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[FLAT TONE]
Hey, man.
Look, I wanted to take a few moments to talk to you about a
subject that's very important to me, man--
honesty.
OK, look, recently an acquaintance of mine gave me
an important document mapping out the locations of some very
sensitive materials in the Covington, Kentucky area.
OK?
Look--
however, the map proved to be dishonest because when I want
to find the thumbdri--
the sensitive materials in question-- they like--
they weren't there, man.
You know, like Gondor.
OK, so I believe one of two things happened.
Either my acquaintance F'ed me in the A and sent me on a wild
carrion bird chase, which would only hasten his
inevitable demise.
Or a recent windstorm dislodged said materials from
various rooftops and trees, scattering them to the ground
where some Covingtonian bottom feeders
probably yorked them all.
OK, so back to honesty.
Look, if you found something in an alley that's all purple
and shaped like a suppository, or maybe more like, you know,
Spock's coffin in Wrath of Kahn, and it wasn't yours,
please don't plug it into your computer and download
anything from it.
I mean--
and don't put it on eBay pretending it's yours for some
other people to download and share and stuff.
OK?
I mean, ***, as I'm telling you this, there are probably
stupid people searching eBay for key words like
Snatchbuckler and Peopleburg and Wrath of Khan.
Look, whatever.
Look, it's very sensitive stuff, man.
I mean, come on.
WT-***, man?
Be honest!
Just-- just send it back to me!
***, man!
[FLAT TONE]