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IT'S ALL CLEAR TO ME NOW. IT IS SO *** OBVIOUS.
YOU CAN'T BELIEVE THE GOVERNMENT
AND THE JIVE CONVENTIONAL WISDOM.
I MEAN, HOW *** NAIVE ARE YOU, HUH?
WE ALL KNOW THE ALIENS CRASHED IN ROSWELL.
THE GOVERNMENT HAD TO COVER THAT UP
SO THERE WOULDN'T BE A PANIC.
JFK FOUND OUT,
SO ALIEN CHIEF LBJ AND THE GOVERNMENT
HAD TO KILL HIM.
YEARS LATER, WHILE LOOKING AT A FOLDED DOLLAR BILL
WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS,
PRINCESS DIANA FOUND OUT
THE TRUTH ABOUT US NEVER GOING TO THE MOON.
"ASTRONAUTS."
YEAH, RIGHT.
THEY WERE PROFESSIONAL MIMES HIRED TO FAKE THAT MOONWALK.
QUEEN ELIZABETH HAD TO HAVE PRINCESS DI KNOCKED OFF.
DID YOU NOTICE HER NICKNAME WAS "DI"?
HOW *** STUPID DO THEY THINK WE ARE?
WHEN THE GOVERNMENT FOUND OUT
THAT PENN AND TELLER KNEW THE TRUTH,
THEY DID SOMETHING WORSE THAN BUMPING US OFF--
THEY STUCK US IN THIS SUCKY TIME SLOT.
THEY COVERED ALL THEIR TRACKS,
AND IF IT WEREN'T A PERFECT CONSPIRACY,
WE'D HAVE SOME EVIDENCE.
WE'RE PENN AND TELLER,
AND CONSPIRACY THEORIES ARE ***!
Penn: THIS *** EPISODE IS FILLED
WITH CONSPIRACY THEORY WHACK JOBS WHO ARE LUDICROUS,
OFFENSIVE, AND SADLY MISGUIDED ALL AT ONCE.
WE'LL MEET A GUY WHO THINKS 9/11 WAS A GOVERNMENT PLOT.
WHAT A *** SHITBAG.
AND THIS GUY IS SHITTIER AND CRAZIER...
WE'LL MEET THIS LOON WHO SAYS
WE NEVER LANDED ON THE MOON.
WE'LL ALSO MEET A CRAZY-*** RADIO DJ,
A SELF-PROCLAIMED EXPERT ON THE JFK ASSASSINATION,
AND A COUPLE OF DRUNKS IN A BAR.
WHAT MORE COULD YOU ASK FOR?
I'M CLYDE LEWIS, AND THIS IS GROUND ZERO.
Penn: MEET CLYDE LEWIS. HE'S A DJ, AND YEAH,
ALL RADIO STATIONS DO LOOK LIKE ***.
MR. LEWIS IS HOSTING A RADIO SHOW
ALL ABOUT CONSPIRACIES CALLED GROUND ZERO.
THE MORE YOU START INVESTIGATING CONSPIRACY THEORIES,
THE MORE YOU REALIZE THAT THERE IS A CONSPIRACY.
AND THE CONSPIRACY IS
IS THAT THEY ARE OUT TO KILL YOU.
WHEN HE'S NOT SCARING PEOPLE THROUGH THE MAGIC OF RADIO,
LEWIS IS SCARING PEOPLE AT THIS OREGON BAR.
HE'S THE EMCEE OF THIS WEEKLY GATHERING OF CONSPIRACY THEORISTS.
THINK OF IT AS KARAOKE NIGHT FOR WHACK JOBS.
THAT'S *** AMAZING!
ALL OF THE VIDEOS WE'VE SEEN OF OSAMA BIN LADEN
HAVE ALL BEEN BLURRY OR, YOU KNOW, NEBULOUS AT BEST,
KIND OF RIGHT IN THERE WITH THE VIDEOS OF BIGFOOT...
Penn: THAT'S WHAT YOU GET WITH AN 8-DRINK MINIMUM.
YOUR BRAIN IS BEING TOYED WITH.
YOU GOTTA HANG ON TO WHAT YOU KNOW,
AND DON'T LET ANYBODY CHANGE IT.
THE MOST IMPORTANT RESOURCE OF ALL
IS YOUR COGNITIVE LIBERTY.
GET THE VERSION OUT THERE THAT YOU HAVE.
IF IT'S WRONG,
THEN WE MOVE ON AND GO TO ANOTHER VERSION.
AND WE TRY TO DECONSTRUCT EVERYTHING.
IF YOU CAN DECONSTRUCT IT, PUT IT TOGETHER AGAIN,
AND IT STILL FLIES, THEN YOU HAVE A STORY.
Penn: ACCORDING TO A RECENT POLL,
49.3 PERCENT OF ALL THE PEOPLE IN NEW YORK
BELIEVE THAT OUR LEADERS
KNEW THE 9/11 ATTACKS WERE PLANNED,
AND THAT THEY INTENTIONALLY FAILED TO ACT.
AND LOTS OF PEOPLE BELIEVE
WE DIDN'T EVEN LAND ON THE MOON.
AND THAT JFK IT WASN'T KILLED BY THIS GUY,
BUT BY THIS GUY. OR EVEN THIS GUY.
ARE 49.3% OF US JUST *** CRAZY?
PEOPLE ARE FUNDAMENTALLY SKEPTICAL.
PEOPLE DON'T TRUST
THE EXPLANATIONS THEY HAVE.
MY NAME IS JODI DEAN,
AND I'M THE CHAIR OF THE POLITICAL SCIENCE DEPARTMENT
AT HOBART AND WILLIAM SMITH COLLEGES.
THIS MISTRUST OF AN OFFICIAL EXPLANATION
MOTIVATES THEM TO GO LOOKING FURTHER,
AND THEN THEY WANT TO KEEP GOING
AND KEEP GOING AND KEEP GOING
AND FIND OUT WHAT THEY THINK COULD BE
A MORE CONVINCING EXPLANATION.
Penn: BEING SKEPTICAL IS GOOD,
BUT LOOKING AT THIS
AND HAVING YOUR FIRST THOUGHTS BE,
"THIS IS A HOAX STAGED BY THE GOVERNMENT,"
WELL, THAT TAKES A SPECIAL KIND OF ***.
NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME THAT OUR PRESIDENT
DID NOT HIRE SAUDI NATIONALS
WITH SAUDI PASSPORTS
TO COME OVER TO THIS COUNTRY
AND FLY AIRPLANES INTO THOSE BUILDINGS
TO GIVE HIM A MANDATE
TO GO OVER AND INVADE IRAQ
AS HE HAD PLANNED.
"NOBODY CAN CONVINCE ME"?
BELLS SHOULD GO OFF IN YOUR HEAD
WHEN YOU HEAR THOSE WORDS.
THAT'S HIS *** IDEA OF SKEPTICISM.
A REAL SKEPTIC DEMANDS TO BE CONVINCED
WITH EVIDENCE.
WE SHOULD BE SKEPTICAL OF THE GOVERNMENT,
BUT WE SHOULDN'T JUST MAKE *** UP.
WE HATE SHOWING THIS 9/11 FOOTAGE.
WE SHOULD NEVER HAVE TO SEE THIS AGAIN,
BUT IT'S IMPORTANT TO NIP
THIS *** PARANOID FANTASY
BEFORE IT TAKES ROOT IN THE NATIONAL CONSCIENCE
AND OLIVER STONE MAKES A *** MOVIE ABOUT IT.
IF ANYBODY KNOWS 9/11 CONSPIRACIES ARE ***,
IT'S THIS GUY.
HE'S DAN DALY, THE RETIRED FIRE CHIEF
FROM THE FIRE STATION CLOSEST TO THE TWIN TOWERS,
AND HE WAS THERE ON 9/11
AND LOST 50 FRIENDS WHEN THE TOWERS COLLAPSED.
Dan Daly: ON SEPTEMBER 11th, I WAS HOME.
IT WAS--IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL MORNING.
AND I RECEIVED A PHONE CALL FROM A FRIEND OF MINE
WHO SAID, "GO INSIDE AND TURN ON A TV."
AND I SAID, "WHY?" HE SAID, "JUST TURN IT ON."
SO I WENT INSIDE AND I TURNED ON A TV
AND I SAW WHAT MILLIONS OF AMERICANS SAW.
Woman: OH, MY GOODNESS! OH, MY GOODNESS!
SO I IMMEDIATELY WENT INTO MY CAR
AND DROVE TO MY FIREHOUSE
WHERE I ASSEMBLED A TEAM OF MEN,
AND WE MADE OUR WAY DOWN TO GROUND ZERO.
EVERYTHING WAS COVERED WITH A HALF INCH OF--
OF THIS VERY THICK DUST,
AND PEOPLE WERE RUNNING AROUND COVERED WITH BLOOD.
Penn: AND BEFORE THE DUST HAD SETTLED,
THE CONSPIRACY THEORIES
WERE ALREADY RISING FROM THE ASHES.
I THINK 9/11 WAS NOT WHAT THE GOVERNMENT SAID.
THE EVENTS ACTUALLY HAPPENED.
THERE WERE AIRPLANE CRASHES.
THERE WERE PEOPLE DEAD.
BUT IT WAS NOT AS THE GOVERNMENT TELLS US.
ERIC HUFSCHMID, SOFTWARE DEVELOPER.
Penn: AND DEVELOPER OF ONE OF THE SOFTEST PILES
OF STEAMING *** IN THE HISTORY OF PARANOIA.
HE WROTE A BOOK CALLED
PAINFUL QUESTIONS:
AN ANALYSIS OF THE SEPTEMBER 11TH ATTACK.
WE SHOW YOU THE COVER
BECAUSE IF YOU EVER SEE ANYONE CARRYING IT,
PUSH THEM DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS.
IN A NUTSHELL,
WHAT HAPPENED ON SEPTEMBER 11th,
IT LOOKS LIKE SOME PEOPLE WITHIN
THE GOVERNMENT FOOLED A LOT OF THE OTHERS.
THEY DECIDED TO RUN A FAKE TERRORIST ATTACK.
Penn: SO, 9/11 WASN'T A REAL CONSPIRACY.
IT WAS A FAKE CONSPIRACY COOKED UP
BY A DIFFERENT REAL CONSPIRACY.
OK, WHAT'S YOUR PROOF?
WHY, I DON'T KNOW.
BUT THEY APPARENTLY-- SOMEHOW THE ARABS
WERE SENT TO FLIGHT SCHOOLS...
Penn: UH-HUH...
TO PRETEND THAT THEY WERE FLYING ...
OK...
THEN THEY ARRANGED SOME SORT
OF POSSIBLY REMOTE- CONTROLLED AIRPLANES
TO DO THE ACTUAL WORK
OF FLYING INTO THE TOWERS...
AND HITTING THE PENTAGON,
CREATING WHAT SEEMS TO BE
AN ATTACK BY ARABS.
Penn: WOW. DID YOU DO THAT HARD-HITTING DATA RESEARCH
IN YOUR ***?
I FIND IT ABSOLUTELY UNBELIEVABLE
THAT ANYONE IN OUR GOVERNMENT
COULD HAVE SUCH A HEINOUS OR EVIL PLOT
TO STRIKE THEIR OWN PEOPLE.
I'M JIMMY WALTER, A PATRIOT FIGHTING
THE REAL TERRORISTS BEHIND 9/11.
Penn: AND THEN THERE'S THIS ***.
MAN, THAT'S WAY TOO SOFT. LET ME TRY THAT AGAIN.
AND THEN THERE'S THIS ***!
ALL I KNOW IS THAT THERE ARE EYEWITNESSES
OF THE PLANE HITTING IN NEW YORK
AND AT THE PENTAGON THAT SAY THE PLANES HAD NO WINDOWS
AND WERE THE WRONG SIZE, AND DID NOT HAVE
AMERICAN AIRLINES MARKINGS ON THEM.
LITTLE JIMMY HAS THE MONEY AND RESOURCES
TO HAVE PURCHASED A FULL-PAGE AD
IN THE NEW YORK TIMES.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BET HE INHERITED THE MONEY?
WHAT'S YOUR EVIDENCE, MR. WALTER?
THE EVIDENCE WE HAVE INDICATES
THAT THE AIRCRAFT THAT TOOK OFF FROM BOSTON
WERE LANDED SECRETLY AT A MILITARY BASE,
REMOTELY PILOTED VEHICLES WERE CAUSED TO TAKE OFF,
AND THOSE REMOTELY-PILOTED VEHICLES
STRUCK ALL 3 BUILDINGS,
THE TWO TOWERS, AND THE PENTAGON.
AND DO ANY OF THE PEOPLE WHO SAY THAT
LIVE ANYWHERE BESIDES LITTLE JIMMY WALTER WORLD?
I FIRMLY BELIEVE THAT MANY OF THE ALLEGED PASSENGERS
ON THE ALLEGED HIJACKED AIRCRAFT ARE STILL ALIVE,
AND, QUITE FRANKLY, I THINK THEY WERE
PROBABLY ALL WORKING FOR THE GOVERNMENT.
Penn: *** YOU!
WE REALLY HOPE THIS ***-UP RUNS INTO
THE FAMILY OF SOMEONE WHO'S DIED
IN THESE HORRIBLE ATTACKS.
MOST OF THEM MIGHT NOT TAKE KINDLY
TO THE IDEA THAT DADDY IS FAKING HIS DEATH.
AND SO, IN THE TRADE TOWERS,
THEY PLANTED EXPLOSIVES ON EVERY FLOOR.
WE ACTUALLY SEE THESE PIECES COME UP AND DOWN
AND UP AND OVER. SEE THESE PIECES?
THAT'S COMING UP AND OVER. THAT'S NOT A COLLAPSE.
THOSE ARE EXPLOSIONS.
Penn: OK...
CONSPIRACY THEORISTS LIKE ALL SORTS OF THEORISTS
TAKE DISPARATE FACTS AND PUT THEM TOGETHER.
AND WHAT MAKES THE CONSPIRACY THEORIST
A LITTLE BIT DIFFERENT
IS THEY PUT THE FACTS TOGETHER
IN ALTERNATIVE WAYS
THAT ARE TINGED WITH A KIND OF PARANOIA.
Penn: JIMMY SEEMED RESPECTABLE, NICE SUIT AND ALL.
BUT THEN HE TOOK US OUTSIDE
TO SHOW US HIS FANCY CAR AND JUMPSUIT.
AND, WELL...
SOMETIMES YOU SHOULD JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER.
REPORTING NOT FOR DUTY, SIR.
[CHICKEN SCREAMING]
THIS IS GLENN CORBETT.
HE'S AN ASSISTANT FIRE CHIEF
AND AN ASSISTANT PROFESSOR OF FIRE SCIENCE.
PLUS, HE'S THE TECHNICAL EDITOR OF
FIRE ENGINEERING MAGAZINE.
HE KNOWS WHAT BROUGHT DOWN THE TOWERS,
AND IT WASN'T EXPLOSIVES.
THERE'S NO EVIDENCE THERE WERE ANY TYPE
OF EXPLOSIVE DEVICES OR BOMBS.
WHAT REALLY BROUGHT THE BUILDING DOWN
WAS THE FIRE.
Daly: WHEN YOU ENTER 10,000 GALLONS WORTH OF JET FUEL
INTO AN OFFICE BUILDING,
AND YOU HAVE STEEL TRUSS CONSTRUCTION
LIKE THE TRADE CENTERS DID,
THEY WARPED AND BENT AND GRADUALLY WAS MORE
THAN THE BUILDING COULD SUSTAIN.
Corbett: WHEN YOU LOOK AT WHAT THE PLANE BRINGS IN,
THERE ARE A SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF COMBUSTIBLE MATERIALS,
PLASTICS, AND, OF COURSE, ALL THE LUGGAGE, UH,
THE SEATS, ALL THOSE KIND OF THINGS.
BUT ALSO WHAT'S IN A NORMAL OFFICE BUILDING,
COMPUTERS, DESKS, CHAIRS, A LOT OF THOSE
ARE EITHER WOOD,
AND A LOT OF IT'S ACTUALLY HYDROCARBON-BASED PLASTICS
WHICH HAVE VERY HIGH RATES OF HEAT RELEASE,
WHICH, YOU KNOW, IN THIS CASE BURN
FOR A SUSTAINED PERIOD OF TIME OVER A VERY LARGE AREA.
Daly: EVERYTHING WAS VAPORIZED. EVERYTHING.
AND UNFORTUNATELY, SO WERE 2,800 PEOPLE.
Penn: AND THAT'S SOMETHING WE SHOULD NEVER FORGET IT.
BUT TO CONSPIRACY NUTS,
DEATH AND SUFFERING
ARE JUST HEART-POUNDING ENTERTAINMENT.
THEY WHACK TO TRAGEDY.
AND SO IT LOOKS LIKE WHAT HIT THE PENTAGON
IS SOME SORT OF UNMANNED DRONE.
BUILDING 7 WAS A CLASSIC IMPLOSION
WHERE THEY ONLY TOOK OUT THE CENTER COLUMNS.
WELL, WHAT HAPPENED IS THE ARABS WERE PATSIES.
THE EPA WAS CENSORED BY THE WHITE HOUSE
FOR MORNING THE PEOPLE OF MANHATTAN...
MY FIRST REACTION TO FLIGHT 93
IS THAT THE MILITARY,
AFTER THEY SAW THOSE TOWERS GET HIT
WERE THINKING, "WAIT A MINUTE,
"THAT'S NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
"WHAT IS THAT PLANE GOING TO DO?
SHOOT IT!"
I THINK PROFFERING CONSPIRACY THEORIES LIKE THAT
ARE AN INSULT TO-- TO THE PEOPLE WHO--
WHO LOST THEIR LIVES HERE.
Penn: BUT WHY DO THESE IDEAS--
IDEAS WITH NO BASIS IN FACT--
KEEP POPPING UP?
PEOPLE HATE THINKING ABOUT IN A FLASH OF AN EYE
TERRORIST BOMBERS CAN COME IN
AND CRASH INTO THE WORLD TRADE CENTER.
THEY WOULD RATHER SEE THAT, "OH, YES,
THERE WAS ALWAYS A SYSTEM."
THERE'S ALWAYS SOME OVERRIDING EXPLANATION
THAT CAN LET US MAKE SENSE OF THE WORLD.
WASN'T 9/11 ENOUGH OF A CONSPIRACY
TO MAKE THE THEORISTS HAPPY?
RELIGIOUS FANATICS DIRECTED BY GOD
CONSPIRED TO USE PLANES AS SUICIDE BOMBS,
THEY CONSPIRED TO DEMOLISH AN AMERICAN LANDMARK,
TO KILL THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE,
AND TO CRUSH THE ECONOMY, LIBERTY, AND SPIRIT
OF THE GREATEST NATION ON EARTH.
SO THEY DID IT ON A LOW-BUDGET
WITH PURE CUNNING AND PSYCHOTIC DETERMINATION.
DON'T THE CONSPIRACY NUTS REALIZE THAT SOMETIMES
SOMETHING SIMPLE AND SMALL AND CRAZY AND MEAN
CAN DESTROY SOMETHING BIG AND BEAUTIFUL?
Penn: LET'S GO BACK TO THAT POLITICAL SCIENCE BAR
IN OREGON AND SEE WHICH CRACKPOT
IS AT THE MIC NOW.
IT'S THAT FUNNY CLYDE LEWIS.
YOU KNOW, YOU TAKE A LOOK
AT THAT WHOLE SITUATION WITH THE MOON LANDING
AND YOU SAY TO YOURSELF,
"WHY HAVEN'T WE GONE BACK? "
Penn: THE MOON LANDING IS ANOTHER EVENT
THAT THE CONSPIRACY NUTS HAVE AN ALTERNATE TAKE ON.
Neil Armstrong: THAT'S ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN,
ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND.
SOME PEOPLE THINK QUITE ERRONEOUSLY
THAT THE APOLLO MOON LANDINGS WERE FAKED.
Penn: THAT'S PHIL PLAIT.
HE'S A NASA EDUCATION RESOURCE DIRECTOR
WITH A PhD IN ASTRONOMY,
AND HE CAN STAND STILL FOR LONG TIME.
SEE? HE KNOWS WHY THIS MOONWALK CONSPIRACY
CONTINUES TO FESTER.
HEH HEH. FESTER IS A KEY WORD
WITH CONSPIRACIES.
THEY, THEY SORT OF LIE UNDER THE ROCKS
AND WAIT AND THEY FESTER AND MOLD
AND THEN, YOU KNOW, YOU EXPOSE THEM TO LIGHT
AND MOST OF THEM GO AWAY.
AND, UNFORTUNATELY,
WITH THE MOON HOAX CONSPIRACY THEORY,
IT HASN'T GONE AWAY.
Penn: TO GET TO THE BOTTOM
OF THIS FAKED MOON LANDING STUFF,
WE HEAD TO RURAL INDIANA
TO THIS BEAUTIFUL PREFAB HOME.
IT'S JUST AROUND THE CORNER FROM MOON ROAD.
HERE, YOU'LL FIND THE PREMIER AUTHORITY
ON FAKING THE MOON LANDING.
HE'S RENE, AND YEAH,
HE'S GOT A ONE-WORD NAME AND WE KNOW
ABOUT PEOPLE LIKE THAT.
HE ALSO HOSTS ONE OF
THE MOST OUTRAGEOUS WEBSITES ON THE SUBJECT.
HE'S EVEN THE AUTHOR OF THIS BOOK--
NASA MOONED AMERICA.
ONE BOOK FINISHED.
Penn: HIS BOOK-- OR LARGE, HAMMERED,
PHOTOCOPIED PAMPHLET--
ABSOLUTELY PROVES THAT THE MOON LANDINGS
WERE FAKE, AT LEAST IN HIS MIND.
WALKING ON THE MOON IS IN THE SAME CATEGORY
AS THE TOOTH FAIRY AND SANTA CLAUS
AND THE EASTER BUNNY.
THERE IS NO POSSIBLE WAY,
CONCEIVABLE WAY THAT MAN
HAS EVER WALKED ON THE MOON.
NOT THEN, NOT NOW,
AND NOT TOMORROW OR NEXT YEAR, EITHER.
Penn: YOU'RE STAPLING YOUR BOOK TOGETHER BY HAND.
NO WONDER SPACE-AGE TECHNOLOGY
SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE TO YOU.
WHAT'S RENE'S BIG PROBLEM WITH THE MOON WALK?
THERE'S NO AIR ON THE MOON.
HOW DO YOU MAKE A FLAG FLUTTER?
SOMETIMES YOU'D SEE IT ON TV
AND IT DIDN'T MOVE.
AND SOMETIMES, THE FLAG WOULD FLUTTER.
Plait: EVERY TIME YOU SEE THAT FLAG WAVING,
THE ASTRONAUT'S HOLDING ONTO THE POLL
AND THEY'RE MOVING THIS THING BACK AND FORTH,
THAT'S WHY THE FLAG IS MOVING.
IT'S JUST THE CLOTH FLAPPING BACK AND FORTH
BECAUSE OF INERTIA.
I--I DON'T THINK SO.
BECAUSE YOU STAND THERE AND WATCH IT
AND IT WAS--I MEAN, SOMEBODY OPENED THE DOOR
ON THE SEALED-OFF SOUND STUDIO
AND AIR CAME RUSHING IN. WHOO...
IT'S ALL DONE ON A SOUND STAGE.
WHERE ELSE CAN YOU DO THIS?
CUT!
JESUS *** CHRIST, NEIL!
HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TRY THIS?
ONE SMALL STEP FOR A MAN!
NOT MAN!
A MAN, AND THAT'S YOU.
EVERYBODY, TAKE FIVE!
NEIL! PRACTICE YOUR *** LINE!
OH, YEAH-- "LET'S USE REAL PILOTS.
I WANNA USE REAL PILOTS."
FAKING THE MOON LANDING IS EASY.
YOU NEED DIRT, WARDROBE, A SOUND STAGE,
A LOT OF BLACK PAINT, SOME STUPID SUITS.
THE HARD PART IS SHUTTING PEOPLE UP.
IT'S BEEN 36 YEARS.
YOU THINK THE TECHNICIANS AND PROP PEOPLE,
CAMERA PEOPLE, DIRECTORS, EVERYONE WHO WORKS AT NASA,
AND THE JET PROPULSION LAB IN PASADENA,
AND ALL THE NICE FOLKS AT CAPE CANAVERAL IN FLORIDA,
PLUS MEMBERS OF THE U.S. CONGRESS AND THE WHITE HOUSE
ALL SHUT UP ABOUT THIS AMAZING COVER-UP
FOR ALL THAT TIME?
THE GOVERNMENT COULDN'T EVEN *** COVER UP A BREAK-IN
TO A PSYCHIATRIST'S OFFICE IN A *** CHEESY HOTEL.
WATERGATE IS THE ANSWER TO ALL THIS ***.
IF THEY COULDN'T COVER THAT UP,
THEY *** CAN'T DO ANYTHING.
BUT, RENE'S GOT PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.
ONE OF THE THINGS HE CLAIMS IS THAT THERE IS A ROCK
IN ONE OF THE PICTURES
THAT CLEARLY SHOWS THE LETTER "C" ON IT.
THE "C" ROCK, THAT'S A BEAUTY.
SEE MY LITTLE "C" RIGHT THERE?
THAT'S A CAPITAL "C." THAT'S A PROP "C."
THAT'S WHAT YOU USE WHEN YOU'RE MAKING SETS.
Penn: WHAT RENE IS REFERRING TO
IS THAT HE THINKS HOLLYWOOD ART DIRECTORS
LABEL PROPS WITH LETTERS
TO INDICATE WHERE THE PROPS GO.
YOU KNOW, THIS ISN'T OUR FIRST GOAT ***,
AND WE'VE NEVER SEEN PROPS LABELED WITH LETTERS.
RUDY HERE IS OUR ART DIRECTOR.
RUDY, YOU EVER SEEN PROPS LABELED WITH LETTERS?
*** NO.
WELL, I GUESS WE'RE PART OF THE COVER-UP NOW.
Penn: APPARENTLY, RENE, WHO CLEARLY KNOWS MORE
ABOUT PROPS THAN ANYONE AT ***
IS SURE THIS ROCK IS A MISPLACED PROP.
SOMEHOW, THIS GUY PUT THE "C" UP.
HE HAD A WHOLE BUNCH OF WAYS HE COULD HAVE PUT THAT ROCK,
BUT HE PUT IT WITH THE "C" UP
BECAUSE THAT IS A DEFINITE CAPITAL "C."
SO THE PROP MAN BLEW IT.
THIS IS NOT THE MOON. THIS IS A SET. PERIOD.
Penn: THAT RENE SURE HAS A KEEN EYE FOR MISTAKES.
DON'T FORGET TO SWEEP THE "CHIMEY."
ALL OF THIS SPACE TALK CAN MAKE A MAN PARCHED,
SO IT'S BREAK TIME.
ANNIE, BRING ME A BOTTLE OF WATER. CAN I GET A DRINK?
GIMME. JEEZ.
Penn: HE KEEPS HIS WATER IN A *** BOTTLE
AND LABELS IT WITH A CAPITAL "V."
BUT LET'S GET BACK TO THAT SUPPOSED PROP ROCK.
THIS IS JUST A HAIR
THAT GOT CAUGHT IN THE NEGATIVE
WHEN THEY WERE MAKING PRINTS OF THIS PICTURE.
IN THIS ORIGINAL NEGATIVE,
YOU CAN SEE THAT THAT ROCK IS NOT LABELED "C."
THE HAIR WASN'T IN THERE.
SO THIS IS JUST A RIDICULOUS CLAIM.
Penn: AND HERE'S ANOTHER ONE.
THEY NEVER ONCE TOOK A PICTURE OF THE STARS.
TO THIS DAY, THEY NEVER EVEN MENTION THE STARS.
NOW, THE ASTRONAUTS DID NOT GO TO THE MOON
TO TAKE PICTURES OF THE SKY.
THEY WENT TO THE MOON TO TAKE PICTURES--
OF THE MOON, RIGHT?
AND IT'S LIT UP BY THE SUN.
THE SUN IS UP.
AND SO THEY TOOK PICTURES
WITH FILM SET FOR DAYLIGHT SURROUNDING.
THE LANDSCAPE WAS EXPOSED CORRECTLY,
BUT THE SKY TURNS OUT BLACK.
Penn: AND HERE'S ANOTHER ONE.
THE LAST LUNAR MISSION WAS LIKE 13 DAYS OR SOMETHING.
AND THERE'S NO BATHROOMS IN THESE THINGS.
WHAT ARE THEY WEARING, DIAPERS FOR 13 DAYS?
Penn: WELL, ACTUALLY, THEY WENT PEE PEE
INTO THIS HUMONGOUS ***.
AND FOR POOPIE,
THEY USED THIS ADHESIVE *** GASKET.
[WHISPERING] But we're not supposed to talk about that.
NASA says it's not very heroic.
ALTHOUGH, ANYONE WHO CAN *** INTO THAT THING
GOING 24,000 MILES AN HOUR IS A HERO TO ME.
Man: SO IS THIS THE MOON?
[GIGGLING]
[SIGHS]
SURE IT IS.
Plait: YOU KNOW, RENEE AND THESE OTHER GUYS,
THEY'VE NEVER LIFTED A FINGER TO DO ANY REAL RESEARCH.
THEY MAKE THESE CLAIMS, THEY BEAT THEIR CHESTS,
AND THEY'RE WRONG. THEY'RE WRONG.
Penn: RENE SAYS THE BIGGEST TIP-OFF
THAT THE WHOLE MISSION WAS A CON JOB
WAS WHEN THE ASTRONAUTS GOT BACK HOME.
HOW WOULD THEY ACT
AFTER LYING TO THE ENTIRE WORLD
ABOUT WALKING ON THE MOON?
I HAVE A PICTURE WHERE PRESIDENT NIXON
IS INTERVIEWING ON THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER
WHEN THEY'RE IN THE SO-CALLED "ISOLATION CHAMBER."
THIS IS THEIR PRESIDENT.
AND THEY'RE LIKE, "WHAT HAVE WE DONE?
THAT'S OUR COMMANDER IN CHIEF."
YOU KNOW, LIKE KIDS HANGING THEIR HEAD IN SHAME.
Penn: OR MAYBE THEY'RE A LITTLE TIRED AND GRUMPY
FROM FLYING 500,000 MILES IN 8 DAYS IN A TIN CAN
AND *** IN A BAG.
MAYBE THEY'RE NOT UP TO LISTENING TO SPEECHES
FROM THAT *** NIXON.
HERE'S HOW THEY LOOKED WHEN THE NIXON SPEECH WAS OVER.
WHEN YOU SEE SOMETHING AMAZING,
YOU EXPECT THE EXPLANATION TO BE EQUALLY AMAZING.
WE WERE SHOOTING SOME STUPID TV SHOW IN INDIA,
WE SAW FAKIR, A STREET PERFORMER,
DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS.
OUR CANADIAN FILM CREW FIGURED THE MAGICIAN MIGHT
BE DOING IT BY MEDITATION.
THEY DIDN'T CONSIDER SHOES ON STICKS.
BUT IN THE REAL WORLD, SHOES ON STICKS
OR SOMETHING EQUALLY MUNDANE IS OFTEN THE ANSWER.
THE ASSASSINATION OF JOHN F. KENNEDY
STILL CAPTURES THE AMERICAN IMAGINATION
40 YEARS LATER.
AND THIS IS WHERE IT ALL TOOK PLACE--
DEALEY PLAZA IN DALLAS.
IT'S WHERE WE MET UP WITH THIS GUY.
Jim Marrs: PRESIDENT KENNEDY WAS KILLED
IN A MILITARY-STYLE AMBUSH
AUTHORIZED BY PEOPLE IN VERY HIGH POSITIONS.
Penn: HE'S AUTHOR-TEACHER- CONSPIRACY EXPERT JIM MARRS.
HE'S WRITTEN MANY BOOKS--
OK, SOME OF THEM ARE ABOUT PSYCHIC WARFARE AND ALIENS,
BUT HE ALSO WROTE CROSSFIRE: THE PLOT THAT KILLED KENNEDY,
WHICH SHE CLAIMS BLOWS THE LID OFF THE LONE GUNMAN THEORY.
HE SAYS A LOT OF PEOPLE AGREE WITH HIM.
THE POLLS SHOW THAT ABOUT 85% OF THOSE RESPONDING
BELIEVE THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON
OTHER THAN JUST THE COINCIDENTAL MEETING
OF A LONE NUT AND THE PRESIDENT.
Penn: IF THE CONSPIRACY IS SO BIG AND EVIL,
WHY HASN'T IT KILLED JIM?
AND HOW DID CRAZY OLLIE STONE'S MOVIE COME OUT?
THE CONSPIRACY CAN KILL THE PRESIDENT,
BUT CAN'T STOP A *** MOVIE MAKER
AND NUTS LIKE THIS?
I'M CONVINCED THAT JFK WAS ASSASSINATED
BY OUR GOVERNMENT,
AND THAT EVERY TIME A NEW PRESIDENT
HAS BEEN ELECTED SINCE,
THEY TAKE THEM INTO A QUIET LITTLE ROOM
AND THE 12 CORPORATE *** THAT REALLY RUN THIS COUNTRY,
YOU KNOW, SITTING THERE, AND IT'S SMOKY,
AND A SCREEN COMES DOWN AND YOU GET TO SEE
A SHOT OF THE KENNEDY ASSASSINATION
FROM THE ANGLE OF THE GRASSY KNOLL.
THE SCREEN ROLLS BACK UP,
AND THE CORPORATE HEADS LOOK AT THE NEW PRESIDENT
AND SAY, "DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS?"
TO WHICH HE RESPONDS, "WHAT'S MY AGENDA?"
Penn: WE'VE GOT AN AGENDA FOR YOU.
IT'S THREE WORDS--ACTUALLY, TWO WORDS AND A HYPHEN--
NON-ALCOHOLIC BEER.
WHEN YOU STOP TO THINK ABOUT IT,
WITH ALL THE PEOPLE THAT THE CONSPIRACY THEORISTS
THINK WERE INVOLVED, ALL THE GROUPS,
HOW COME NOT ONE WORD HAS SURFACED
IN OVER 40 YEARS?
THIS IS VINCENT BUGLIOSI.
AS THE LOS ANGELES D.A.,
HE PROSECUTED NUT BAR-SLASH- ASPIRING BEACH BOY
CHARLIE MANSON.
NOW, HE'S WORKING ON A BOOK DEBUNKING JFK CONSPIRACIES.
INSTINCTIVELY, PEOPLE FIND IT
INTELLECTUALLY INCONGRUOUS
THAT THIS COULD ALL HAPPEN BECAUSE OF SOME LONE NUT.
DO YOU THINK THAT JUST ONE DAY,
LEE HARVEY OSWALD WOKE UP AND HE SAID,
"I'M JUST GONNA GO SHOOT THE PRESIDENT TODAY? "
Penn: YES. BUT THAT'S NOT A VERY SEXY ANSWER.
THEY FEEL THAT A GREAT PLOT
HAS TO BE RESPONSIBLE
FOR BRINGING DOWN A GREAT MAN.
I POSITIVELY KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THIS SITUATION HERE.
I WOULD LIKE HAVE, UH, LEGAL REPRESENTATION.
Penn: MEET TOM BOWDEN.
HE'S CURATOR OF THE DALLAS CONSPIRACY MUSEUM.
IT'S LIKE THE MAGIC BULLET KINGDOM
FOR CONSPIRACY BUFFS, PEOPLE WHO LOVE PEOPLE
WHO WANTED TO BLOW KENNEDY'S HEAD OFF.
TOM SUMS UP THE OFFICIAL ACCOUNT.
THE WARREN COMMISSION SAID OSWALD FIRED 3 SHOTS USING
A MANNLICHER-CARCANO RIFLE.
Penn: FROM THIS WINDOW ON THE SIXTH FLOOR
OF THE TEXAS BOOK DEPOSITORY.
THE FIRST SHOT HIT THE CURB,
AND THE SECOND SHOT WENT THROUGH KENNEDY'S BACK,
CAME OUT HIS NECK...
Penn: AND THEN CONTINUED INTO THE BODY
OF TEXAS GOVERNOR JOHN CONNOLLY,
SEATED IN FRONT OF KENNEDY.
AND THE THIRD SHOT CAME
FROM THE SAME WINDOW
AND HIT KENNEDY IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD.
Penn: IT'S THAT SECOND BULLET
THAT'S CAUSED SO MUCH CONTROVERSY.
CONSPIRACY THEORISTS SAY
THAT A SINGLE BULLET COULDN'T HAVE CAUSED
SO MANY INJURIES TO PRESIDENT KENNEDY
AND GOVERNOR CONNOLLY.
THAT SKEPTICISM HAS LED TO CALLING
THAT SINGLE BULLET THEORY "THE MAGIC BULLET THEORY."
WHICH SAYS THAT A BULLET COMING
FROM 60 FEET IN THE AIR
AT A STEEP DOWNWARD TRAJECTORY
STRIKES THE MAN BELOW THE SHOULDER BLADES
SOMEHOW BEGINS TO COURSE UPWARDS,
AND EXITS OUT HIS THROAT,
WHICH WOULD THEN BE, OF COURSE,
AN UPWARD TRAJECTORY,
SOMEHOW TWISTS IN MID-AIR,
COMES BACK DOWN,
AND STRIKES THE MAN IN FRONT OF HIM,
SHATTERING HIS FIFTH RIB,
EXITING OUT HIS RIGHT CHEST,
ENDS UP OVER IN HIS LEFT THIGH.
IT'S A FAIRY TALE.
Penn: BUT BUGLIOSI KNOWS THE REAL REASON
THE MAGIC BULLET ISN'T MAGIC,
AND IT ALL HAS TO DO WITH THE SEATING ARRANGEMENT
IN JFK's LIMO.
THEY PLACE-- I'M TALKING ABOUT
THE CONSPIRACY THEORISTS--
THEY PLACE CONNOLLY
IN THE PRESIDENTIAL LIMOUSINE
SEATED DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF KENNEDY.
THE ONLY PROBLEM IS THAT CONNOLLY
WAS NOT SEATED DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF KENNEDY.
HE WAS SEATED TO KENNEDY'S LEFT FRONT.
Penn: SO THE SO-CALLED "MAGICAL PATH"
THAT THE SECOND BULLET TOOK WAS IN FACT MUCH STRAIGHTER
THAN THE CONSPIRACY THEORISTS WHAT TO ADMIT.
BUT CONSPIRACY NUTS ALSO SAY IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE
FOR OSWALD TO FIRE THE 3 SHOTS
IN THE 5.6 SECONDS THEY CALCULATE
THE SHOTS WERE FIRED IN.
Bowden: HE COULDN'T SHOOT 3 SHOTS IN 5.6 SECONDS.
AND DO IT ACCURATELY.
Penn: AND THEN THERE'S
THE WAY KENNEDY'S HEAD
JERKS WHEN HE'*** BY THE FATAL SHOT.
THEY SAY THAT THE PRESIDENT GOES FORWARD,
WHEN IN REALITY HE FALLS BACKWARD
WHEN THE WHOLE THING TAKES PLACE.
Penn: WHICH, TO CONSPIRACY THEORISTS,
MEANS THERE MUST HAVE BEEN A SECOND GUNMAN
IN FRONT OF THE PRESIDENT'S CAR
BEHIND THE FENCE ON THE GRASSY KNOLL.
THIS IS A MANNLICHER-CARCANO RIFLE,
THE EXACT MAKE AND MODEL AS THE ONE
LEE HARVEY OSWALD USED.
ITS BOLT-ACTION AND NEEDS TO BE COCKED
BETWEEN EVERY SHOT.
NOW, VINCENT BUGLIOSI AND OTHER RATIONAL FOLKS SAY
THAT THE GUNMAN ACTUALLY HAD AS MUCH AS 8 SECONDS,
BUT FOR THIS TEST,
WE'LL LET THE NUTS HAVE THE 5.6 SECONDS THEY CLAIM.
SO, CAN 3 SHOTS BE FIRED IN 5.6 SECONDS?
TELLER, TIME ME.
FIRE! ***, AIM...
FIRE! ***, AIM...
FIRE! WHAT DO WE HAVE?
UH, 3.45 SECONDS.
THAT WAS EASY, AND I HAD NO MARINE TRAINING.
NEXT, WILL PUT SOME REAL LIVE BULLETS
INTO THIS RIFLE AND SHOW YOU HOW
KENNEDY'S HEAD, THROUGH BASIC PRINCIPLES OF PHYSICS,
WOULD HAVE *** TOWARD THE SHOT
RATHER THAN FORWARD.
TO SIMULATE A HEAD,
TELLER HAS WRAPPED A HONEYDEW MELON
WITH ONE-INCH WIDE FIBERGLASS TAPE.
WHY HONEYDEW?
WERE SHOWING OFF. IT'S WHAT OSWALD HAD
FOR BREAKFAST ON NOVEMBER 22nd, 1963.
WHY ONE-INCH FIBERGLASS TAPE?
AGAIN, WE'RE SHOWING OFF.
IT'S THE SAME KIND OF TAPE
THAT NOBEL PRIZE-WINNING PHYSICIST
AND PERSONAL BODY OF JFK,
DR. LUIS W. ALVAREZ USED
WHEN HE FIRST PRESENTED THIS APPALLINGLY APPROPRIATE DEMO
AT THE LAWRENCE BERKELEY LABORATORIES.
A PILL BOX HAT ON THE SECOND MELON
WAS OUR IDEA.
THE ONE-INCH WIDE TAPE IS THE SKULL FOR OUR MELON.
DR. LUIS EXPLAINED THAT A BULLET
PENETRATING A SKULL DOESN'T TRANSFER
MUCH OF ITS ENERGY TO THE HEAD.
IT'S A TINY HOLE, SLIDES RIGHT IN.
THE BRAIN DOESN'T PRESENT MUCH RESISTANCE.
BUT WHEN THE BULLET POPS OUT THE OTHER SIDE,
IT PULLS A LOT OF BRAIN,
OR IN THIS CASE, MELON GOO, WITH IT.
THE BULLET AND GOO MAKE A LITTLE JET BLAST
THAT PUSHES THE MELON HEAD IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION.
WATCH.
SECOND GUNMEN MY ACHING ***.
Bugliosi: THIS IS THE MOST INTENSIVE INVESTIGATION
OF ANY CRIME IN WORLD HISTORY,
BUT NO ONE HAS COME UP WITH ANY HARD,
SUBSTANTIVE, CREDIBLE EVIDENCE
THAT THERE WAS A CONSPIRACY.
Dean: PEOPLE WHAT MEANING.
PEOPLE WANT AN EXPLANATION FOR THEIR LIVES.
AND A CONSPIRACY THEORY PROVIDES THAT.
EVERYTHING THAT'S IN HERE, THEY CAN'T GET TO YET,
AND DON'T LET THEM GET IT AT ALL.
IT'S IMPORTANT,
AND THAT'S WHY WE'RE HERE AT GROUND ZERO LOUNGE.
GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY, AND THANK YOU.
Penn: WE DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH CLAMORING THERE IS
TO GET INTO YOUR SORRY AHEAD, CLYDE,
BUT THIS IS OUR SHOW,
AND YOU DON'T GET THE LAST WORD.
ON BEHALF OF MY FELLOW FIREFIGHTERS
AND THE RESCUE WORKERS AT GROUND ZERO,
I WANT TO THANK ALL THE AMERICAN PEOPLE
THAT CAME AND GAVE US A HAND.
AND I JUST WANTED TO SAY,
THANK YOU.
WE WILL NEVER FORGET YOUR KINDNESS.
[WIND BLOWING]
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--