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The Forsaken Old People
Family… Everyone is familiar with this word, but it is perceived differently. For some
people family is a birth of a child, for others it is a happy marriage. Some people would
remember their kind parents, their beautiful childhood… This word gives you positive
feelings. But have you thought that there are people who perceive the word “family”
as something painful, hurting? It reminds them about betrayal and loneliness. There
are people who have never found true and pure family happiness.
It is not a secret that old people are one of the most vulnerable groups of population
in Kyrgyzstan, and even in all post-soviet countries. After collapse of USSR, transition
to independency was a difficult period of time. It led to different economic problems.
Kyrgyzstanians, who worked their whole life for the good of the country, faced with such
issue as low pensions. The only hope for existence was their children. But unfortunately, many
of young boys and girls migrated to different countries searching for job opportunities.
In various regions of the country, it becomes common to see how old people were deceived
by swindlers. Unsuspecting lonely old ladies and gentlemen can easily lose their property.
Nina Aleekseevna has lived in a hospice for many years. Long time ago she had changed
her apartment but she found herself to be the victim of the fraud. In the end, she was
left homeless.
Interview Nina Alekseevna: “I sold my apartment and wanted to purchase
two-room apartment. There was one girl who worked in social assistance, I gave her money
to buy a two room flat. She bought and I lived there for one year. But one day the owner
of the flat came and said that I didn’t pay the full sum. This girl didn’t give
him all the money. So, I was kicked out. I heard about hospice for old people. I came
here and stayed here…”
Nina Alekseevna grew up in children orphanage. She doesn’t have close relatives who would
help her. She has suffered a lot of things in her life and who could think that in her
ages she will find happiness in the hospice. Now she spends her golden ages here and rejoices
in every day of her life.
Live. “Every day we work out like that…”
We are in the Bishkek hospice center for disabled and old people. There are more than 200 aged
people. Each one of them can share their own personal story and it will not remain you
indifferent.
Interview Munira Mamatsyrova, senior nurse
is one of the activists in the hospice. She has lived here for 5 years but since the first
day of her stay she couldn’t keep still. She started working in the local library.
Interview Gulipa Alieva.
Today Gulipa is 75 years old. She met a lot of people here and she can tell different
stories of hard lives of the old. Gulipa thanks the administration of the hospice and various
sponsors and volunteers who visit them and try to make their lives more colorful. Older
generation needs care and love, for they have experienced a lot of pains and rejection from
the closest people. One of such people is Taajigul. She lived with her young son, his
wife, and their children. After her son had left for Russia to work, the family conflicts
started.
Interview Taakigul Ukueva “When my son had left, I stayed with his
wife and their children. The daughter-in-law started drinking alcohol, she came home late.
I tried to help her, I was cleaning the house, cooked, looked after the grandchildren. But
one day she came home drunk. I couldn’t keep silent and said that it was not good.
I guess, she didn’t like that. She beat me up and kicked me out in the middle of the
night.”
Local government workers helped Taajigul settle in hospice. It was difficult for her to get
used to, but there was no other way. Other children of Taajigul live in different cities,
but she doesn’t take offence at them, except her youngest son.
Interview Taakigul Ukueva “I heard that my son has returned from Russia.
But he didn’t visit me. I think he feels shame for himself and his wife. But I think
that he should have examined that who was right and who was wrong. I guess I will never
forgive my youngest son. And even if he comes here to take me back home, I will not go with
him. I got used to that place, I have friends. I like it.”
Taajigul found a hobby here. She likes sewing. It helps her to forget the pain. She enjoys
sewing and she gives her handicraft to friends and neighbors.
Live. Taajigul sews.
Taajigul is not the only person who found hobby. Esenbek Abdurasulov is 73 years old,
even though he looks much younger. He has a rich experience, he visited many countries,
speaks several languages. As a true master of the house, he is interested in upclassing
the territory. For 30 years nobody looked after the territory around the hospice. It
was full of bushes. But today no one does remember that once there was a wilderness
here.
Interview Esenbek Abdyrasulov. “Here we have tomatoes, potatoes. We also
have raspberry plantations. When we have fruits, first of all, we distribute them among our
old people who are not able to move. It is a rule for us!”
Today everybody praises the work of the old man. He became a good example for many people.
He proved that life is not over when you come to the hospice. It depends on a person what
kind of time he or she will spend here. It can be a suffering for some, but for others
this place can be turned to a beautiful and wonderful pastime.
Interview Esenbek Abdyrasulov. “Everybody has his own destiny. I have youngest
daughter, but we don’t communicate with her. It happens so sometimes… But I think
the hospice is not the death sentence. If you are here, it doesn’t mean that you cannot
do anything. You can live here and develop yourself. If a person likes working, he will
find a work anywhere. I think the old people should show an example, no matter what trials
we have in your life, no matter how difficult these trials are.”
From psychological perspective such kind of behavior of old people can have a positive
impact on different things. When a person switches his attention from negative memory
and direct his energy to creative activity, it will help distract from the pain and feeling
of rejection.
Everybody got used to think that old people
are helpless people who are not useful for society. But the following example refutes
this stereotype. This is Valentina Andreevna, she is 82 years old. Since 1995 she has been
a member of the self-help group. Every week 10 old women gather together and discuss the
working plans, their objectives and other working issues.
Interview Valentina Ivakhnova.
All made production is given to the shop “Babushka Incorporated” where anyone may buy good
clothes for low prices. Valentina lives with her disabled son. She doesn’t complain about
her life, but she
always finds something positive. The group where she is
in gives her strength and hope.
While we are young, we don’t think and suppose what we will
be in old ages. The stories of our characters show us that any person can find himself in
such situations. Honoring the eldest, especially parents, tends to be unpopular. Moral standards
have changed. Nevertheless, we would like to hope that honor and respect of old people
will be
in fashion among others, especially those who are the closest and
should
be grateful for their lives to the old people.