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>> I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I
WAS GOING TO SAY NEXT.
RON PAUL DID INTRODUCE A BILL,N.
THIS IS WHY I LOVE THE
FARMER.
THE GOVERNMENT IS DOING
BIDDING AND FILED A COMPLAINT
AGAINST HIM.
HE TBOT TOGETHER WITH THE OUT
OF STATE CUSTOMERS.
THEY FORMED A GROUP CALLED
GRASS FED ON THE HILL.
EACH MEMBER PURCHASED PART OF
A COW.
HE WASN'T SELLING THE MILK TO
THEM.
THEY WERE SELLING PARTS OF THE
COW.
AND THEN THEY GOT THE MILK.
>> THE JUDGE CALLED IT A SUM
TER FIEWJ -- A SUMTERFUGE.
>> YOU SAID RON PAUL
INTRODUCED A BILL, AND IT
DIDN'T GO ANYWHERE?
>> NOT IN KEEPING WITH HIS
CAREER.
>> THIS FARMER IS LIKE THE
NORMA RAY OF RAW MILK.
>> THIS WHOLE COW SHARING
THING IS FANTASTIC AND THE
JUDGE DOESN'T REWARD THE
INITIATIVE AND CREATIVITY
WHICH IS ANTI-AMERICAN.
GREG, YOU SAID THE MILK IS
BOUGHT BY YUPPIES.
I THINK THEY ARE MORE
HIPPIES.
>> YES, I GUESS SO.
IT IS AN IRRELEVANT WORD.
>> THEY LIKE THE NATURAL
LIFESTYLE.
THEY LIKE THE OPPOSITE.
>> AND THEY STINK.
THEY USE BIZARRO DE YODER
RENT.
IT LOOKS LIKE A ROCK.
>> I DON'T WANT TO GET INTO
IT.
BY THE WAY, THIS HAS NOTHING
TO DO -- MOSTLY NOTHING TO DO
WITH THE STORY.
DID YOU KNOW SALMONELLA WAS
NAMED AFTER A PERSON?
>> REALLY?
>> DANIEL SALMON WAS THE FIRST
TO RECEIVE THE DOCTOR OF
MEDICINE DEGREE.
THEY DISCOVERED SALMONELLA AND
NAMED IT AFTER HIM.
>> THAT'S NICE.
IT IS A TRIBUTE.
>> I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT WAS
NAMED AFTER THE FISH.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ALSO
NAMED AFTER HIM 1234* DANIEL
TOMA.
>> IS THAT RIGHT?
>> WHAT IS THAT?
>> I DON'T KNOW.
>> CAN WE EDIT THAT OUT?
>> YOU AND BILL WILL GO TO THE
SAME IMPROVE CLASSES.
BILL, I HAVE TO ASK YOU ABOUT
YOUR INTEREST VIEW.
INTERVIEW.
HOW DID YOU NOT ASK HIM TO DO
SOME PRINCESS BRIDE RHYMES?
>> I WANTED HIM TO, BUT THE
MORE I TALKED, THE MORE HE
WANTED TO KILL ME.
ARE YOU ASKING ME ABOUT MY MOS
BECAUSE WE ONLY DID A COUPLE
STORIES?
>> YES.
>> WANT TO MAKE SURE.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> I NDZ -- I UNDERSTAND AND I
RESPECT YOUR AIR ARTISTRY.
>> JILL, YOU SAID, QUOTE, I
WILL ONLY DATE PEOPLE WHO
ARE -- AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU SAID.
BUT YOU KNOW YOU ARE MARRIED,
RIGHT?
>> OH MY GOD.
I TOTALLY FORGOT I WAS
MARRIED.
I'M SORRY.
I GOT THE VALENTINE SPIRIT.
I HAVE BEEN ASKING EVERYONE TO
BE MY VALENTINE.
>> IF I HAD A DOLLAR FOR EVERY
TIME YOU SAID THAT.
ARE WE ON FOR DINNER OR NOT?
>> WE CAN STILL HAVE DINNER.
>> IT IS DUTCH.
>> TAKE ME OFF THE SCREEN.
I AM DONE.
>>> A SEGMENT THAT
>>> SO A STUDY LAST WEEK
SHOWED SPANKING CHILDREN LEAD
TO EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS AND
AGGRESSION IN ADULTS, LASS
SORE HAND.
TERRIBLE -- AND ALSO A SORE
HAND.
IF YOU WCH I HAD "THE FIVE"
LAST FRIDAY I DISCUSSED THAT
TOPIC OF SPANKING WITH MY
MOTHER.
BUT YOU ONLY SAW A MINUTE OF
OUR CONVERSATION.
AFTER MANY E MAILS AND TEXTS
FROM PEOPLE ASKING FOR THE
WHOLEHI TNG, I OFFER TO YOU
NOW IN ITS ENTIRETY.
>> HI, MOM, HOW ARE YOU?
>> OKAY, AND HOW ARE YOU?
>> WHAT IS IT, 2:00, 2:30 OVER
THERE?
>> ABOUT 1:30, HONEY.
>> ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO PRETEND
IT IS LIVE.
>> OH, RIGHT.
>> IT IS OKAY.
SO MOM WE ARE TALKING ABOUT
SPANKING.
>> OH YEAH.
>> HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT
SPANKING?
>> WELL, I JUST DON'T BELIEVE
IN IT BECAUSE IT DOES
PRESIDENT -- IT DOESN'T DO ANY
GOOD.
IT MAKES THE KIDS ANGRIER THAN
THEY WERE.
FIRST OF ALL SPANKING USUALLY
REFERS TO SPANKING LITTLE
CHILDREN I THINK.
THEY DON'T GET IT.
THEY WILL REMEMBER ONLY THE
BAD PART.
SO WHAT I USED TO DO WHEN YOU
AND LESLIE WERE ABOUT THE SAME
AGE AND USED TO FIGHT WITH
EACH OTHER, I DIDN'T EVER -- I
NEVER KNEW WHO WAS THE
BEGINNER OF THE FIGHT.
>> IT WAS HER FAULT, MOM.
IT WAS ALWAYS HER FAULT.
BUT GO AHEAD.
>> WE HAD THOSE GATES I PUT
ACROSS THE BEDROOM WHERE THE
DOOR WOULD BE.
I WOULD PUT EACH ONE IN A
SEPARATE ROOM AND JUST SAY NOW
YOU JUST SIT THERE UNTIL YOU
COOL OFF.
FIRST OF ALL I PROBABLY WAS
ANGRY AT BOTH OF YOU AND I
COULD RUN AFTER -- I COULDN'T
RUN AFTER TWO OF YOU.
I COULD HARDLY KEEP MYSELF
STANDING UP.
>> SO YOU DON'T REMEMBER ANY
KIND OF CORPORAL PUNISHMENT
WHEN I WAS GROWING UP?
YOU NEVER CHASED ME AROUND THE
HOUSE WITH A FLY SWATTER?
>> I COULDN'T CATCH YOU.
I WAS 40 YEARS OLD.
YOU WOULD RUN LIKE HECK.
I JUST COULDN'T KEEP UP WITH
YOU.
WELL MAYBE -- I DON'T THINK I
DID ANY CORPORAL PUNISHMENT
THAT THE POLICE WOULD NOTICE.
>> DON'T THINK WE EVER
REALLY CALLED THE POLICE OVER
A FLY SWATTER.
MOM, WHEN YOU WERE GROWING UP,
WEREN'T YOU EVER SPANKED?
>> NO.
MY MOTHER AND FATHER WERE JUST
WONDERFUL.
WITH FOUR KIDS TOO, NO, THEY
REALLY DIDN'T BELIEVE IN
CORPORAL PUNISHMENT.
>> YOU MEAN BACK THEN IN THE
1800'S THEY DIDN'T CHASE YOU
WITH A STRAW BROOM OR SOME
KIND OF SASH?
>> NO, HONEST TO GOODNESS.
THEY SENT US OVER TO THE
NEIGHBORS TO ANNOY THEM.
>> THAT'S AN INTERESTING WAY
OF PUNISHING YOUR CHILD.
>> I AM JUST BEING BAD.
NO, I DON'T THINK WE HAD ANY
TYPE OF CORPORAL PUNISHMENT.
OTHER THAN, YOU KNOW, NOT
LETTING US HAVE WHAT WE WANTED
MAYBE, LIKE GOING OUT WITH THE
BOYS OR SOMETHING.
>> GOING OUT WITH THE BOYS.
MOME, ARE YOU SAYING KIDS
SHOULD NEVER BE SPANKED EVEN
IF THEY ARE OBNOXIOUS AND
LOUD?
>> WELL, I MEAN -- WELL, OF
COURSE IF THEY ARE OBNOXIOUS
AND LOUD, THEN THEY ARE OLDER
AND SPANKING -- THEY WOULD
PROBABLY HIT ME BACK.
>> YES, THAT'S PROBABLY TRUE.
SO YOU CAN'T REALLY -- SEE,
YOU CAN'T USE IT VERY LONG
ANYWAY.
IT DOESN'T DO THAT MUCH GOOD.
I THINK IF YOU COULD -- WHEN
THEY ARE OLDER YOU CAN TALK TO
THEM.
>> SO I JUST WANT TO REITERATE
YOU HAVE NO MEMORY AT ALL OF
CHASING ME AROUND THE LIVING
ROOM WITH A FLY SWATTER?
>> MY GOSH, HONEY, I AM 87
YEARS OLD.
GOD HAS GIVEN ME THE GRACE TO
FORGET A LOT OF THINGS.
>> THAT'S MY POINT.
YOU DON'T REMEMBER THE FLY
SWATTER, DO YOU?
>> NO, I DON'T.
I HAVE SEVERAL THAT ARE
BROKEN.
DO YOU THINK THAT IS PART OF
MY PROBLEM?
>> I THINK THE BROKEN FLY
SWATTERS SHOULD BE A HINT THAT
SOMETHING MIGHT HAVE OCCURRED
BACK IN THE EARLY 70s.
>> YOU MEAN I SWATTED YOU?
>> YES.
>> OH, I SORRY.
>> THAT'S OKAY.
I FORGIVE YOU.
>> GOD KNOWS WHAT YOU ALREADY
DID TO ME.
>> I DON'T REMEMBER THAT
EITHER, MOM.
AND LOOK HOW I TURNED OUT.
APPARENTLY SWATTING ME WITH A
FLY SWATTER --
>> I DON'T THINK I SWATTED YOU
ENOUGH IS MY PROBLEM.
>> YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT.
>> NOW YOU BE A GOOD BOY, AND
I WON'T COME TO NEW YORK AND
HIT YOU.
>> I LIKE HOW SHE WRAPS UP THE
SEGGENT MEANT.
SEE YOU, MOM.
>> BYE.
>> THAT WAS TRULY DELIGHTFUL.
WE ARE NOT FINISHED YET.
WE ARE JUST TAKING A BREAK.
IF YOU LEAVE NOW I WILL SLIGHT
MY FACE-OFF AND FEED IT TO
JESSE.
>>> A MARKETING FIRM IS
OFFERING TO PAY IF THEY TURN
THEIR HOUSE INTO A GIANT
BILLBOARD.
THEY ARE PAYING A COUPLE NEAR
LOS ANGELES NEARLY $2,000 A
MONTH TO TRANSFORM THEIR
FOUR-BEDROOM INTO AN
ADVERTISEMENT.
THEY SAY THEY ARE PLANING TO
DO THIS FOR A THOUSAND HOMES
ACROSS THE COUNTRY.
IS THIS A NOBLE IDEA?
>> IT IS A BRILLIANT IDEA.
IT SHOWS AMERICAN INGENUITY.
I THINK THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD
THINK OF DHOG TO PAY DOWN OUR
DEBT.
YOU WOULD HAVE THE WASHINGTON
MONUMENT BROUGHT TO YOU BY RED
LOBSTER OR THE WHITE HOUSE
BROUGHT TO YOU BY CHINA.
>> I THINK WE COULD MAY DOWN
OUR DEBT JIE. A LITTLE
POLITICAL HUMOR THERE.
JILL, WOULD YOU EVER JUDGE A
MAN WHO WOULD DO THIS TO HIS
ABODE?
IF YOU SAW THE GUY'S APARTMENT
COVERED WITH DECALS?
>> I THINK IT IS A GENIUS
IDEA, BUT IT IS ONE OF THOSE
NOT IN MY BACKYARD THINGS.
IT MAKES ME WANT TO MOVE INTO
A McMANSION WHERE THEY HAVE
THE RULES AND THE SWING SET
CAN'T BE PRIMARY COLORS AND
NEITHER CAN YOUR HOUSE.
>> GOOD PO NIE T.
I HATE BACKYARD STUFF.
IF IT DOESN'T FIT WITH THE
OVERALL -- I HATE IT.
THAT'S WHY I DON'T GO INTO
PEOPLE'S BACKYARDS.
YOU LIVE IN AN APARTMENT.
THE BEST YOU CAN DO IS A
BROKEN BEER SIGN ON THE FRONT
OF YOUR DOOR.
>> WHAT IS SO GREAT ABOUT IT
IS YOU CAN DIRECTLY POINT TO
THE GUY ACROSS THE STREET.
I AM GOING TO PAINT ON MY
DOOR.
WE LOVE MARRIACHI MUSIC IN THE
MORNING, BUT TRY THESE NOISE
CAN SELLING HEADPHONES.
HERE IS A FEW NUMBERS FOR A
FEW PITTBULL ORGANIZATIONS.
>> BILL YOU APPLIED FOR, THIS
BUT AS OF NOW THEY DON'T HAVE
BOARDS FOR CITY DUMPSTERS.
ARE YOU SAD ABOUT THAT?
>> THIS MAKES ME SICK ABOUT
THE WORST COAST. THESE GUYS
GUYS HAVE NEVER BEEN TO THE
MIDWEST.
WE HAVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR A
HUNDRED YEARS.
YOU GO BY ANY BARN AND YOU
WILL SEE THE PROFESSIONAL.
OR THEY WILL DO HOME MAID
ONES.
THEY WILL WRITE ON THE BARN
"COME HERE FOR RAW MILK."
AND THEY WILL MISSPELL MILK
BECAUSE WE ARE DRUNK.
BUT WE HAVE BEEN DOING THIS
FOR A LONGTIME.
>> I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS A
FAMILY.
>> OH ONE OF THEM RICH
FARMERS.
>> I CAN USE THE MONEY.
>> WE HAVE BEEN PASTEURIZING
OUR MILK.
WE CAN SELL IT.
>> WHO CAN BEST BENEFIT FROM
THIS IS MORTGAGE COMPANIES.
DON'T WANT TO LOOK LIKE A GAS
AS WITH YOUR HOUSE?
>> IT IS ONE MORE STEP TOWARD
I HAD JOBING CRAW SEE.
IT PREDICTED EVERYTHING THAT
EVER HAPPENED.
WE WILL CLOSE THINGS OUT WITH
A POST GAME WRAP UP FROM ANDY
LE
>>> SEE YOU BACK HERE TOMORROW
NIGHT AND THEN TOMORROW ON
"THE FIVE."
COMING UP TOMORROW WE HAVE
ANTHONY AND REMI SPENCER AND
DANA VACHON.
>>> HI, ANDY.
>> HI, GREG.
JILL, IS THAT SPIT UP IN YOUR
HAIR?
>> YES, ACTUALLY.
THAT IS SPIT UP IN MY HAIR.
I AM THE MOM OF A
FOUR-MONTH-OLD.
HI, BABY SHANE.
I AM BLOGGING ABOUT THE
GLAMOROUS JOYCE OF
MOTHERHOOD.
THANKS FOR ASKING.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING,
SLASH EARLY AFTERNOON WHAT IS
THE FIRST THING I SHOULD
READ?
>> WITHOUT QUESTION THE DAILY
CALLER'S MORNING E MAIL
WRITTEN BY MYSELF.
IT IS FULL OF INFORMATION AND
HOPEFULLY SOME LAUGHS.
GO TO THE DAILY CALLER.COM AND
SIGN UP.
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IS GOING
ON UNLESS YOU READ IT IN THE
MORNING FIRST THING.
>> I ACTUALLY DO.
SO I DON'T HAVE TO SIGN UP?
>> YOU DON'T UNLESS YOU HAVE
READ IT.
>> I READ IT EVERY DAY.
>> I USED TO.
JESSE, HAVE YOU SHOWS THIS
WEEKEND?
>> I DO.
I AM BACK IN MY HOMETOWN,
PITTSBURGH.
I AM DOING TWO SHOWS ON
SATURDAY, AT 8:00 AND 10:00.
IT IS THE GRAND OPENING OF
THAT PLACE.
GO TO IT.
>> EXCELLENT.
BACK TO YOU, GREG.
>> MULLINSES, EH?
DON'T HAVE A JOKE.
I WISH IT WAS MULLETS.