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PREVIEW VOICE-OVER: THIS SUMMER,
SPEED MCCOOL WILL MEET HIS TOUGHEST CHALLENGE YET...
STOP RIGHT THERE
AND FINISH THOSE SNACKS!
VOICE-OVER: AS A PRESCHOOL PAROLE OFFICER!
I MADE DOODIES.
VOICE-OVER: IT'S THE FUNNIEST,
MOST EXCITING THRILL RIDE OF THE YEAR!
AS SPEED TAKES ON NINJAS...
SPEED MCCOOL AND NINJAS: (GRUNTS OF EFFORT)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WOO HOO! YEAH!
VOICE-OVER: A ROGUE COP BENT ON REVENGE...
ROGUE COP AND SPEED MCCOOL: (GRUNTS OF EFFORT)
VOICE-OVER: AND A MOB OF TURBO TODDLERS!
PRESCHOOLERS: (SCREAMING)
HEY! BACK OFF!
THIS ISN'T IN MY CONTRACT!
HEY!
VOICE-OVER: IT'S THE BEST MOVIE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD.
EVER!
WE GOTTA SEE THAT MOVIE!
CROWD: (BOOING)
I'M A DOG NOT A GOAT,
BUT THAT MOVIE WAS BAAAAAAD.
SPEED MCCOOL IN A COMEDY?
WHY DID WE GO SEE THAT?
'CAUSE THE GUY IN THE TV COMMERCIAL
SAID IT WAS THE...
(MIMICS PREVIEW VOICE-OVER) "FUNNIEST, MOST EXCITING
THRILL RIDE OF THE YEAR!"
HEY, THAT WAS PRETTY GOOD.
FACE IT, A GREAT VOICE-OVER
CAN MAKE THE MOST BORING OF THINGS
(VOICE-OVER VOICE) SOUND MORE EXCITING THAN EVER!
(VOICE-OVER VOICE) WHAT SEEMED LIKE AN ORDINARY VEGETABLE
WAS ABOUT TO GIVE JOHNNY SUPER STRENGTH
AND RAZOR-SHARP VISION.
HEY-HEY, THAT DOES MAKE EATING A CARROT
SOUND MORE EXCITING.
KEEP GOING.
JOHNNY DIDN'T KNOW IT,
BUT HIS MATH HOMEWORK WOULD HELP HIM
TO UNLOCK THE SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE.
WHAT?
THIS DOESN'T TELL ME WHAT HOTDOGS ARE MADE OF.
(CHUCKLES) THE POINT IS
A COOL VOICE-OVER CAN EVEN MAKE MATH SOUND EXCITING.
BUT I WANT MY LIFE TO BE MORE EXCITING.
IMAGINE, A VOICE-OVER
THAT COULD ACTUALLY TURN A BORING OLD DAY
INTO AN EXCITING MOVIE!
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: HMM...
SUSAN AND MARY: (GIGGLING)
BOTH: (GASP)
UH, WE WERE NOT PLAYING WITH BUNNIES!
WE WERE UM... EXPERIMENTING.
WHATEVER!
NOW, LIFE CAN BE BORING,
AND VOICE-OVERS ARE EXCITING.
YOU GUYS ARE GENIUSES, RIGHT?
SO WHAT ABOUT INVENTING A VOICE-OVER THING
THAT COULD BRING REAL EXCITEMENT TO LIFE.
SO EVERY DAY IS
(VOICE-OVER VOICE) THE "MOST EXCITING THRILL RIDE OF THE YEAR!"
IT'S AN INTERESTING THOUGHT, JOHNNY.
BUT IT'S SCIENTIFICALLY IMPOSSIBLE.
(SIGHS) OH.
OH WELL.
THEN, I GUESS YOU WON'T BE STARRING
IN YOUR VERY OWN REAL LIFE
ROMANTIC COMEDY PREVIEW WITH GIL NEXT DOOR.
(GASPS) (GASPS)
STOP!
WE'LL SEE WHAT WE CAN DO.
MARY: BEHOLD, THE VOICE-OVER 9000!
HUMANS ONLY USE 10% OF THE BRAIN'S CAPACITY.
(ENERGY WAVES VIBRATE)
SO THE VO-9000 USES THE OTHER 90 PERCENT
TO CONNECT POWERFUL BRAINWAVES
THAT ACTUALLY CHANGE PEOPLE'S BEHAVIOUR.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TALK INTO IT.
(VO-9000 VOICE) THIS SUMMER,
ONE DOG WOULD LEARN
THE TRUE MEANING OF SPIRIT...
IN "CHEERLEADER DOG!"
GIMME A "D"! GIMME A "U"!
GIMME A K-E-Y!
WHAT'S THAT SPELL?
DUKEY!
BOTH: (GIGGLE)
WELL, THAT WAS WEIRD, BUT I DO FEEL PEPPY.
(CHUCKLES) AND PRETTY.
SUSAN: THERE'S ALSO AN AUTO MODE.
WE PRE-PROGRAMMED THE VO-9000
WITH SEVERAL MOVIE TRAILERS
GUARANTEED TO MAKE YOUR DAY MORE EXCITING.
YOU CAN SWITCH FROM ACTION TO HORROR,
TO ROMANTIC COMEDY!
VO-9000: THE GIRLS HAD GIVEN UP ON LOVE,
UNTIL GILL NEXT DOOR
REALIZED THEY HAD AS MUCH IN COMMON
AS THREE HYDROGEN ATOMS.
SUSAN AND MARY: GILL!
HELLO, GIRLS WHO LOVE SCIENCE AS MUCH AS I DO.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN ME FOR A LOVELY AFTERNOON
OF DOING THINGS WE HAVE IN COMMON?
BOTH: (DREAMY SIGHS)
LATER, JOHNNY.
JOHNNY: OH, THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD.
JOHNNY WAS SICK OF LONG RIDES
ON THE BUS.
SO THIS MORNING,
HIS RIDE WAS GONNA GET A LITTLE LONGER.
HEY!
WAIT FOR IT.
NICE.
I WISH YOU COULD COME TO SCHOOL WITH ME,
'CAUSE I'M GONNA HAVE FUN
TESTING OUT THE AUTO MODE.
JOHNNY, BE SURE TO HURRY HOME FROM SCHOOL.
TONIGHT'S MEATLOAF NIGHT!
WHERE'D YOU GET THE LIMO?
FOUND IT. WOO-HOO!
(TIRES SQUEAL)
MR. TEACHERMAN: AND SIMPLY SOLVE FOR PI.
(*** BEEPS)
JOHNNY: (VO-9000 VOICE) IN A WORLD WHERE A TEACHER WAS TAKING BORED
TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL,
JOHNNY WOULD SOON DISCOVER
THAT THE ONLY PI HE'D HAVE TO SOLVE...
WAS PIZZA PIE! (STUDENTS CHEER)
UGH!
STUDENTS: (CHEERING)
WOO HOO!
SUSAN: SO... GILL...
WHAT SHOULD WE DO NOW?
GO DANCING? SWIMMING?
LOOK AT THE CLOUDS AND DREAM?
GILL: NO.
I THOUGH WE COULD PLAY WITH...
MY BUNNY COLLECTION!
SUSAN AND MARY: (GASP)
ISN'T IT GREAT
THAT WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON?
SUSAN AND MARY: (GROAN)
THIS MIGHT BE SUSAN AND MARY'S
GREATEST INVENTION YET!
HUH?
(ICE CREAM TRUCK MUSIC PLAYS)
SO... GIVE IT HERE.
WHAT STARTED OUT AS A NORMAL AFTERNOON
WAS ABOUT TO GET SWEETER.
(TIRES SQUEAL)
ICE CREAM VENDOR: WHO WANTS FREE ICE CREAM?!
(ENGINE REVS, TIRES SQUEAL)
(LICKING)
FREE ICE CREAM TASTES WAY BETTER
THAN PAID-FOR ICE CREAM.
(LICKING)
UM, CAREFUL WHERE YOU DRIP.
EHN, IT WON'T HURT ANYTHING. RIGHT?
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLES)
VO-9000: (STAMMERS) COMING TO A THEATER NEAR YOU!
RATED PG13! SPEED MCCOOL!
LOVE WAS R-R-R-RIGHT AROUND... (ERRATIC SPEECH)
MONKEY! M-M-M-MONKEY.
IN A WOR-WOR-WORLD...
(PUNCHING GRUNT)
ANYWAY...
VO-9000: L-L-LITTLE DID JOHNNY KNOW
HE WAS ABOUT TO BE KIDNAPPED BY NINJAS.
SAY WHA?
IT SHORTED OUT AND IT'S STUCK
ON ACTION-MODE!
NINJAS: (FIGHTING GRUNTS)
JOHNNY: OH, THIS IS BAD.
RUN!
DUKEY AND JOHNNY: AHHHHH!
NINJAS: (ATTACK YELLS)
GILL: AND THIS IS CHARLOTTE AND THIS IS RACHEL.
SHE'S MY FAVORITE.
PLAYING WITH BUNNIES WITH NEW FRIENDS IS FUN!
YEAH, LOTS OF FUN.
YEAH, BUT WE HAVE TO GO - NOW! -
AND FIND OUR BROTHER AND DISMANTLE
A LITTLE INVENTION WE MADE.
GET OUT!
I LOVE LITTLE INVENTIONS TOO.
BEHOLD THE BUNNY-BOT 9000.
(*** CRANKS)
(BARKING ANGRILY)
SUSAN AND MARY: AAAHHH! GET IT OFF!
AW, HE LIKES YOU.
FIND JOHNNY!
NINJAS: (ANGRY YELLING)
(ANGRY YELLING)
TURN IF OFF! TURN IT OFF!
IT WON'T TURN OFF!
VO-9000: B-B-BUT HOW COULD THEY DEAL WITH A ROGUE COP
BENT ON REVENGE?
NO, NO. NOT THE ROGUE COP!
YOU TWO ARE GOING DOWN.
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: AHHHHH!
WAIT! DON'T YOU WANNA DO SCIENCE-Y STUFF TOGETHER?
BOTH: NO!
OKAY. UH, THEN LET'S GO DANCING.
BOTH: HUH? (GIGGLE)
GILL: LOOK, WE EVEN HAVE THE SAME DRESS IN COMMON!
SUSAN AND MARY: TAH!
AHHHHHHH!
(LAUGHING GIDDILY)
VO-9000: AND A P-P-PACK OF TURBO T-T-TODDLERS!
(SCHOOL BELL RINGS, PRESCHOOLERS SCREAM)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: AAHHHHHH!
DO YOU WANT SPRINKLES?
NINJAS: OH! (MUTTERING IN AGREEMENT)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
PRESCHOOLERS: (SCREAMING)
NINJAS: (ATTACK YELLING)
NINJAS AND PRESCHOOLERS: (SCREAMING)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: WE HAVE TO FIND SUSAN AND MARY!
COME BACK, GIRLS WHO I HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON WITH!
UM, WE HAVE TO GO TO A BALLET,
SO GO HOME.
BYE!
BUT I LOVE BALLET TOO!
(GRUNTS)
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
SUSAN: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!
JOHNNY: THE VOICE-OVER 9000 IS BROKEN!
I GOT NINJA'S AND COPS
AND KINDERGARTNERS CHASING ME!
DON'T BREAK IT
OR ITS EFFECTS COULD BECOME IRREVERSIBLE.
IT HAS TO BE REBOOTED.
TAKE A SCREWDRIVER AND OPEN UP THE BACK.
AH, THE JOYS OF MAKING MEATLOAF.
PRESCHOOLERS: (SCREAMING)
NINJAS: (ATTACK YELLS)
THERE'S A BLUE WIRE THAT RUNS THE LENGTH
OF THE DEVICE.
GOT IT.
DON'T TOUCH THAT.
OKAY.
ALL: (CHARGING SCREAMS)
HUH?
ALL: (ATTACK YELLS)
MARY: THERE'S ALSO A YELLOW WIRE
THAT CONNECTS TO A SMALL RED TERMINAL.
DON'T TOUCH THAT EITHER.
PRESCHOOLERS, NINJAS, COP: (CHARGING SCREAMS)
SUSAN: NOW CROSS THE GREEN WIRE WITH THE RED TERMINAL
TO FORCE REBOOT.
HUH? OH, YEAH.
I HOPE THIS WORKS!
(ATTACK YELLS)
(CHARGING SCREAMS)
(ENERGY WAVES VIBRATE)
ALL: (CONFUSED GRUNTS)
(ENERGY WAVES VIBRATE)
UH, WHY AM I ON A SIDEWALK DRESSED LIKE THE TOOTH FAIRY?
WEIRD.
LATER, GIRLS I'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE.
WELL... THAT WAS DIFFERENT.
GOOD WORK, JOHNNY.
NOW TO DESTROY THIS THING ONCE AND FOR ALL.
(MECHANICAL WHIR)
DAD: KIDS, COME DOWN FOR DINNER!
IT'S MEATLOAF NIGHT!
SUSAN AND MARY: (MOAN)
JOHNNY AND DUKEY: (WORRIED GROANS)
DUKEY: IN A WORLD
WHERE DAD'S MEATLOAF WAS AS DRY AS A DESERT MUSKRAT,
THE TEST KIDS WERE ABOUT TO HAVE
THE BIGGEST PARTY OF THEIR LIVES!
HUH!
PRESCHOOLERS: (CHEERING)
ALL RIGHT, A PARTY!
HAH!
PRESCHOOLER: YAY!
NINJAS: (EXCITED NINJA CALLS)
GILL: OH YES! AWESOME PIZZA!
(CHEERING)
♪♪
NEWS ANCHOR: AND REPORTS NOW SAY
GLOBAL WARMING IS REDUCING THE PENGUIN POPULATION.
WITH LARGE CHUNKS OF THE ICE CAP MELTING,
THE FLIGHTLESS FURBALLS
ARE QUICLY LOSING THEIR HOMELAND.
(BEEPS TV OFF)
PENGUINE: OW!
(SNEERS)
(COLD WIND GUSTS)
(SNORING)
(ATTACK GRUNTS)
(SECURITY ALARM BLARES)
WHAAA-EEEEEE!
PENGUINS: (CHARGING SCREAMS)
AAHHHHH!
SOLDIERS: (SCREAM)
(PANICKED SCREAMS)
MAYDAY! MAYDAY!
WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!
PENGUINS!
PENGUINS! EVERYWHERE!
HEEELP!
GOOD LORD,
IT HAS BEGUN.
DUKEY: ARCTIC RECON: BATTLE FOR FROZEN EARTH?
IT'S AN ON-LINE GAME SPONSORED BY THE MILITARY!
AND IT'S AWESOME,
AND VIOLENT AND FREE!
BUT IT SAYS YOU HAVE TO BE 18 TO PLAY
AND WILLING TO "SERVE"
IN CASE OF A NATIONAL EMERGENCY.
AND NOW I AM -
AS FAR AS THEY KNOW.
YOU'RE GONNA GET IN TROUBLE.
AND YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH TO SERVE IN THE MILITARY
AND- LOOK OUT! HERE COME THE ALIEN INVADERS!
(EXPLOSIONS, ALIENS GROWL)
I TOLD YOU THIS GAME WAS AWESOME!
IT'S LIKE A REAL BATTLE FOR FROZEN EARTH!
(HELICOPTERS ZIP BY)
SIR, DO YOU THINK WE BROUGHT ENOUGH TROOPS?
WE'RE FIGHTING A ROGUE ENEMY
WE'VE NEVER FOUGHT BEFORE.
WE'RE FIGHTING PENGUINS!
AND I'M PRETTY SURE
I CAN DEFEAT A PACK OF STUPID FLIGHTLESS BIRDS.
ALPHA PENGUIN: WHAA-EEEEE!
WHOA!
I DIDN'T SEE THAT COMIN'.
(EXPLOSION)
MR. BLACK: WE'RE OKAY.
HUH?
WE NEED MORE TROOPS!
(RAPID WEAPON FIRE)
RETREAT!
SOLDIERS: (DODGING GRUNTS)
(RAPID WEAPON SHOTS)
(GAME BEEPS) (EXPLOSIONS)
(BEEPING)
I JUST GOT THE HIGH SCORE!
(CHUCKLES)
I THINK THAT IF YOU WERE CALLED TO BATTLE,
YOU WOULD TOTALLY KICK SOME-
(DOORBELL DINGS)
ARE YOU JOHNNY TEST?
WHO PLAYS ARCTIC RECON ON-LINE
AND HAS THE HIGH SCORE AND SAID HE WAS 18?
UH....
WE JUST SUFFERED A DEFEAT AGAINST ROGUE PENGUINS
AND WE'RE CALLING YOU UP. LET'S GO.
(GASPS)
HERE'S A FUNNY STORY:
I'M NOT REALLY 18, I'M 11. WHOOPSIES.
THAT'S WHAT THEY ALL SAY.
I'M TELLING YOU I'M 11!
I JUST WANTED TO PLAY...
JOHNNY'S BEEN DRAFTED!
TOUR GUIDE: AND NOW, ARGENTINA IS ONLY 700 MILES FROM ANTARCTICA.
WITH GLOBAL WARMING CONTINUING,
WE PRESUME MORE AND MORE PENGUINS
WILL MAKE THE TRIP LOOKING FOR A NEW HOME.
(BUTTON BEEPS)
(EXPLOSIONS)
RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
TOURISTS: (PANICKED SCREAMS)
(VICTORIOUS HOLLERS)
(TRUMPETS)
(HELICOPTER ROTORS BEAT)
NO! IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!
IT CAN'T BE!
WELL, THERE YA GO.
THE PENGUINS CAPTURED ARGENTINA!
AND THE WHOLE WORLD COULD BE NEXT.
NOT IF WE TRAIN AND EQUIP
A NEW GENERATION OF SUPER SOLDIERS
AND DEFEAT THIS ULTIMATE FOE
WITH ULTIMATE FIGHTERS.
I'M ONLY 11.
THE GENERAL: MEN, THE WORLD IS FACING ITS GREATEST THREAT EVER:
PENGUINS,
AND THEY ARE REALLY MAD ABOUT GLOBAL WARMING.
AND THEY STOLE SOME WEAPONS.
NOW, THEY ARE POISED,
UH, WELL, TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD.
PENGUINS? WE'RE LOSING TO PENGUINS?
IT'S AN UNPREDICTABLE ENEMY, OVER 3 MILLION STRONG,
WITH NOTHING TO LOSE.
YOU WILL ALL BE TRAINED FOR THIS IMPORTANT MISSION
AND TOGETHER WE WILL DEFEAT THIS FOE.
OH, UH, UH, GOOD LUCK.
UH, I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE.
I SHOULD BE IN MY 5TH GRADE CLASS!
AND... (GASPS)
THIS IS JUST LIKE THE ONE IN THE GAME
ONLY IT'S REAL.
JOHNNY LIKE.
DUKEY: HIYAH!
JOHNNY GOT DRAFTED, AND HE'S IN THE MILITARY
AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!
AND YOU HAVE TO HELP HIM!
NO. I HAVE TO FINISH THE NEW BLING-BLING BLASTER.
IF EUGENE EVER COMES TO ASK ME FOR A DATE,
WE JUST ZAP HIM AND HE'S STUNNED FOR 24 HOURS.
AND IT'S PAINLESS.
I ADDED THE PAINLESS PART.
(HEAVY RUMBLING)
SUSAN TEST! GO ON A DATE WITH ME!
BOTH: IT WORKS!
YOU WON'T HELP JOHNNY WHO'S IN TROUBLE?
THEN I WILL GET YOU IN TROUBLE.
HOW?
I'LL EXPOSE MY TALKING ORIGIN
TO YOUR DAD,
AND GET YOU IN TROUBLE FOR MAKING A TALKING DOG!
HE'S BLUFFING.
(MECHANICAL WHIRRING)
COOL.
YOU WILL GO THROUGH SIMULATED TRAINING
WHERE YOU WILL BATTLE A ROBOT ENEMY IN OUR....
STATE OF THE ART ELEVENTY KADILLION DOLLAR
FROZEN TRAINING FACILITY.
AND ONLY THE STRONGEST SOLDIERS
WILL BE SELECTED FOR THIS MISSION.
OH, THIS IS GONNA BE FUN.
NEWS ANCHOR: AND NOW A SPECIAL REPORT ON THE PENGUIN WAR.
(CLEARS THROAT) EXCUSE ME...
SUSAN AND MARY: HIYAH!
DID DUKEY JUST TALK?
NO. HE'S UH...
JUST CHOKING!
OH! I'LL GO ONLINE AND FIND OUT WHAT TO DO!
OKAY, YOU WIN.
BUT WE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE JOHNNY IS
TO RESCUE HIM!
NEWS ANCHOR: ...BUT A SPECIAL FORCE IS NOW BEING TRAINED
TO DEFEAT THE ROGUE PENGUINS
BENT ON WORLD DOMINATION.
WOO-HOO! YEAH-HA! (EXCITED GRUNTS)
MARY: OKAY, I'LL MAKE TWO MORE BLING-BLING BLASTERS.
JOHNNY: (GRUNTS)
EAT THAT!
BOO-YAH!
(GRUNTS) HIZAHH!
MR. BLACK: WHO IS THAT SOLDIER?
HE'S AMAZING.
WOO-HOO! HA-HA!
DIDN'T I TELL YOU THIS 1000-ACRE FROZEN FACILITY
WAS WORTH ELEVENTY KADILLION DOLLARS?!
(EXPLOSION)
(BLASTERS WHIR AND FIRE)
PHOO!
FIND JOHNNY AND FREEZE HIM.
THEN WE'LL DRAG HIM HOME AND THAW HIM OUT LATER.
WHO ARE THOSE ROGUE FIGHTERS!
THOSE AREN'T OURS!
STOP THOSE ROGUE WARRIORS.
(SECURITY ALARM BUZZES)
UH OH. NOW WE'RE THE TARGETS!
SOLDIER: STAND DOWN.
WE DON'T WANT TO HURT YOU.
YEAH, SAME HERE, BUB.
FREEZE THEM!
YAAAAH!
HOOO!
HIYAH!
WA-HIYAH! (GRUNTS OF EFFORT)
(ATTACK GRUNTS)
JOHNNY: FREEZE, ENEMY SOLDIERS!
DON'T MOVE.
JOHNNY, IT'S US. WE'RE HERE TO SAVE YOU.
BUT I'M HAVING A BLAST.
LITERALLY!
YEAH, BUT YOU CAN'T GO TO WAR. YOU'RE 11.
(HORN HONKS)
WHAT'S GOING ON? WHO ARE YOU?
AND WITH THOSE WEAPONS,
WE'RE GONNA KICK THOSE PENGUINS'...
BUT IT'S THE TEST KIDS
AND THEIR FRIEND WITH THE HAIR DISORDER!
MR. BLACK: JOHNNY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
I SIGNED UP FOR THE VIDEO GAME -
PROBABLY SHOULDN'T HAVE -
BUT I TOLD THE SERGEANT I WAS ONLY 11.
IS THIS TRUE, SERGEANT?!
UH, HE'S TEMPORARILY FROZEN,
BUT HE'LL BE FINE IN 24 HOURS.
ARE WE IN TROUBLE?
THE GENERAL: NO, JOHNNY,
YOU'RE NOT IN TROUBLE, BUT THE WORLD IS.
WITH THOSE ROGUE PENGUINS ON THE LOOSE
AND NO TROOPS TO FIGHT THEM...
IT'S OVER.
DID I SAY I WAS 11? I MEANT 18.
SUSAN, MARY, AND DUKEY: UH, WE'RE 18, TOO!
OH, WELL I'M TOUCHED, KIDS,
BUT I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT LET YOU LIE ABOUT YOUR AGE
TO SERVE YOUR COUNTRY.
WHY NOT?
GOOD POINT! NOW GET THOSE BATTLE SUITS ON,
AND GET ME MORE OF THEM BLING-BLING BLASTERS!
WE GOT A PENGUIN WAR TO WIN!
ALL: YES SIR!
THE GENERAL: SET YOUR BLING-BLING BLASTERS TO AUTOMATIC
AND HOPE FOR THE BEST!
I NEED YOU TO SIGN THIS,
SAYING IT'S OKAY TO MISS SCHOOL TODAY!
OH SURE. NO PROBLEM!
(BOMBS WHISTLE THROUGH THE AIR AND EXPLODE)
(EXPLOSIONS AND HEAVY WEAPON FIRE)
THE GENERAL: AAAAAHHHHH!
KIDS: AAAAHHHHH!
PENGUINS: (ANGRY CHATTER)
YEAH, TAKE THAT! AND A COUPLE OF THESE!
YOU LIKE THAT?
WELL, I GOT ONE MORE.
(RAPID WEAPON FIRE) (GUTTURAL ATTACK YELLS)
THE GENERAL: HEY, HERE'S ONE CHOCOLATE-COATED FOR YA.
(RAPID BLASTING)
WE DID IT! WE WON!
BUT WHY DO I FEEL SO BAD?
BECAUSE THEY NEVER WANTED THIS WAR, JOHNNY.
NO. THEY WERE JUST LOOKING FOR MORE LAND
BECAUSE THEY'RE LOSING THEIR LAND HERE.
I FEEL BAD TOO. BUT WHAT CAN WE DO?
IT'S NOT LIKE WE CAN JUST MOVE THEM
TO SOMEPLACE NICER, FROZENER AND MORE FUN.
YES, WE CAN.
PENGUINS: (HAPPY CHATTER)
THE GENERAL: OH, GREAT.
THERE GOES THE ENTIRE MILITARY BUDGET.
WELL, GENERAL,
YOU MAY HAVE LOST A ELEVENTY KADILLION DOLLAR
ULTRA-MODERN TRAINING FACILITY...
JOHNNY, THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER.
BUT YOU ARE THE GENERAL
WHO WON THE FIRST EVER PENGUIN WAR.
OH, I AM? I AM!
ER... GREAT! I'LL GIVE MYSELF A MEDAL!
HA-HA!
UH-OH.
(CHEERING)