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This is the month of November 2013 and you're watching ZTV News
now for your host the one and only,
I hope,
See? Was that so hard Dave?
You can be a good boy when you want to be,
or when I threaten your new car.
You leave my Shelby out of this you *** harpy
I will end you!
Oh Dave, your tears of frustration are my gatorade
Greetings my little Zonelings,
I'm Zone-tan
and welcome again to ZTV News,
your regular source for updates feedback and news here at Zone Archive.
Our sincerest apologies for the erratic schedule that we keep here in the studio.
Let's dive right into the mail bag and answer some of your burning questions.
Our first letter comes from Homura Hitomi who writes,
"Dear Zone-tan,
I have enjoyed all the flash over the past few years as they are in the highest quality.
Although I have observed that a lot of your recent flash are majorly based off of Western cartoons or media.
Is it possible that you will be on a comeback to the Japanese anime sources like the old times.
Best of luck and keep up the good work
Homura Hitomi.
Thank you for writing Homura,
while it is true that the archive has seen more characters from western media in recent years,
it is not for any other reason than to promote a sense of globalism.
We are all one people,
sharing one planet,
united by our love of the female form,
and tentacles.
We will certainly return to an eastern aesthetic sometime in the future,
but I cannot say for sure when.
All I can say is keep your eyes peeled and those flies unzipped.
Our next letter comes from Tyler Tibbs.
Heeey what's up Zone?
It's Tyler.
I know you're probably not familiar with me,
but still we are still close friends at heart.
LOLOL.
I'm a really big fan of you and your work.
You're really funny in your videos when you fight with Dave LOL you crack me up everytime.
So I just wanted to hit you up and I was wondering if you could answer one of my questions on the show sometime.
It would really mean a lot.
I hope you reply to this message,
your awesome fan Tyler.
Thank you for the letter Tyler, we will be happy to answer one of your questions on the show.
Our last letter comes from Daniel Velasco who writes,
Dear Zone-tan,
Okay I got a few things that I have to clear up,
Number 1
I watch you cap
not the other way around,
2
Can you find time to make a dragonball z and or bleach parody sometime?
3
Thank you for writing Daniel.
As for your first statement,
No!
No you don't.
And as far as your actual question,
Zone feels that there is enough Dragonball Z and Bleach ***
and many of them high quality,
still
the Yoruichi flash that was teased a few episodes back is still on the back burner,
so you may see some bleach material sometime in the future,
maybe,
possibly,
don't quote me on that.
And now
And now We have a new segment here on ZTV News,
What?!
hosted by yours truly.
Nobody told me about this...
There was a company-wide e-mail sent Zone-tan, not our fault you never check your AOL,
and by the way 1999 called, they are shutting down your angelfire account.
Screw you in the dickhole *** stain.
Silence!
you're about the enter
the gallery!
Ah yes, it is time for us to do away with crassness and vulgarity,
and step into the world of refinement
and fanart.
We're just showing fanart?
Silence!
our first piece is on display!
This lovely work is by outcast4358,
and it remarkly demonstrates the duality in the human condition.
Notice her statement,
she is watching you fap.
Surely this remark is meant to entice and titillate,
but she only comes off as stupid and homely,
perhaps a metaphor for the desparate nature within us all
or just within Zone-tan.
Why are we whispering?
There is noone else here!
Silence!
the gallery continues.
We continue this artful menagerie with Jo Pereira's masterpiece,
Zone-tan Waifu!
Gleaming the surface we find our Zone-tan content and pleased,
that she has fine meal for her goodly husband.
But
scratch further under the surface, and you can peer nto her true character,
a cumdumpster,
whose true calling
is in the kitchen.
I swear to god Dave...
Silence!
We are nearing the gallery's end.
Finally we come to Kuzu-senpai's Zone-tan.
A simply marvelous work,
masterfully depicting Zone-tan
in her most stripped down and vulnerable state.
Having been ravaged by Lemmy and brought to a cathartic climax, her eyes look vacant,
even more so than usual.
The light of intelligence has been dimmed.
Her true self finally released
a cu...
A cumdumpster, yes.
Thank you Dave for that lovely tour
and for reminding me why I keep a gun in my desk.
And now for a segment I've been looking forward to for a long time.
We have a very special guest with us here.
He's an incredibly talented flash artist,
animator,
and...
calm down Zone-tan you can do this,
and voice actor.
Please welcome our very,
very, dear guest
Harry Partridge.
Hello Zone-tan, lovely to be here at the studio, thank you for having me.
Thank you, it's uh lovely to have you,
um...
I guess we should start off with why you are here?
Oh well absolutely, I'm here to announce a joint venture between Zone and myself,
I've given my permission and approval
for an animated starbarians loop to be produced for the archive,
uh we haven't exactly got the release date cemented yet, but you can definitely look out for it sometime in the future.
That's great Harry,
oh wait
you don't mind if I call you Harry right?
Hehehe, it's my name, I think,
go ahead.
Good,
I just wanted to tell that we're
big fans of your work here
and well
specially me, I mean I just love Starbarians
and Saturday Morning Watchmen,
I just love it all.
Hey my *** is for sitting, not for kissing but thank you very very much.
Yeah uh,
is it alright if I ask you a question?
Yeah go ahead.
Have you ever been attracted to a drawing before?
Uhm w-what do you mean by that?
You know
you've seen a lot of well
drawn women
I'm sure.
Maybe one of them
caught your eye in a certain way,
maybe.
Nn-no I-I don't know what you're asking me. Sorry...
I wanna to taste your spotted ***
He-hu w-what?!
I wanna butter your crumpet, *** your mash,
Wh-you?
climb your apples and pears,
spread your marmite,
minister your silly walk,
vinegar your chips,
I want to ff--
Oh, oh I'm so sorry is that how late it's getting, I had absolutely no idea,
I've gotta go,I've got to get back to watching...
Cool World,
yeah Cool World,
Thank you so much Zone-tan,
you daffy bint,
I loved it, take care, bye bye, thank you for having me.
W-wait, come back!
I love you...
That
was
pathetic...
One more word out of your mouth and I will feast on your soul!
W-Well
this has
Несомненно...
been a manic episode,
so I think it's time we close this out with our coming attractions.
With the anticipated burial at sea DLC nearing release,
Zone has decided the next interactive animation will be on Elizabeth.
Be sure to check the site for any additional updates.
That was the month that was here at ZTV,
ee you next time, and as always
I'm watching you fap.
Uh if you wanna follow the show,
you can find us on youtube and twitter using the links below.
If you got any questions or fanart that you would like to see here,
you can send it to Zone-tan@zone-archive.com
Uh Zone-tan, you gonna be okay?
No mas, no mas...
Z... ZONE-tan?
Hello?
Well looks like someone is gonna wake up with a new tatooooo!
Ugggh