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Lights out!
Hey guards, get back here.
This bed is hard and the blankets make my membrane itchy.
This is no way to treat the great Staph Sergeant!
Corporal,
How long have we been rotting away in this cell?
10 minutes sir.
Outrageous!
This never would have happened if it weren't for those those PDI agents.
I remember it like it was yesterday.
It was yesterday sir.
Quiet!
Our plan was
flawless. All the troops were in place.
The plans laid out for the great epidemic.
Troops, today
we launch our attack.
Prepare
to invade.
Ecolis you stake out the toilet handle. Yes, sir!
Staphies
take your position on the water faucet. Yes, sir!
Shigellas, rout around the door handles.
Yes, sir!
Who are they sir?
Oh, that's just a piece of my sandwich.
That's very unsanitary sir.
Quiet! Men,
from these positions we will launch our attack.
You must stay invisible. Do not let them see you.
Jump on when they touch your location and spread as fast as you can. We'll hitch a
ride from this location
and infect the city, the world, the
universe!
(evil laugh)
Remember troops,
fight dirty
(laughing) get it were germs. I get it sir. You're no fun.
Get ready troops.
Yes.
He touched the handle and our troops climbed on board.
To
the faucet.
Excellent.
Our germs will be everywhere.
Wait, he's using the soap
Ob no.
It's too powerful.
Corporal
If he washes his hands with that stuff for more than 20 seconds
we'll lose the whol platoon.
Oh, the germanity.
Troops fall back
before he
uses the paper towel to block us.
Nooooo!
We'll attack at the door handle.
He's using the same paper towel
to protect himself at the door.
Sweet, slippery, sludge corporal
he's a trained PDI Agent.
That was a tough loss Corporal,
but we learned our lesson
we germs will have to get smarter in order to get people sick.
(Voice through wall) Keep it down, we're trying to sleep.
And I'm trying to tell an evil story.
Now where was I?
About to have another flashback, sir.
Right,
we prepared and all out
aerial invasion.
There we were a force of
ten thousand gooey, sticky, nasty germs ready to infect.
Today, we will move out
further, and faster
than ever.
Any moment now
all
ten thousand of us
will be launched into the world at one hundred miles per hour.
Armed with all our germy weapons to attack
he humans.
(Evil laugh)
Get ready troops.
Prepare for launch.
Steady.
Steady.
Release the germs.
What happened?
Everything is all white. Am I dead?
We're in a tissue sir. I knew that.
Well, we were stopped here.
Let's hope the other platoon reaches their mission.
Here he goes.
No, not into your sleeve. Foiled by the long arm of the law.
Hey, stay away from that hand sanitizer. That will wipe out whole armies of germs. Noooo!
Where are all these PDI agents coming from?
That was a sad day
for our troops.
We flew right into the PDI trap,
but world domination would yet be ours.
I had one final plan.
My most devious one yet.
We would use their own agents against them by spreading from person to person we would
reign supreme.
Their parents, them friends, and yes
their noses would run from us.
Get it? Noses. (laughing)
Stick with your day job, sir.
Here we go.
We'll start our attack on the school bus.
I can hardly wait.
So many children to infect.
Wait. What's this?
Not going to school.
Noooo!
How can we take over the universe
if she stays here?
She's going back to bed?
Awww. Her mom is tucking her in. I miss my mommy.
You don't have a mommy sir. You were formed by cell division.
Quiet!
What?
She's a PDI agent too?
Noooo! We were defeated by those agents Corporal
but just wait till we bust out of here. We'll find someplace with no pesky agents.
Then victory will be ours!
But sir, everyone could be PDI Agents if they just follow three simple rules.
By washing their hands, covering their cough and sneeze, and staying home when they are sick.
They could easily protect themselves and others from germs like us.
Oh, why are you even with me Corporal?
I like your enthusiasm.
Would you say, it's infectious? No.
Protect! Don't Infect!
What a lousy time to be a germ.
Whose idea was it to recruit so many PDI agents?
Not me, I can tell you. We've got to get back to the situation room corporal.
Somebody get me another sandwich!