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See, this is why I’m glad we don’t f*ck around with point scores here. Because what
would I do about this? I mean, how do you have a Garfield game without the walking egg?
Like, what’s the protocol for that one…Internet? How many decimal points do you knock off for
that?
7.9, I guess. Everything’s a 7.9 on the Internet.
It’s Garfield: Caught In The Act, for the SEGA Genesis.
I mean, I guess we could split it up, right? Like, a…f*cking cadaver. Alright, hey, the
concept’s pretty good. Looks like a solid 8.1 to me. You play as Garfield, you get sucked
into the TV…you have to platform through common settings for movies and TV shows. So,
you know, there’s a horror level in a cemetery…there’s a prehistoric level, with sweltering jungles…
Actually, there’s a really cool film noir stage, too. Everything’s black and white,
Garfield’s wearing that hat, that all the detectives wear…old people are throwing
crap at you…
I don’t remember that from The Maltese Falcon.
So it’s a cool concept. Actually, it reminds me of Mickey Mania, in a way…putting the
main character in different settings for every level. It’d be cooler if those settings
were actually from the character’s material, like Mickey Mania…but nonetheless, it works.
8.4! That’s almost an 8.5, for those keeping track at home. Which…I mean, that’s a
pretty good number.
And numbers for the presentation, too! This thing wasn’t released until 1995, which
it’s got the visual polish that defined a lot of late 16-bit games. The music’s
okay…and the backgrounds, in particular. Not only do they look good, but they also
have a really effective use of color.
Never overbearing, or obnoxious…always subtle.
And that highlights the gameplay, instead of distracting from it.
8.9, is what I’m saying.
Speaking of the gameplay, though…boy, that’s where Garfield’s lasagna gets cold. ‘Cause
this game kind of plays like crap. Actually, it’s not fair to say that, ‘cause that
seems to imply that the controls are the problem. They’re not. I mean, they’re not great…sometimes,
they were a little unresponsive, especially your attack. But all in all, it’s okay.
Garfield plays okay.
No, the real problem…is the level design. When it’s at its best, its passible. At
its worst, it’s annoying. And usually, it’s annoying. The enemies are cheap, the layouts
are unclear…it’s a shame, too. Because it’s a solid idea, and it does a great job
with the presentation…
But it just doesn’t play well.
So actually, the game’s other problem might be a good thing. ‘Cause at least it’s
short. Like, really short. There’s only five levels, and even the levels themselves
are short. Which I like, in most cases. Short levels, making progress, different scenery,
that’s what you want. But if you only have a couple levels…I mean, you’re kind of
missing the point, right?
And I know the game has a reputation for being easy, but…I don’t know, I died a lot.
Maybe it’s because I was annoyed by the levels, maybe it’s because the attacks don’t
always work and the enemies kept cheaping me to death…I don’t know, I have no idea.
After a while, I turned it off and just started watching Garfield and Friends.
I like that walking egg.
I like bad platformers less, though. This is kind of a bad platformer. Actually, that’s
not even true…it’s not a “bad” platformer. It’s just an okay platformer. Which honestly,
I think that’s even worse. At least a bad platformer has no chance. This one actually
does a lot of good things, before it hits you with its annoying level design. And occasional
clunkiness.
It builds you up, only to let you down.
And mess you around.
And worst of all…alright, that’s enough. It’s Garfield: Caught In The Act, for the
SEGA Genesis. If you go into this expecting dancing, fiesta, romancing, siesta, samba,
La Bamba…
Well, don’t bother. All you get is the aye carumba.
Thanks to Kris from Jersey City, New Jersey, for sending this to the show.
7.9.