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Welcome to "counseling & words" and to
my word of today which is the English
word "jouska"; and I will start with a
question today.
Have you ever held a conversation in your
mind where you reviewed something from
all angles? For example, you want your
boss to agree to your one-month holiday?
And as you imagine the meeting you feel
your heart racing and you start to sweat.
You want to be ready with strong
examples and you hope that the
conversation will be easy-going and
successful for you.
What you've been doing and
physiologically experiencing is called
"jouska". "Jouska" is a hypothetical
conversation that you repeat again and
again in your head. You are replaying an
argument in your head where you say all
the right things and you win the
argument. You are practicing all the
possible reactions and your responses.
Well it seems that these thoughts are
very very common when we are expecting a
conflict conversation, and also after one.
On one hand we regret what we said and
we start replaying the discussion to
include what we wished we had
successfully conveyed. And on the other
hand "jouska" also refers to preparing
for a potential conflict. While we are
talking in our head we imagine what we
expect the other person may say in
response and our reactions to each
comment. We all enter into conversations
with our own opinions, feelings, theories
and experiences. So when we are involved
in conversations we need to be aware and
to remember that our opinions might
differ from others. We believe one thing
and they another. We have our own history
and they have theirs. So, when we are, when
the emotions are strong we are, we
usually are not our best selves
unfortunately. So "jouska" can be a
useful method to get prepared for
difficult conversations. Well, that was
about my English word "jouska".
Thank you very much for watching! I wish
you a great week and see you next time
with a new word.
Bye-bye!