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FOR LONG ROMANTIC WEEKENDS, JUST THE TWO OF THEM.
AND THEY'D LEAVE MY SISTER AND I
UNDER THE SUPERVISION OF OUR UNCLE RUDY.
AS FAR AS WE KNEW, RUDY DIDN'T HAVE A HOME
OTHER THAN THIS CONVERSION VAN HE RODE AROUND IN.
HE'D PARK AND POP THE TOP ON SOME SUDS
AND HE'D CRANK UP THIS LITTLE HIBACHI,
AND HE'D GET IT REALLY, REALLY GOING,
AND HE WOULD JUST INCINERATE WHATEVER CHUNKS OF CHEAP CHUCK HE COULD FIND,
YOU KNOW, DOWN AT THE CASH-N-CARRY.
OH, HE HAD THESE SKEWERS THAT HE SAID OUR GREAT GRANDFATHER
TOOK OFF OF SOME TURK DURING THE GREAT WAR.
RUDY THOUGHT THOSE KABOBS WERE THE HEIGHT OF CUISINE.
AND THE BEER TOO.
I PROBABLY DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT
THOSE KABOBS TASTED HIDEOUS.
OR THAT MY SISTER AND I ADORED THEM.
YOU KNOW, THE ENTIRE KABOB THING SEEMED SO FOREIGN, SO EXOTIC,
AND SOMETIMES RUDY LET US SWORD FIGHT WITH THE SKEWERS WHEN WE WERE DONE EATING.
WHICH EXPLAINS WHY MY MOTHER NEVER LIKED THAT MAN.
ANYWAY, LIKE MANY AMERICAN SKEWER-MEISTERS,
UNCLE RUDY'S KABOBS SERVED AS A BOLD EXPRESSION OF HIS DESIRE
TO HAVE AS LITTLE TO DO WITH COOKING AS POSSIBLE.
WHICH IS A SHAME BECAUSE WITH A LITTLE TIME, ATTENTION, KNOW-HOW,
AND THE RIGHT SKEWERS,
KABOBS CAN BE A TRUE EXPRESSION OF...
♪♪
♪♪
DATELINE -- TURKEY 900 AD.
AS THE MOON RISES OVER THE BARREN, DESOLATE PLAINS OF EURASIA,
BANDS OF MARAUDING OTTOMANS,
TIRED AND HUNGRY FROM A LONG DAY OF EMPIRE BUILDING,
SETTLE DOWN TO THEIR SUPPER.
LIKE MY UNCLE RUDY THESE GUYS TRAVEL LIGHT
AND RARELY EAT AT A TABLE, AND MUCH LESS WITH A FORK.
AND OF COURSE, THEY DON'T SEEM TO HAVE ANYTHING TO SIT ON EVEN.
BUT THEY ARE A CIVILIZED AND INVENTIVE LOT.
SO WHEN ONE OF THEM MANAGES TO KILL A CRITTER OR TWO
THEY ADAPT AND THEY USE THEIR SWORDS AND DAGGERS AS CULINARY TOOLS.
AND THUS, THE SHISH KABOB,
OR SKEWERED, ROASTED MEAT PRODUCT, IS BORN.
OF COURSE, YOU HAVE TO WONDER,
IF THE OTTOMANS WERE SO INVENTIVE
WHY DIDN'T THEY INVENT THE OTTOMAN?
NOW LET'S SAY THAT COME SUPPER TIME
YOU FOUND YOURSELF FACING ONE SIMPLE TOOL,
A WEE LITTLE BIT OF TIME,
NOT MUCH WAY IN THE WAY OF FUEL,
AND ONE BIG OLD HONKIN' PIECE OF MEAT.
SAY A YAK RUMP OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
THE AMOUNT OF TIME AND TEMPERATURE,
AND THEREFORE FUEL REQUIRED TO COOK A PIECE OF MEAT,
IS GREATLY A FUNCTION OF SURFACE AREA.
NOW THIS PIECE OF MEAT HAS AN APPROXIMATE SURFACE AREA OF...
♪♪
ABOUT 864 SQUARE-INCHES OF SURFACE AREA,
GIVE OR TAKE A COUPLE OF INCHES.
BUT IF WE WERE TO CUT THIS INTO 2-INCH CUBES...
NOW IF I HAVE COUNTED CORRECTLY WE KNOW HAVE 216 2-INCH CUBES.
POSSESSING A TOTAL OF...
IF I CAN USE THIS THING...
UM, 5,175 SQUARE-INCHES OF SURFACE AREA,
GIVE OR TAKE.
ALL OTHER THINGS BEING EQUAL, THIS MEAT WOULD NOW COOK
ALMOST SIX TIMES FASTER THAN BEFORE,
AND OBVIOUSLY WITH A LOT LESS FUEL.
SO CLEARLY KABOBERY IS A VERY TIME AND FUEL EFFICIENT WAY OF COOKING.
NOW WHAT DOES THIS MEAN TO AMERICANS LIKE YOU AND ME
WHO PROBABLY HAVE PLENTY OF FUEL AND FOOD ON HAND?
FOR ONE THING, PROPERLY PREPARED KABOBS DELIVER UNPARALLELED FLAVOR
AT A VERY LOW PRICE.
AND SINCE WE'RE EVEN MORE PRESSED FOR TIME THAN MEDIEVAL MARAUDERS,
SKEWER-BASED COOKERY MAKES A LOT OF SENSE.
OF COURSE, WE DO HAVE TO HAVE THE RIGHT MEAT FOR THE JOB.
AND ALTHOUGH YAK RUMP WILL WORK,
I THINK THERE ARE PROBABLY BETTER OPTIONS AT THE MEGA-MART.
ALTHOUGH MANY CUTS FROM THE ROUND TO THE CHUCK
HAVE KABOB POTENTIAL,
I BELIEVE THAT THE SIRLOIN BEST DELIVERS THAT PERFECT BALANCE
OF BEEFY FLAVOR AND MEATY TEXTURE THAT
YOU WOULD EXPECT FROM SOMETHING AS PRIMAL AS A KABOB.
NOW SIRLOIN IS VERY EASY TO FABRICATE
IN THE HOME KITCHEN ENVIRONMENT,
AND AT UNDER $8 A POUND IT IS A BARGAIN.
YOU KNOW, I THINK I'LL HAVE THAT SECOND ONE FROM THE BOTTOM.
YEAH, THAT'S THE ONE.
BY THE WAY, IF YOU'VE EVER HEARD THAT STORY
ABOUT KING HENRY VIII HAVING KNIGHTED THIS PIECE OF MEAT, THUS MAKING IT SIR-LOIN.
THAT'S CRAZY TALK.
THE SIR COMES FROM THE FRENCH WORD FOR "UNDER,"
SO SIRLOIN ACTUALLY MEANS "UNDER THE LOIN."
THERE.
NOW TRADITIONALLY, KABOBS AND THEIR KIN
RECEIVE AT LEAST A BRIEF SOAK IN A MARINADE.
WHY?
WELL, REMEMBER OUR TURKISH MARAUDERS?
WHEN THEY MANAGED TO LAND A MEATY MORSEL
IT USUALLY WASN'T PRIME BEEF.
IT WAS A BOAR OR A BEAR, OR SOME OTHER STRANGE CRITTER
THAT WAS PROBABLY GAMY, AND DRY, AND TOUGH.
TO COUNTERACT THESE CONDITIONS THE RAIDERS WOULD SOAK THEIR DINNER
IN A RICHLY-SPICED GOO PRIOR TO COOKING.
WANT TO INFUSE YOUR KABOBERY WITH AUTHENTIC OTTOMAN FLAVOR?
FINE, JUST HOOK UP YOUR FAITHFUL FOOD PROCESSOR
AND ADD THREE CLOVES OF GARLIC...
TWO TEASPOONS OF PAPRIKA, SMOKED IF YOU CAN GET IT.
ADD 1/2 TEASPOON OF GROUND TURMERIC...
ONE TEASPOON OF GROUND CUMIN, TOASTED WOULD BE NICE.
ONE TEASPOON OF KOSHER SALT,
AND 1/2 TEASPOON OF FRESHLY GROUND BLACK PEPPER.
THEN 1/3 CUP OF RED WINE VINEGAR.
THEN SLAP ON THE LID, TURN ON,
AND DRIZZLE IN 1/2 CUP OF OLIVE OIL.
THE OIL WILL HELP TO MOVE FAT-SOLUBLE FLAVORS INTO THE MEAT
AS WELL AS LUBRICATE ANY CONNECTIVE TISSUE THAT IT CAN GET TO.
THE ACID IN THE VINEGAR WILL BRING FLAVOR AND MOISTURE TO THE PARTY,
AS WELL AS BREAK DOWN A LITTLE BIT OF CONNECTIVE TISSUE.
BUT DESPITE POPULAR MYTHOLOGY,
THE ACID WILL NOT PENETRATE THE MEAT DEEPLY ENOUGH TO TENDERIZE IT.
THERE, NOW...
TOSS THE MARINADE AND KABOB MEAT IN A HEAVY ZIP-TOP BAG
WITH AS MUCH AIR SQUEEZED OUT AS POSSIBLE.
THAT WILL MAXIMIZE MEAT-MARINADE CONTACT.
TOSS THIS INTO SOMETHING THAT WILL PREVENT ANY CONTAMINATION
SHOULD LEAKAGE OCCUR,
AND STASH IN THE REFRIGERATOR FOR LET'S SAY, TWO TO FOUR HOURS.
THAT SHOULD GIVE US JUST ENOUGH TIME
TO DO A LITTLE HARDWARE SEARCHING.
♪♪
♪♪
HI, W, YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY...
A.B., I REALLY DON'T HAVE TIME TO PLAY,
JUST REMEMBER, YOU BREAK IT, YOU BOUGHT IT.
HUH, WELL I GET THE POINT.
AND SO SOON SHALL SHE.
ONCE UPON A TIME, CHOOSING A SKEWER WAS AS SIMPLE
AS DRAWING ONE'S DAGGER OR FIXING ONE'S BAYONET.
TODAY, THERE ARE DOZENS, IF NOT HUNDREDS OF DIFFERENT DESIGNS.
MOST OF THEM REALLY BAD.
FOR INSTANCE, TAKE THIS CURVED MODEL
WHICH IS MEANT TO SIT ON THE EDGE OF ONE'S PLATE.
HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO... OH, I DON'T KNOW.
OTHER STANDOUTS, WE'VE GOT BASKETS, WE'VE GOT RACKS.
THIS IS LIKE DANTE'S KABOB PITCHFORK OF DEATH OR SOMETHING.
AND OH, CHECK THIS OUT.
HERE'S A RACK FOR THE ESPECIALLY LAZY.
YOU PUT ALL THE KABOBS ON THERE
AND TURN ONE HANDLE AND THEY ROTATE OVER THE FIRE.
I DON'T KNOW, I SAY THAT WE AVOID ALL SUCH MECHANICAL WHIMSY
AND JUST GET A STRAIGHTFORWARD SKEWER.
BUT EVEN THERE THINGS ARE A LITTLE BIT TRICKY
BECAUSE WE'VE GOT A LOT OF THINGS TO CONSIDER.
IS IT SHARP ENOUGH, IS IT DURABLE ENOUGH,
AND IS IT NOT GONNA RUST THROUGH YEARS OF USE?
THE ONLY THING I CAN THINK TO DO IS TO TEST THEM ALL.
(imitating W's voice) REMEMBER, A.B., IF YOU BREAK IT, YOU BOUGHT IT.
THE FIRST THING WE HAVE TO DO IS CHECK FOR TIP SHARPNESS.
OW!
WHAT?
WOW, THAT TOOK WAY TOO MUCH FORCE.
LET'S TRY ANOTHER, MAYBE SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE SLENDER.
WELL, IF IT WASN'T YOU, THEN WHO WAS IT?
SO LITTLE MISSY WANTS TO PLAY MISSILE COMMAND, DOES SHE?
UH-OH.
NOW THAT'S SHARP, BUT YOU'LL NOTICE
THAT METAL STOCK IS REALLY KIND OF ROUNDED.
THAT MEANS THAT FOOD COULD SLIP AROUND IT TOO EASILY.
AND THIS LITTLE GRIP ON THE END IS WAY TOO SMALL TO GET HOLD OF
WITH EITHER TONGS OR OVEN MITTS.
HEY, LET'S TRY A NON-STICK VERSION
AND SEE IF IT PENETRATES THIN PIECES OF MEAT ANY EASIER.
OW, OW!
WOW, THAT'S NOT THE KIND OF THING YOU WANNA SEE HAPPEN.
WELL, I GUESS THERE'S NOTHING LEFT TO DO BUT TEST THEM ALL.
♪♪
WELL, AFTER EXHAUSTIVE TESTING I DO BELIEVE WE HAVE...
A WINNER.
CHECK IT OUT, IT'S ABOUT 13 INCHES OF SKEWER,
IT'S HEAVY-DUTY NICKEL-PLATED STEEL.
YOU'LL NOTICE THAT IT IS RECTANGULAR IN CROSS-SECTION
THAT'LL KEEP FOOD FROM FLOPPING AROUND.
IT'S GOT A NICE SHARP POINT THAT CAN EASILY BE FILED TO KEEP IT THAT WAY.
AND ON THIS END A NICE BIG LOOP FOR EASY HANDLING AND STORAGE.
YEP, EVERYBODY THAT LOVES IT RAISE YOU HAND AND SAY, "YAY!"
OW, NOW IT'S MY HAND!
IT'S IN MY HAND NOW, LOOK!
JUST TRY TO RELAX, MS. WONG, WE'LL HAVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL IN NO TIME.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, BE GOOD.
♪♪
ALTHOUGH KABOBERY BE A SIMPLE SPORT
I DO FIND THAT BY FOLLOWING A FEW BASIC GUIDELINES
YOU CAN BOLSTER YOUR CHANCES OF SUCCESS.
YOU'LL NOTICE THAT I LIKE TO WORK WITH LATEX GLOVES.
THAT'S JUST BECAUSE THIS CAN GET A LITTLE BIT MESSY
AND THE MARINADE WILL STAIN IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL.
I'LL JUST HAVE TO DO LESS HAND WASHING THIS WAY.
NOTE THAT EVEN THOUGH ALL THE INGREDIENTS ARE GOING TO BE COOKED THROUGH
I DO KEEP THE MEAT SEGREGATED AWAY FROM THE VEGETABLES.
JUST TO PREVENT ANY POSSIBILITY OF CROSS-CONTAMINATION.
YOU'LL ALSO NOTICE THAT I ARRANGE THE MEAT
BEFORE I ACTUALLY DO ANY SKEWERING.
THIS WAY I CAN KINDA SORT OUT SIZES AND NUMBERS.
I KNOW THAT ALL THESE LITTLE PIECES
OBVIOUSLY ARE GOING TO GO ONTO A KABOB THAT WILL COOK FASTER
AND THESE LARGER PIECES HERE WILL COOK A LITTLE SLOWER.
I'VE GOT GOOD ORGANIZATION HERE
AND I KNOW THAT I NEED FOUR SKEWERS.
NOW WHEN IT COMES TO THE ACTUAL SKEWERING
YOU ALWAYS WANNA AIM FOR CENTER MASS.
NOW WE FACE THE NUMBER ONE KABOBING DILEMMA.
DO WE LEAVE THE MEAT PACKED IN TOGETHER
OR DO WE SPACE IT?
ALL PACKED TOGETHER LIKE THIS WE'VE GOT STABILITY.
THE MEAT IS A LOT LESS LIKELY TO SPIN AS WE TURN THE KABOB,
BUT WE DON'T HAVE MUCH IN THE WAY OF SURFACE AREA.
BY SPREADING OUT THE MEAT,
JUST PUTTING A BARE 1/2 INCH IN BETWEEN EACH PIECE,
WE INCREASE THE SURFACE AREA BY A FACTOR OF, I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE...
WOW, ALMOST 1 1/2 TIMES!
WHICH MEANS THAT THESE PIECES ARE GOING TO COOK FASTER.
AND OF COURSE THERE'S GOING TO BE MORE CHAR AND CHAR EQUALS FLAVOR.
YOU CAN SEE WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS.
BESIDES, ONE OF THE REASONS I THINK WE CAN GO WITH SPACING HERE IS THAT
BY USING SIRLOIN AND SKEWERING IT ACROSS THE GRAIN,
WE'RE GONNA HAVE A LITTLE MORE STABILITY THAN WE WOULD WITH OTHER CUTS.
THERE WE GO.
NOW IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO COOK THOSE RIGHT AWAY,
DEFINITELY PUT THEM INTO THE REFRIGERATOR.
IN THE MEANTIME, WE WILL CONSIDER VEGETABLES.
WHEN RUNNING THROUGH VEGETABLES THERE ARE STILL SOME GUIDELINES,
BEGINNING WITH THE SKEWERS IN QUESTION.
IF YOU HAVE SOME SKEWERS WITH RELATIVELY FLAT BLADES
YOU WANNA USE THEM FOR VEGETABLES
BECAUSE THEY'RE A LOT LESS LIKELY TO SPLIT THINGS.
AND THERE ARE SOME OTHER CHALLENGES.
I MEAN LOOK, THE VEGETABLES HAVE GOT A LOT OF DIFFERENT TEXTURES,
DIFFERENT HARDNESSES, AND DIFFERENT SHAPES.
THINGS WITH SQUISHY CENTERS, LIKE ZUCCHINI,
SHOULD ALWAYS BE CUT IN AT LEAST 1-INCH ROUNDS.
THEN YOU SHOULD SKEWER THROUGH THE SIDE.
NOW WHEN SKEWERING DON'T HOLD LIKE THIS, OKAY?
I'VE SEEN SOME HORRIBLE THINGS HAPPEN.
SO LAY IT DOWN LIKE THIS, FLAT ON A CLEAN COUNTER OR WORK SURFACE.
PUT YOUR HAND ON TOP AND RUN THROUGH THUSLY.
NICE AND SAFE AND EVEN.
NOW MOVING ON, WE'VE GOT MUSHROOMS.
NOW MUSHROOMS ARE NOTORIOUS SKEWER SPINNERS.
SO ALWAYS LEAVE THE STEM ON AND ALWAYS RUN THROUGH THE STEM.
FROM THE BOTTOM FORWARD, LIKE THAT, OKAY?
ONIONS, ONIONS ARE VERY POPULAR ON KABOBS,
BUT CUTTING THEM INTO WEDGES AND THEN TRYING TO PUT THEM ON,
THEY ALWAYS FALL APART.
SO I SUGGEST GOING WITH EITHER BIG HUNKS OF LEEKS OR LARGE PEARL ONIONS.
LEAVE THEM INTACT, JUST TRIM OFF A LITTLE BIT FROM BOTH ENDS.
THEN WHEN YOU RUN THOSE THROUGH GO THROUGH THE ROOT END.
IF YOU FIND THAT THERE'S TOO MUCH RESISTANCE WITH SOMETHING LIKE AN ONION,
HOLD THE FOOD WITH A ROLLED UP KITCHEN TOWEL
SO THAT IF THE SKEWER SLIPS IT DOESN'T SLIP TOO FAR IF YOU GET MY DRIFT.
THERE YOU GO.
WE'VE ALSO GOT PEPPERS, VERY, VERY POPULAR.
I LIKE WORKING IN LITTLE ROUNDS LIKE THIS.
BECAUSE WHEN YOU RUN THOSE GUYS THROUGH THEY STAY NICE AND EVEN,
AND YOU GET SOME CHARRING AROUND THE SIDE.
BUT IF YOU PREFER, YOU CAN ALWAYS CUT YOUR PEPPERS INTO STRIPS
AND KIND OF LACE THEM ON.
UNFORTUNATELY YOU DO HAVE TO DO THIS UP IN THE AIR.
SOMETIMES THEY BREAK, SOMETIMES THEY DON'T.
THAT WAY YOU GET MORE CHAR ON THE SIDES.
LAST BUT NOT LEAST, DO NOT LEAVE OUT THE HARD VEGETATION.
THINGS LIKE SWEET POTATOES AND RUTABAGAS ARE GREAT KABOB FODDER.
JUST BE SURE THAT YOU SOAK THEM IN WATER FOR AWHILE
BEFORE YOU TRY SKEWERING THEM.
IT'LL KEEP THEM FROM SPLITTING.
AND AGAIN, LAY THEM DOWN
AND USE THE TOWEL TO RUN THEM THROUGH.
♪♪
♪♪
AAH.
ALTHOUGH YOU CAN CERTAINLY SUCCESSFULLY COOK YOUR KABOBS
UNDER THE OVEN BROILER,
IT IS A TEDIOUS TASK AT BEST.
IF YOU'VE GOT A GRILL THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO WANT TO USE.
AND IF YOU'VE GOT A GAS GRILL, AND I HAPPEN TO KNOW THAT MOST OF US IN AMERICA DO,
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO OBSERVE A COUPLE OF EXTRA RULES.
ONE, YOUR GRATES ARE GOING TO HAVE TO BE VERY, VERY CLEAN WHEN YOU START.
YOU'RE GONNA WANNA MAKE SURE THAT YOUR HEAT IS SET TO MEDIUM-HIGH,
AT LEAST IN THE BEGINNING SO YOU GET A GOOD SEAR.
YOU'RE GONNA WANT TO FLIP YOUR KABOBS EVERY COUPLE OF MINUTES
UNTIL THEY ARE COOKED THROUGH.
AND TYPICALLY I FIND IT'S ABOUT EIGHT MINUTES FOR RARE,
AND ABOUT 12 MINUTES FOR MEDIUM.
ONCE THEY ARE DONE, AND THESE LOOK LIKE THEY ARE,
I'M GONNA MOVE THOSE OFF TO ALUMINUM FOIL
AND JUST WRAP THEM UP SO THAT THEY CAN REST
FOR AT LEAST A COUPLE OF MINUTES
BEFORE WE TAKE THEM OFF AND SERVE.
NOW IF YOU ARE IN POSSESSION OF A CHARCOAL GRILL
OR A FIRE BOWL, OTHERWISE KNOWN AS A BRAZIER,
YOU ARE IN LUCK,
AND SO ARE YOUR KABOBS.
IF YOU WERE TO LOOK AT COOKING SCENES PORTRAYED IN PAINTINGS
FROM SAY 13th-CENTURY INDIA, 14th-CENTURY PERSIA OR TURKEY,
YOU'LL SEE THAT THE KABOBS ARE ALWAYS SUSPENDED OVER FIRE,
NOT PUT RIGHT DOWN ON GRILL GRATES.
THAT'S STRICTLY A WESTERN COOKING KIND OF THING.
SO IF YOU'VE GOT A CHARCOAL GRILL
WHAT YOU CAN DO IS REMOVE THE COOKING GRATE,
LINE SOME BRICKS AROUND WHERE THE CHARCOAL IS,
AND THEN JUST LAY THE KABOBS ACROSS THE BRICKS.
THAT WILL LET YOU GET THEM NICE AND CLOSE.
I LIKE TO BE ABOUT 2 INCHES OFF THE CHARCOAL.
WHAT THAT LETS YOU DO IS USE A VERY SMALL AMOUNT OF CHARCOAL
WHICH OF COURSE, IS IN KEEPING WITH
THE WHOLE ECONOMY OF THIS METHOD.
AND OF COURSE, IT CREATES A LOT OF FLAVOR.
BUT YOU ARE GONNA HAVE TO TURN THEM FREQUENTLY, WHICH IS A GOOD THING.
I USUALLY TURN THEM ABOUT EVERY MINUTE
UNTIL THEY ARE DONE TO MY LIKING,
AND I LIKE THEM MEDIUM WITH THIS KIND OF MEAT.
IF YOU'VE GOT SKEWERS WITH REALLY BIG LOOPS,
ODDS ARE GOOD YOU'LL BE ABLE TO USE YOUR FINGERS TO FLIP THESE OVER.
BUT YOU SHOULD STILL KEEP SOME OF THESE AROUND.
THIS IS PRETTY CLOSE TO AUTHENTIC KABOBERY.
BUT IF YOU WANT TO REALLY BE HISTORICALLY ACCURATE
AND YOU'VE GOT A LITTLE YARD TO SPARE,
JUST FIND YOURSELF A NICE LEVEL PLACE,
AND REMOVE ANY EXTRANEOUS, UNNECESSARY PLANT LIFE.
THAT CAN GROW SOMEWHERE ELSE.
CARVE YOURSELF A SHALLOW TRENCH,
SAY MAYBE 4 INCHES DEEP, 12 INCHES WIDE, AND ABOUT 5 FEET LONG.
LINE IT WITH SAND AND CIRCLE IT WITH STONES OR BRICKS,
AND THEN JUST FILL IT UP WITH HOT CHARCOAL.
ABOVE ALL, REMEMBER THAT KABOBS ARE PARTY FOOD.
IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT THE PARTY IS.
YOU COULD BE CELEBRATING YOUR NEW JOB,
OR I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE YOU'VE LAID SIEGE TO A FORTIFIED TOWN.
IT DOESN'T MATTER, THE MORE THE MERRIER.
GOING WITH THE TRENCH METHOD
EVERYONE CAN SUPERVISE THEIR OWN COOKING,
AND THAT TAKES THE RESPONSIBILITY AND PRESSURE OFF YOU, THE HOST.
NOW REMEMBER THAT IN KABOBERY
FREQUENT FOOD FIDDLING IS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY.
YOU'VE GOTTA KEEP TURNING THE FOOD ALL THE TIME.
AND KEEP TESTING FOR DONENESS.
NOW SINCE A THERMOMETER ISN'T REALLY PRACTICAL WITH THIS FORM OF COOKERY,
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO USE YOUR HANDS.
JUST GIVE THE MEAT A SQUEEZE.
IT SHOULD BE FIRM YET YIELDING,
CHARRED ON THE OUTSIDE, BUT CLEARLY JUICY ON THE INSIDE.
SINCE YOU CAN TEST A PIECE AT A TIME
BEEF KABOBS ARE ACTUALLY A REALLY GREAT TRAINING GROUND
FOR TEACHING YOURSELF MEAT DONENESS IN GENERAL.
AS FOR VEGETABLES,
KEEP EACH TO ITS OWN SKEWER FOR EVEN COOKING.
BRUSH WITH A LITTLE OIL,
SPRINKLE WITH SOME SALT AND PEPPER,
AND ALWAYS WORK IN ZONES.
THAT IS, FAST COOKING VEGGIES LIKE ZUCCHINI, MUSHROOMS, AND SMALL ONIONS,
GO OVER HOTTER COALS.
WHILE DENSE FOODS LIKE RUTABAGAS, SWEET POTATOES, THINGS LIKE THAT,
WILL GO OVER SLOWER FIRE.
SWEET POTATOES ARE REALLY VERY, VERY GOOD, BY THE WAY.
SO WHEN IT COMES TIME TO SERVE YOU'VE GOT LOTS OF OPTIONS...
AND THAT'S CERTAINLY ONE OF THEM.
BUT IF YOU'RE NOT EXPERIENCED YOU MIGHT PUT AN EYE OUT.
SO MIGHT I SUGGEST, FOR INSTANCE, COUSCOUS.
♪♪
THERE YOU GO, YOU GUYS EAT UP.
OF COURSE WHAT I LIKE TO DO IS JUST GRAB A PIECE OF HOT BUTTERED PITA
AND MAKE MYSELF AN ISTANBUL HOT DOG.
NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL GOOD EATS.
OF COURSE, THERE IS DESSERT TO BE CONSIDERED.
♪♪
♪♪
SAY THE WORDS "KABOB" AND "DESSERT,"
AND I THINK FRUIT.
JUST AS MEAT APPRECIATES A LITTLE BIT OF A SOAK IN A MARINADE
BEFORE FACING THE FIRE,
SO DOES FRUIT APPRECIATE A LITTLE SYRUP.
SPLIT ONE VANILLA BEAN AND SCRAPE OUT THE PULP,
PRESERVING BOTH THE POD AND THE PULP.
PLACE A SMALL SAUCE PAN OVER MEDIUM-HIGH HEAT,
DUMP IN ONE FIRMLY PACKED CUP OF BROWN SUGAR,
HALF A CUP OF FRESHLY SQUEEZED LIME JUICE,
A PINCH OF SALT, AND THE REMAINS OF THE BEAN.
WHISK THAT OVER THE HEAT UNTIL THE SUGAR HAS THOROUGHLY DISSOLVED.
THEN SET IT OFF TO THE SIDE FOR TWO HOURS
SO THE FLAVORS CAN MELD.
AND FINALLY REMOVE THE POD REMAINS.
AS SOON AS IT COOLS TRANSPORT YOUR SYRUP TO THE NEAREST SQUIRT BOTTLE.
THIS IS FOR EASY APPLICATION.
IN THE REFRIGERATOR THIS STUFF WILL KEEP FOR,
I DON'T KNOW, NEXT TO FOREVER,
BUT IT PROBABLY WON'T GET A CHANCE
BECAUSE IT IS SO GOSH DARN USEFUL.
I PUT THIS ON EVERYTHING FROM ANGEL FOOD CAKE TO PORK LOIN.
BUT WE ARE TALKING ABOUT KABOBS HERE
AND MY FAVORITE TARGET IS... THE PINEAPPLE.
THAT'S RIGHT, THE KABOBER'S BEST FRIEND.
LET'S CUT ONE UP, SHALL WE?
NOW I AM A VERY, VERY BIG FAN OF SERRATED KNIVES.
SERRATED BREAD KNIVES ARE THE BEST THING FOR THIS.
SO START BY TAKING THE TOP OFF THE PINEAPPLE,
THEN LOGICALLY, THE BOTTOM.
STAND IT UP ON END AND SPLIT INTO QUARTERS.
LAY DOWN THOSE QUARTERS AND CAREFULLY SPLIT THOSE INTO EIGHTHS.
THEN STAND UP EACH PIECE AND JUST SHAVE OFF THE CORE.
THEN LAY IT DOWN AND FILLET OFF THE SKIN.
WATCH YOUR FINGERS!
THE GOAL IN COOKING THIS KIND OF FRUIT IS
TO CREATE JUST A THIN OUTER LAYER OF SUGAR
THAT WILL CARAMELIZE AS THE PINEAPPLE UNDERNEATH SOFTENS.
COOKING IS GOING TO TAKE ABOUT FOUR MINUTES PER SIDE,
AND WE'VE GOT THREE SIDES SO ABOUT 12 MINUTES.
BE PATIENT, AND FEEL FREE TO REAPPLY SYRUP
ONCE OR TWICE DURING THE PROCESS.
THERE'LL BE A LITTLE SMOKE, BUT DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
HEY, EVERYBODY GOT YOUR ICE CREAM READY?
EXCELLENT, LOAD UP AND DIG IN!
♪♪
WELL, I HOPE YOUR APPETITE IS READY AND WILLING
TO EMBRACE SOME SKEWER-CENTRIC CUISINE.
NOT ONLY DO SHISH KABOBS LINK US TO A MORE COLORFUL, SIMPLER TIME,
THEY CAN HELP YOU MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR CURRENT TIME.
NOT TO MENTION YOUR FOOD BUDGET.
LIKE MY UNCLE RUDY USED TO SAY,
"IF YOU CAN'T DRIVE A STAKE THROUGH IT, IT AIN'T GOOD EATS."
SEE YA NEXT TIME.
Captioned by Scripps Networks, Inc.