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>> When you find that your kids are changing their behavior
in connection with digital technology, recognize
that there may be an underlying problem
and that problem may be a cyber bully, so if you see
that they're turning off their cell phones or ignoring calls
and text messages, they're suddenly not sleeping
with the cell phone that they tend to take to bed with them,
if they're off of Facebook suddenly or off of some
of the other websites, in all likelihood it's
because something painful is coming
through those technologies.
You should report the abuse to the website that it occurred on.
So some websites make this very easy they have a big link
or a button on the screen where you can report abuse.
In many websites you can send an e-mail to abuse
@ the website name and those are pretty easy ways
to report it.
>> You can download before it's removed whatever's on Facebook.
You can download text messages.
You make sure you have that back-up.
>> I think that many parents their first instinct is
to cut off electronics, so to take away the mobile device,
to cut off the Internet access, that is --
you usually want to wait and be very judicious and careful
about doing that because what you don't want
to do is you don't want to punish you child
for telling you about something.
You don't want to set up a situation
where they're being threatened or bullied online
and now they're not going to tell you about it
because they're afraid you're going to take away their toys.
>> I think of that as the Lucius Malfoy Test,
the Harry Potter series, Draco Malfoy, rotten kid protected
in the beginning by his bullying father Lucius.
If you go to Lucius Malfoy
and say "Your kid Draco's a bully." Bad move.
>> If you're very, very angry
and upset you might not accomplish anything by talking
to them you might actually make the situation worse
if you get them then angry at you and their child angry
at your child, so I guess the bottom line
about contacting other parents is that be careful
if you're going to do it and really think
about it before you do it.
Even if the school can't resolve a situation for you, even
if they can't discipline another student who is acting
out online, they can help your child. They can help
support them.
And the fact is that one of the things we found
in our research is that most of the time
when it's happening online it's also happening in school.
It's crucial to get law enforcement involved if you want
to find out who's behind the cyberbullying attacks.
>> I've been all over the county.
I've been in the most affluent schools to the poorest schools,
blue collar schools, private schools,
and Catholic schools. All of our kids,
most of our kids getting younger
and younger they all have this technology, and while a lot
of them are doing appropriate things, a lot of them are not,
so regardless of the school, we're having issues
with bullying, cyberbullying and sexting in all of our schools.
>> We were once working with a group of kids
and in a school setting and a girl raised her hand
and she said, but if I wait 24 hours I'll forget about it,
and we said, right, that's the point.