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There you are. Mind how you go.
Four Candles!
Four Candles?
Four Candles.
No, four candles!
Well there you are, four candles!
No, fork 'andles! 'Andles for forks!
Fork handles.
Thought you said 'four candles'!
Next?
Got any plugs?
Plugs?
What kind of plugs?
A rubber one, bathroom.
What size?
Thirteen amp!
It's electric bathroom plugs, we call them, in the trade.
Electric bathroom plugs!
Saw tips!
Saw tips?
What d'you want? Ointment, or something like that?
No, saw tips for covering saws.
Oh, haven't got any, haven't got any.
Comin' in, but we haven' got any.
Next?
'O's!
'O's?
'O's.
No, 'O's!
'O's! I thought you said 'O's!
When you said 'O's, I thought you said 'O!
'O's!
No, 'O's!
O's? Oh, you mean *** 'O's, *** 'O's!
No, no, 'O's! 'O's for the gate. Mon repose! 'O's! Letter 'O's!
Letter O's! You had me going there!
How many d'you want?
Two.
Yes, next?
Got any P's?
For Gawd sake,
why didn' you bleedin' tell me that while I was up there then?
I'm up and down the shop already,
it's up and down the bleedin' shop all the time.
Honestly, I've got all this shop, I ain't got any help,
it's worth it we plan things.
How many d'you want?
No! Tins of peas. Three tins of peas!
You're 'avin' me on, ain't ya, yer 'avin' me on?
I'm not!
Next?
Got any pumps?
'And pumps, foot pumps? Come on!
Foot pumps!
Foot pumps.
See a foot pump? Tidy up in 'ere.
No, pumps fer ya feet! Brown, size nine!
You are 'avin' me on, you are definitely 'avin' me on!
I'm not!
You are 'avin' me on!
Next?
Washers!
What, dishwashers, floor washers, car washers,
windscreen washers, back scrubbers, lavatory cleaners?
Floor washers?
'Alf inch washers!
Oh, tap washers, tap washers?
Look, I've had just about enough of this, give us that list.
I'll get it all myself!
What's this? What's that? Oh that does it!
That just about does it! I have just about had it!
Mr. Jones!
You come out and serve this customer please,
I have just about had enough of 'im.
Look what 'e's got on there! Look what 'e's got on there!
Right! How many would ya like? One or two?