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Hello, I'm Susan Fitzell. Should children do as we say and not as we do? In all honesty,
we are responsible for role-modeling peaceful behavior for children. Role modeling appropriate
behavior is a vital and necessary component of effective character education and bullying
prevention.
Who we are, what we think, and what we believe is revealed through our words and behavior.
If we buy into the adage that "boys will be boys," our words and behavior will reflect
it. If we have prejudices, they will be apparent. If we say that "our team" should just
go over and kick the crap out of that team," our children will hear it. Everything we say and
do provides the foundation for children's belief systems and attitudes.
Sometimes, we are not even conscious of what we do believe. Often, until we find ourselves
reacting to a situation we feel strongly about, we don't really know that we have bought into
a stereotype, a prejudice, or an attitude that limits us. Only when we become self-aware
can we change our attitudes and beliefs to reflect the image we want our children to
model. We can use all the curricula, books, sing-along peace tapes, and words we want
to teach children how to live peacefully, but if our words and behavior send a different
message, children will be confused. They are more likely to do what we do, rather than
what we say.
So, here is step one of your mission if you choose to accept it: Be your own behavior
detective. Listen for conflicts between the words you speak and the behavior you expect
from youth. Are you willing to accept this mission?