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Hey internet! So today I actually, like, preplanned a theme! Today's theme
is 'terrible pickup lines'
If I had four quarters to give to the most attractive person in the world? You'd have a dollar.
I'm sorry, were you talking to me?
Oh, no? Please, start.
Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? No. Just enough to break the ice.
Our long-term relationship starts... Now.
Is there an airport nearby, or is that just
my heart taking off?
Kinda like meta-entertaining, like this one:
Nice shoes. Wanna f*ck? Do you have a map?
I just get lost in your eyes. You must be a broom,
because you just swept me off my feet.
I swear, I am not drunk. I am intoxicated by you.
Oh, hi. I'm a
theif. I'm here to steal your heart.
Do you like Harry Potter? Because
I a-Dumbledore you.
Pretend this is a rose for the purpose of this discussion. I hope you don't mind me giving you
this rose, but... I just had to show it how beautiful you are.
there are a lot of terrible...
not even terrible, just disturbing pickup lines on the internet
it just says "do you know how to use a whip?"
What. Oh, hey, can I borrow your phone?
I need to call God and tell him
I found his missing angel.
I think I'm making the same face after every one of these.
I am okay with that. Oh god, this is terrible.
"I would bury my *** so far inside of you that whoever pulled it out would be King of Camelot"
Is your name WiFi, because I'm feeling
a connection. Let's wrap this up with a terrible one.
I'll twitter your yahoo til you google all over my facebook.
I can't believe I just said that with a straight face.