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- Hi, Selina. - Hey.
- Just a small change in the speech. - What is that?
Plastics apparently talked to the president.
The White House doesn't want us mentioning oil or Cornstarch or plastic.
Just wing it.
This has been pencil-*** completely?
Uh, yes, front and back. Very little romance.
That's the entire speech, okay?
What's left here? I've got "hello"
and I have Preposions.
Well, you could talk about your boat.
- Or something like that. - Sure, talk about the boat.
Gary, seriously, can you just shut up for 10 seconds?
Okay, now I can't read what you're writing.
Relax, you're really good at Senate vote reform.
Hit that one. That's a home run.
That's your "Sergeant Pepper's."
We can also use my kitten heels gag.
- All right. Is that funny? - No.
It's funny enough for these people.
- Hit the verbs. - Thank you, I've got it.
It's fine, I can do it. I can't I don't know what that is.
Please welcome Vice President Selina Meyer.
- Go for the money. - It's just pennies.
Hey.
Hi. Oh!
Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests,
as I'm sure you're aware,
I have stepped into the president's shoes this evening,
and, uh
Who knew he wore kitten heels?
( Laughs )
Selina: No, he of course doesn't.
He's more of a stilettos kind of guy.
( Chuckles )
Um
( Stammers )
All kidding aside,
I am reminded tonight
of the late senator David Reeves.
He died.
He's he's dead now.
And I remember dear David
talking to the president and myself
about the absurdity of allowing
multiple filibusters on a single bill.
And
Politics is about people.
It's about people.
- Uh - Is your guy gonna be tweeting about this?
( Crowd laughs )
Okay, well, let me put it this way, Sam,
that guy is no longer in a position to pay his iPhone contract.
( All chuckle )
That's because Mike McClintock there threw him into the Potomac River.
( Laughs )
Oh, boy. It seems with that Cornstarch tweet,
we were hoist by our own retard.
( Laughing stops )
Uh, so
I know. I know. I know what I said.
It's the use of the word "retard."
- It's just not - But it was joke. It was joke.