tell me your name? ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Let me jump in your game. ¶
¶ She's walking
down the street ¶
¶ Blind to every eye she meets. ¶
¶ Do you think ¶
¶ You'll be the guy ¶
¶ To make ¶
¶ The queen
of the angels sigh? ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Won't you tell me your name? ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Let me jump in your game. ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Won't you tell me your name? ¶
¶ Hello, I love you ¶
¶ Let me jump in your game ¶
¶ Sidewalk crouches
at her feet ¶
¶ Like a dog that begs
for something sweet. ¶
¶ Do you hope to make her see,
you fool? ¶
¶ Do you hope to pluck
this dusky jewel? ¶
¶ Hello ¶
¶ Hello ¶
¶ Hello ¶
¶ Hello ¶
¶ I want you. ¶
¶ I need my baby. ¶
¶ Hello ¶
¶ Hello. ¶
(music ends,
cheering and applause)
And that, fellow glee clubbers,
is how we say hello.
(bell ringing)
Mr. Schuester,
I'd like to run some of
my "Hello" ideas by you.
You're a really good dancer.
Thanks, but my feet
weren't really moving.
That was the best part.
Oh.
Brit and I were wondering
if you wanted to go out.
On a... Date?
With which one of you?
- With both of us.
- With both of us.
Breadstix, 8:00.
Table for three?
Cool.
(giggles)
What did they want?
Oh, nothing.
Just the time.
I know being my boyfriend
is a challenge.
I'm not Quinn.
I don't look like her.
I'm not popular,
and my personality,
Though exciting and
full of surprises,
Isn't exactly
low-maintenance, but...
I'll always be honest with you.
Painfully so.
And all I ask in return
Is that you're just honest
with me.
I don't think I want
to be your boyfriend.
What?
Look, Rachel,
you're really awesome,
But I think I need to connect
with my inner rock star
Before I can fully commit
to one woman.
I need to find out who I am now.
I'll tell you who you are.
You're a scared little boy.
You're afraid of dating me
Because you think it might
hurt your reputation--
Though, which you'd
never admit it,
Is very important to you.
You hate what Quinn did to you,
Not just because it hurt,
But because it was
so humiliating.
You're freaking me out.
It's like you're inside
my head right now.
I just see you for who you are.
Unlike you, who can only see me
as this silly girl
Who made a fool out of herself
In her first glee club
rehearsal.
And that's where you lose, Finn.
Because, if you take
a second look at me,
You'd realize that I'm
the only person in your life
Who knows you and accepts you
for who you are, no matter what.
(bell ringing)
Finn:
Well, obviously,
Hawaiian pizza's the best
Because it's got ham and
pineapple on it, right?
True.
Mm-hmm.
So, it's better than most
pizzas because it has...
Will:
All right, guys,
you got to get moving
On those "Hello" numbers.
Who has got something
to show us?
Volunteers?
Mr. Schuester,
I think I found a song
That sums up my feelings
perfectly.
Fantastic, Rachel.
Show us what you got.
(playing "Gives You Hell")
¶ I wake up every evening ¶
¶ With a big smile on my face ¶
¶ And it never feels
out of place. ¶
¶ When you see my face,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ Now, where's your
picket fence, love? ¶
¶ And where's that shiny car? ¶
¶ And did it ever get you far? ¶
¶ You never seemed
so tense, love. ¶
¶ I've never seen you
fall so hard. ¶
¶ Do you know where you are? ¶
¶ And truth be told,
I miss you. ¶
¶ And truth be told, I'm lying. ¶
¶ When you see my face,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ When you walk my way,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ If you find a man ¶
¶ That's worth a damn
and treats you well ¶
¶ Treats you well ¶
¶ Then he's a fool ¶
¶ You're just as well ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ Now, you'll never see ¶
¶ What you've done to me. ¶
¶ You can take back
your memories. ¶
¶ They're no good to me. ¶
¶ And here's all your lies. ¶
¶ You can look me in the eyes ¶
¶ With the sad, sad look ¶
¶ That you wear so well. ¶
All:
¶ When you see my face,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ When you walk my way,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ If you find a man
that's worth a damn ¶
¶ And treats you well ¶
¶ Treats you well ¶
¶ Then he's a fool,
you're just as well ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ When you see my face,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ When you walk my way,
hope it gives you hell ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ When you hear this song
and sing along ¶
¶ Well, you'll never tell. ¶
¶ Never tell. ¶
¶ Then you're the fool,
I'm just as well ¶
¶ Hope it gives you hell. ¶
¶ Gives you hell. ¶
¶ When you hear this song ¶
¶ I hope that it
will give you hell. ¶
¶ Give you hell. ¶
¶ You can sing along ¶
¶ I hope that
it will treat you well. ¶
Will:
Guys, guys, guys.
I don't want to
be a buzz-kill,
But the assignment was "Hello."
I'm sorry. I was just focusing
on the first syllable.
Will:
You know what?
I don't think
you guys understand
The seriousness
of what we're up against.
While we were busy
winning our sectional,
Vocal Adrenaline
was busy winning theirs.
They're last year's
national champions.
They haven't lost a
competition in three years.
This is the big leagues, guys.
If we don't place at regionals,
glee club is over.
Lionel Richie, huh?
One of my favorites.
Oh, my god,
you're Jessie St. James.
You're in Vocal Adrenaline.
And you're Rachel Berry.
I saw you perform
at sectionals.
Your rendition of "Don't Rain
on My Parade" was flawed.
You totally lacked
Barbra's emotional depth.
But you're talented.
This is one of my
favorite haunts.
I like to come and flip through
the celebrity biographies.
Pick up some lifestyle tips.
I'm a senior now, so this
year's kind of my victory lap.
Snagging a fourth consecutive
national championship
Would just be gravy.
I'm getting out
of Ohio soon.
I've got a full ride
to a little school
Called the University
of California Los Angeles.
Maybe you've heard of it.
It's in Los Angeles.
What do you say we take it
for a spin?
Here?
Oh, no, I-I-I'm kind of nervous.
(sighs)
I remember
when I used to get nervous.
Come on. I do this
all the time.
I like to give impromptu
concerts for the homeless.
It's so important to give back.
(playing piano intro to "Hello")
¶ I've been alone ¶
¶ With you inside my mind. ¶
¶ And in my dreams,
I've kissed your lips ¶
¶ A thousand times. ¶
¶ I sometimes see you pass ¶
¶ Outside my door. ¶
¶ Hello. ¶
¶ Is it me you're looking for? ¶
Both:
¶ I can see it in your eyes. ¶
¶ I can see it in your smile. ¶
¶ You're all I've ever wanted ¶
¶ And my arms are open wide. ¶
¶ 'Cause you know
just what to say. ¶
¶ And you know just what to do. ¶
¶ And I want to tell you
so much. ¶
¶ I love you. ¶
¶ Oh, yeah. ¶
¶ I long to see the sunlight ¶
¶ In your hair. ¶
¶ And tell you
time and time again ¶
¶ How much I care. ¶
Both:
¶ Sometimes I feel my heart ¶
¶ Will overflow. ¶
¶ Hello. ¶
¶ I've just got
to let you know. ¶
¶ 'Cause I wonder
where you are. ¶
¶ And I wonder what you do ¶
¶ I wonder what you do. ¶
¶ Are you somewhere
feeling lonely? ¶
¶ Or is someone loving you? ¶
¶ Tell me how
to win your heart ¶
¶ For I haven't got a clue. ¶
¶ But let me start by saying ¶
¶ I love you. ¶
(music stops)
(applause)
We should do this
more often.
How's Friday night?
Excuse me.
We'd like to send these back.
But you ate all of it.
Look, I'm pretty sure
you have to do what we say.
And this food
Was not satisfactory.
There was a
mouse in mine.
So, we'd like more, please.
All right, hottest guys
in the school.
Go.
Okay, um, Puck's
super-fine.
Mm-hmm.
Finn's cute, too.
Yeah, but he's
not hot, though.
He really isn't.
And you know what, Brit?
I think that dwarf
girlfriend of his
Is dragging down
his rep.
I mean,
if he were dating,
Say, popular pretty girls
like us,
He would go
from dumpy to smokin'.
Finn:
Hello?
Hey, I'm right here.
Would you guys mind,
Like, including me
in your conversations?
I'll just give you
an introduction
Into the way
that we work.
You buy us dinner and
we make out in front of you.
It's like
the best deal ever.
Did you see what Rachel
was wearing today?
I know.
She looked
like Pippi Longstocking,
But, like, Israeli.
Those sweaters make her
look homeschooled.
(laughing)
Hey, guys, come on.
Don't make fun of Rachel.
She's... She's kind of cool.
Finn, that's mean.
You know what, actually?
Would you mind
Waiting in the car?
And leave
your credit card.
Did you know that dolphins
are just gay sharks?
Yeah.
Neil diamond:
¶ Hello again. ¶
¶ Hello. ¶
(will joins in):
¶ Just called to say ¶
¶ Hello. ¶
¶ I couldn't sleep ¶
¶ At all tonight ¶
¶ And I know it's late ¶
¶ But I couldn't wait... ¶
This is the perfect
song for us.
See, he's known this girl
for so long,
But they've just
been friends,
And now he's calling her up
to tell her he wants more.
I was sort of inspired
By my "Hello" assignment
with the kids.
Well, I love it.
Yeah?
I love it.
You do?
(both laughing)
Oh...
I don't know why, but...
I always had a soft spot
for this song.
¶ You're there at home. ¶
¶ Hello. ¶
¶ Maybe it's been crazy ¶
¶ And maybe I'm to blame ¶
¶ But I put my heart
above my head... ¶
Too much too fast.
Too much too fast.
You smell great,
your teeth are clean...
You're very sweet.
It's not that. I'm...
I just haven't been,
uh... Intimate
In a very, very long time.
How long?
Ever.
¶ My friend, hello... ¶
I just haven't found
the right person.
You know, someone
who won't reject me
When things get really hard
with my, um, with my problems.
It-it's cool.
It's not.
It's not cool.
I can tell.
No, no, no.
Emma...
I understand.
I'll pop in a movie.
Do we have to watch
Armageddon again?
Uh, it's that or Bad Boys.
They're the only DVDs
that Terri left behind.
She liked to have Bruckheimer
night every other week.
Okay, okay.
(clears throat)
¶ Hello. ¶
(explosions and gunfire on tv)
Finn:
Hey, Rach, can we talk?
Look, I want
to apologize.
I realized I don't want
to date other girls.
Only you.
You do talk too much,
And usually you're just
talking about yourself,
But at least I don't feel
alone when I'm with you.
I'm glad you've come
to that realization,
But you're too late.
I've met someone else--
A boy who's finally worthy
of my talent and love.
Whoa, whoa, wait.
Do I know him?
Is he, is he bigger than me?
Oh, he doesn't go to this
school, and he's a senior.
His name is Jessie, and he's
the male lead in Vocal Adrenaline.
We're both aware that our
Romeo-and-Juliet romance
Will be a challenge,
but our deep respect
For each other's talent
will carry us through.
Rachel, don't you think
that's kind of suspicious?
We make it to regionals
and suddenly
The top guy in our main
competition picks you up?
I know it's hard to believe
that anyone would like me
Without an ulterior motive,
but you have to respect
That our love is real.
Move on, Finn.
I finally have.
Mr. Shue... We have a problem.
Finn didn't fall
for any of our tricks.
Such as?
I didn't wear a bra,
And I had them turn up
the air conditioning.
Ladies, I misjudged you.
You may be two of the stupidest
teens I've ever encountered.
And that's saying something.
I once taught a cheerleading
seminar to a young Sarah Palin.
Wait, we did find out
Rachel's with some dude
from Vocal Adrenaline.
Name?
Jessie St. James.
Ooh, bringing down this club
may be easier than I thought.
I'm engorged
with venom and triumph.
Now get the hell
out of my office.
("Highway to Hell" playing)
¶ livin' easy, livin' free ¶
¶ a season ticket
on a one-way ride ¶
¶ goin' down, party town ¶
¶ my friends
are gonna be there, too ¶
¶ I'm on the ¶
¶ highway to hell ¶
¶ I'm on a highway ¶
¶ highway to hell ¶
¶ I'm on a highway to hell ¶
¶ I'm on a highway to hell ¶
¶ I'm on it, I'm on it ¶
¶ highway to hell... ¶
¶ don't stop me ¶
¶ oh, yeah! ¶
(music ends, flames whooshing)
Stop please.
Dear god, just stop.
Seriously, guys,
It's like watching
beige paint dry.
Could everyone
please look at jessie?
Jessie, give us a show face.
That's a show face, guys.
You want to look
so talented,
It's literally hurting you.
I want a look
that's so optimistic,
It could cure cancer.
That's what I'm talking about.
Take five, everybody.
Drink a red bull.
Excuse me,
ms. Corcoran?
Hi, I'm will schuester.
Sorry, I don't know
who you are.
I'm a big fan, really.
I also coach
the mckinley glee club.
I don't usually
cotton too well
To my competition sneaking in
to watch a rehearsal.
But I also have trouble
seeing you guys as competition.
I believe you have a student
named jessie st. James?
Yeah, I think he might be
dating one of my students.
I'm more than a little concerned
With the whole fraternizing
with the enemy aspect
Of their relationship.
You think we're
spying on you?
Honestly?
Yes.
Noted.
Look, I don't stand
For any funny business,
and jessie's a good kid.
I mean, what
can you do?
The heart wants
what the heart wants.
Sometimes there's
that little spark.
I'm not interested
in coaching
Just your average
high school glee club.
I'm driven to excellence.
Yeah, excellence.
A lot of people thought
I couldn't take nationals
With a routine where the kids
dance entirely on their hands.
(both panting)
Okay... I'm sorry.
We have to stop.
I...
I just can't do this.
Aw, I'm sorry.
I'm all business;
I'm trying to work on that.
No, it isn't that.
Are you gay?
What?
No.
Because most of the
show choir directors
I make out with are gay.
I spend
every waking moment
Thinking about vocal adrenaline.
I have no life.
I haven't been on a date
in three years.
Here you go.
Thanks.
I did lie
to you earlier.
I do know who you are.
I saw you
at our fall invitational.
I thought you were really cute.
(chuckles)
You know, I know what you mean--
about being obsessed with work.
I'm so committed
to the glee club,
And I think it played a big part
in ending my marriage.
How long have you been divorced?
Um... Well,
I'm not really divorced yet.
And then I-I
started dating
Someone I-I really care about,
But it isn't working
for some reason.
Oh, you're already seeing
someone else
And you were just
making out with me.
I'm kind of a mess.
Look, I don't want to tell you
how to live your life...
Please, be my guest.
I think you need
to take some time
To reintroduce yourself
to yourself.
You just finished
being somebody's husband,
And that didn't really work out.
And now you're running off to be
Somebody's
boyfriend?
Seems to me you need
to take a little breather.
Look,
That hair, that dimple,
That Terrible clunker
you drive--
I think you're about the
cutest thing I've ever seen.
Here's my number.
When you get things sorted out,
give me a call.
Thank you
for the coffee.
And the making out--
kind of hot.
(bell ringing)
Hey, guys.
Cut the butter,
benedict arnold.
We heard
about your new boyfriend.
Look, rachel,
We're all happy
that you're happy,
But we've worked too hard
in glee club
To let you throw it all away
on a relationship
That might not
even be real.
Why, 'cause he's
in vocal adrenaline?
Their motto is
"aut neca aut necatus eris."
Which loosely translates
to "*** or be murdered."
They give their dancers
human growth hormone.
Look, we're
not saying
The dude is playing you.
He's playing you.
We just think that until
regionals are over,
We can't risk the
possibility that he is.
None of us want
to go through
What happened
at sectionals again.
Okay, look, jessie and I
might not be true love,
But what if we are?
I know who I am.
And how many chances at this
am I going to get?
If you don't break up
with him, you're out.
You can't kick me out!
But we can all quit
if mr. Shue doesn't.
Well, good luck winning
without me.
Everyone is replaceable,
even you.
How could you do this to me?
How could you
do this to us?
We're a team, and
All you've ever wanted was
for us to be great,
And be a part
of something special.
Now is that still true or not?
(bell ringing)
You wanted to see me,
coach sylvester?
I did, rachel.
I want to introduce you
To the mckinley high
old maids club.
Woman:
Have a seat,
Boy hips.
I don't understand.
Well, rachel, it's
come to my attention
That you've been
given the old heave-ho
By that Terribly
uncoordinated Finn hudson.
Ouch.
And I also
understand
You have a serious suitor
in the form a piping hot
Hunkwad from
another district,
But that your fellow
Glee clubbers are so incensed
with betrayal,
They barely have time
to apply freeze off
To the clusters of warts
between their knuckles.
How did you know that?
Brit and I told everybody
in glee club
About jessie st. James.
They're furious.
If rachel falls for him,
the club will self-destruct.
Outstanding.
On to step two.
Round up a bunch of
mustache-sporting teenage girls
With glandular conditions.
Anything else?
Sometimes
I forget my middle name.
I know how torn
you must be, berry.
My freshman year,
I fell for a boy on an
opposing wrestling squad,
But my team
wouldn't go for it.
So, the next time
I stepped onto the mat,
I pinned him so hard,
it ruptured his ***,
Ending his run for
The state championship
And my run for his heart.
To my team,
I was a legend.
But I relished this
victory in solitude.
Now,
I spend my Friday nights
Making out with my cat
And watching
ghost whisperer.
Sue:
Well, rachel,
If I weren't ignoring
What these ladies were saying
Out of an overwhelming sense
of deep repulsion,
I would probably hear them
encouraging you
To go for it
with your carmel high beau.
Or you might end up like
Dottie here, who,
although her father offered
A sizeable dowry,
which included livestock,
Still couldn't get a date
to homecoming.
No homecoming?
Sue:
No valentines,
no sock hop.
Rachel, you need
to become even more narcissistic
And self-centered
than you already are.
Think of yourself--
your potential happiness.
If not,
Join the club.
(door closing)
Terri:
Beautiful table.
Meticulous, really.
I guess being crazy
has its benefits.
It's date night.
Actually, it was tomorrow,
But will wanted tonight,
so, I'm surprising him.
And I know
He keeps a key under the mat.
You're really loving this,
aren't you?
I take no pleasure
in your pain, Terri.
But I am enjoying
Seeing will get a second chance
at happiness, yes.
Oh, and you're the one
to introduce him
To this magical new world
of bliss?
What, you with your
three-times-a-day showers
And the fact
that you can't sleep
Unless your shoes are all
in a row?
Is there a reason
that you're here?
'cause I'd kind of like you
to be gone when will gets home.
I just need to pick up the rest
of my bruckheimer dvds.
Whose is this?
That's mine.
I got really tired of watching
con air every night.
And will picked "hello"
as our song.
Oh, you poor girl.
Don't bother sleeping
with my husband tonight.
You're already
screwed.
"hello" was our prom song.
I mean, I doubt will remembers.
He goes to the market for milk,
comes home with a pack of gum.
You're lying.
Ask him.
Or better yet,
go to the library
And look it up for yourself
in that year's thunderclap.
(spoon clinks)
Sorry.
Jessie?
Who's there?
I carry a *** whistle.
Just me.
(sighs)
Most spots are 2,500 watts.
This one is ten
times brighter.
We have to wear sunscreen
onstage, but it's worth it.
I guess everything is bigger
and brighter here.
(chuckles)
I have to ask you something.
And I need you
to tell me the truth,
Because if you don't,
there will be consequences--
Life-and-death consequences.
Because if I give myself to you,
And it turns out
that you're just playing me,
I might die.
Okay, okay, not literally,
but emotionally.
It'll be the kind of heartbreak
that girls like me hold
For the rest of their lives,
like barbra in the way we were.
(laughing):
Oh, my god.
What?
You're more of a drama queen
than I am.
Hi.
I'm jessie.
I know who you are.
You know jessie st. James,
The star of vocal adrenaline,
your competition at regionals.
I want to introduce
you to jessie,
The guy who's
nuts about you,
The guy who would
never hurt you.
(sighs)
- No one can know.
- I understand.
(bell ringing)
hi.
Hey.
I get home
last night, and
It was like some
ghost had laid out
This beautiful,
romantic meal for me.
A ghost who wears
your perfume.
I was just in the library.
Page 42.
Okay.
Oh, my... My junior prom.
I wanted to surprise you
on Wednesday.
Terri came by and, um,
Told me about the prom...
About the song.
Emma, I-I have no feelings
about this night anymore.
I didn't even remember the song.
No. I know.
I know, not consciously.
But somewhere inside,
You're still not over her.
We were naive.
I think sometimes we spend
So much time with these kids
that we start acting like them.
You've been
in the same relationship
Your entire life.
You don't know
who you are alone.
I think this song is just
The beginning of you
repeating the same patterns.
Terri and I met
when I was 15.
I'm a different person now.
How is you compromising yourself
For my crazy any different
than you doing it for hers?
Well... What do
you want to do?
I think that...
...You need to spend
some time alone.
I do. I think you need
to get to know yourself.
You know, you haven't been okay
With having your own needs
since you were 15.
You're right.
I guess...
I'm just not good
at being alone...
And realizing what
my own needs are.
Well, maybe around the time that
you figure out what they are...
Maybe I'll be ready
to get a little messy.
Can you go now?
I think I need
to close the door and cry.
(laughs)
(clears throat)
(sighs)
(crying softly, bell ringing)
Hey.
I ended it with jessie.
You can spread the word.
I know you know how to do that.
Look, I'm sorry, uh...
Look, I know
this really sucks for you
But I think it's for the best.
Taking one for the team.
I get it.
No, not just for the team.
For us.
You and me.
I've been thinking a lot lately.
I feel like I have
All these problems, you know,
With quinn and-and basketball
and girls and stuff,
And I've been so overwhelmed
Trying to figure them all out.
Then I realized the only thing
I needed to fix was us.
I want us to be together,
rachel.
A real couple.
Look, I even circled some dates
on your crazy calendar.
Is you not being able
to talk right now
A good thing or a bad thing?
I can't.
Can't what?
I-I can't be a couple with you.
It's the team.
We-we can't have any,
um, drama right now.
You know, we need... We need
to focus on regionals.
And I appreciate your offer,
But in the spirit
of being a team player,
I have to decline.
Hey, whoa.
(laughs)
I'm not just some guy
that you met at the music store
That you can just blow off.
I don't give up that easy.
See you at rehearsal.
¶ you say "yes" ¶
¶ I say "no" ¶
¶ you say "stop" ¶
¶ you say "stop" ¶
¶ I say "go, go, go" ¶
¶ oh, no ¶
¶ you say "good-bye" ¶
¶ and I say "hello" ¶
¶ hello, hello ¶
¶ I don't know why
you say "good-bye" ¶
¶ I say "hello" ¶
¶ hello ¶
¶ hello, hello ¶
¶ hello ¶
¶ I don't know why ¶
¶ you say "good-bye,"
I say "hello" ¶
¶ you say "yes" ¶
¶ I say "yes" ¶
¶ I say "no" ¶
¶ maybe, no ¶
¶ you say "stop" ¶
¶ I can stay... ¶
¶ I say "go" ¶
¶ "go, go" ¶
¶ oh, no ¶
¶ you say "good-bye" ¶
¶ and I say "hello" ¶
¶ hello, hello ¶
¶ I don't know why
you say "good-bye" ¶
¶ I say "hello" ¶
¶ hello, hello ¶
¶ hello ¶
¶ I don't know why
you say "good-bye" ¶
¶ I say "hello" ¶
¶ hello ¶
¶ hello, hello ¶
¶ hello ¶
¶ I don't know why
you say "good-bye" ¶
¶ I say "hello" ¶
¶ hello, hello ¶
¶ hello ¶
¶ hello... ¶