Coltrane

ROSCO P. COLTRANE SPEAKING. (Rosco) HAVE YOU GOT YOUR EARS ? COME ON. THIS HERE'S DEPUTY CLETUS HAWKE, YOUR COUNTY MANNY. WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU, SHERIFF? LISTEN, CLETUS, SOME TERRIBLE PEOPLE...

HAZZARD SWAMP? YEAH, WHAT BETTER PLAE TO THROW A PHONY RADAR GUN AND GET RID OF THE EVIDENCE? THERE GOES ANY CHANCE I HD OF GETTING MY LAND MONEY. OH, WE JUST GOTTA STOP 'EM. IF...

Where the devil are you? Rosco? Oh. Come on. Come on. Man, I'm worn to a nub. I gotta have a little slurp of this. Listen, we gotta go. I know where the Dukes are. Yes, I do. They're...

(Balladeer) THE HAZZARD DERBY MAY BE THE ONLY RACE IN THE WORLD WHERE YOU FIGHT FOR THE BEST POSITION TO GET CLOBBERED. [tires screeching] NOW, THE REASON THIS RACECOURSE WAS SO TREACHEROUS IS BECAUSE...

[CELL PHONE RINGS] Hey, you gotta give me a minute. I don't have a minute! What are we doing? Uh...let me get back to you. Hey, Cassie. Hey, it's Sam. Okay, I need some information,...

*INDIAN SITAR MUSIC* Okay, so everybody's looking forward; grabbing their right foot... And we're going to LIFT our hearts and look at the left hand. Everybody's looking...

[birds chirping] YOU BETTER GET GOING, DON'T WANNA LOSE THEM AGAIN. YOU TWO THIEVES, HOLD IT RIGHT THERE. (Balladeer) LIKE I SAID, IT AIN'T GONNA BE EASY. UH, YOU GOT THIS ALL WRONG....

MARIJUANA! YOU KNOW, I NEVER MORE THAN DISLIKED THEM DUKE BOYS. BUT WHAT THEY'RE DOIN' NOW? PUSHIN' MARIJUANA, WELL, THAT'S DOWNRIGHT HATEFUL! HATEFUL! UNLESS MAYBE IT...

Figure the least we can do is draw Rosco off that fellow's tail. Never thought I'd live to see Rosco turn down a chance to catch us. It's too . Because he never would have...

I'M COMIN'. I AM COMIN'! MMM. (Cletus) OK, HERE WE GO, BOYS. DIG IN. PUT SOME GROCERIES DOWN YOUR NECK. CLETUS, YOU'RE QUITE A MAGICIAN, BUT I DON'T SEE HOW YOU...