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SCENE 1: BEN SITS IN THE LIVING ROOM WATCHING TV.
HIS MOTHER IS PACKING TO GO SOME- WHERE. THE TV SHOW IS GOING ON.
>>I’ll show you Pikachu.
>>Pika-pika-chuuuuuu!
>>Will Pikachu defeat Squirtle and his dangerous attempt to save the world?
Find out next week on WB 11.
Coming up, more crappy animation with “Digimon” right after these messages on WB 11!
And after “Digimon” we have a very special guest this morning. His name is Ryuki.
Hey you people out in this crazy world of ours.
Do you want to go back in time or see yourself in the future?
>>Yes, I do. I’d love to go to the future. Stupid present. I hate the present.
>>Well, for 100 measly bucks you can get a time machine! Call 1-800-TIME MACHINE.
>>1-800-846-322-4463.
MOM TURNS THE TV OFF.
>>Com’on, it’s time to go. We don’t want to be late. Let’s get a move on.
>>Mom, why do I have to go to the Amish country and stay with Uncle Zachariah?
>>Honey, I told you already. I have to go with your father on a trip.
You know it means a lot to him. He’s been looking forward to this all year.
As his wife, I have to go with him.
>>Why do you have to go?
Dad can bungee jump by himself.
>>Ben, do you remember last time, he forgot the cord?
Which unfortunately he realized after he jumped.
>>Yeah, that was quite a mess. Mom, this bungee jumping thing is driving me nuts!
He keeps jumping off the roof – I can’t sleep because of all the thuds and moaning.
>>Ah, but he shortened the cord.
>>All my friends make fun of me. He jumps out of trees as I pass.
Why can’t I go to Daniel’s house? He doesn’t mock me - he has vertigo.
>>Because you can’t invite yourself over to your friend’s house at the last minute.
Haven’t I taught you any manners throughout your life?
Our family is in a crisis. I hate my life!
Do you know on our first date, we parachuted out of an airplane?
On our honeymoon we went over Niagara Falls - in a barrel!
Do you know what it’s like giving birth while bungee jumping?!
There I was hanging from the bungee cord, while you were hanging from the umbilical cord.
So, I don’t need your backtalk. >>But…
>>No buts young man. Now, you wait in the house for Uncle Zachariah to come.
The cab for your father and me is waiting downstairs.
>>Well then I’m gonna bring all my stuff.
I’m gonna bring my Gameboy, my PSP, my DS, my SP, my Gameboy Advance…
>>You are not going to bring all that junk. You can pick one.
And don’t bring your valuable… whatever you call those games.
>>Mom, they’re called Gameboys, PSP, DS, SP…
>>Okay. Just bring one of them. Don’t bring a valuable one
because if you lose it, you’re not getting another.
We don’t have money because your father goes bungee jumping
and we have to pay for cords, helmets, travel, hospital bills, lawyers...
>>But, I love my Gameboys, my PSP, my DS, my SP!
They speak to me in a way that no others do! They give me dreams –
while you make my life a living hell.
>>I’m sorry, but, I’m only going to let you bring one.
>>Fine! Then I’ll bring my Gameboy.
I wish I could go to the future and bring back a robot-mom that would obey my every whim.
>>Well, I have to go to the cab. Now you be a good boy with Uncle Zachariah.
Amish people are a…bit different from us. Bye-bye.
I wish I could go to the future and bring back a robot son that would obey my every whim.