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Beyoncé of House Knowles, first of her name,
queen of everything, child of Destiny,
-mother of single ladies... -(laughter)
dropped her new album, Lemonade,
which is apparently right around the corner
-from where fudge is made. Um... -(laughter)
(applause and cheering)
-Along with... an HBO special... -MAN: Yes!
Along with an HBO special that made her fans do this.
They were very excited.
-(laughter) -Uh, now the... the... the...
The biggest revelation from the album
is that Jay Z might have cheated.
Now, he warned her in advance that he was big pimpin',
and monogamy goes with pimpin'
like sardines with peanut butter, but come on.
It's Beyoncé!
(applause and cheering)
There is speculation.
Fans think the affair was with fashion designer
and person not-that-many-people-know
Rachel Roy, which led to some confused people on the Internet
to start attacking celebrity chef Rachael Ray...
(laughter and applause)
...uh... seen here
being that cooking lady on TV that your mom likes.
Now, angry fans left lemon emoji
all over Ray-Ray's Instagram, like this.
(laughter)
Others, however, came to Rachael Ray's defense.
Y'all dumb as hell,
she's just trying to make burgers.
(laughter, applause)
So, comedians...
how can Rachael Ray fire back against this injustice?
Alanna Masterson.
She should actually (bleep) Jay Z.
(laughter)
HARDWICK: That would be amazing.
-(applause) -That would be amazing.
Points. Danny Masterson.
She should send over some of her famous blueberry, oatmeal,
flaxseed and rat poison muffins.
-Yeah. Points. Very good. -(laughter, applause)
-That's what she's known for. -Those are top sellers.