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How to Break Up Long Distance. Breaking up is hard to do -- especially if your lover
lives far away. Do it graciously with these tips. You will need Honesty Consideration
and civility. Step 1. End things as soon as you realize it's over for you. Don't let your
partner go on thinking everything is fine just because you don't have to face them any
time soon. Step 2. Consider the length of the relationship. If it's been less than a
year, a telephone call may suffice. Longer than that, and the honorable thing is to tell
them in person, if at all possible. Don't wait until their next visit to end things.
They won't appreciate that they invested time and money to get dumped. Step 3. Weigh the
circumstances. If the relationship has been petering out on both sides for a while, there's
probably no need to make a big song and dance about it. You might even be able to start
the conversation with a direct but kindly worded e-mail. Texting the news is not appropriate
under any circumstances. Step 4. Follow the same rules of civility that apply to a non-long-distance
relationship: Don't ditch them close to their birthday, Valentine's Day, or the winter holidays.
Step 5. If you're breaking the news by phone, make sure you're in a quiet place with good
reception; a bad connection or dropped call will only add to the agony on both sides.
Step 6. Return their stuff, packing it with care. It's the least you can do. Did you know
One study of long-distance and geographically close couples found that about 40 percent
of people in either group eventually break up.