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[indistinct chatter]
-I'm gonna ask Santa for a new bike.
-I'm asking for arm floaties.
Getting dunked in milk is terrifying
when you don't know how to swim.
-And I want a dog ornament to have as a pet
and a pony ornament to have as a pony
and also peace on earth
and also a new hook 'cause mine is gonna bend
and also an Xbox...
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[shatters] -Congrats, Ornament.
You just "shattered" the record for longest wish list. [laughs]
I mean, ho ho ho.
-All right. Our next lucky kid is-- whoa!
-Out of the way, elf.
-Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas, Coal.
What's on your wish list?
-For you to shut up. [grunts]
-Wuh-oh. Looks like Coal's getting himself for Christmas.
[laughs]
-Please be careful around the decorations!
We spent a lot of time on those!
-I don't care. I have a bad attitude,
and I don't care who knows it.
-Hey! Hey, Coal, hey! -What do you want?!
-Has anyone ever told you you're a real rock-head? [laughs]
I mean, ho ho ho.
-Flattery's not gonna get you anywhere, Santa Fraud.
I just drank like five Zoom Colas,
and now I just want to break stuff!
-Zoom is known to cause extreme behavior in children.
-(other cans) Extreeeme!
-Extreeeeme!
-Hey, you're not allowed back there!
-Mah! [crash!]
-Look, it's Rudolph the Black-Eyed Reindeer. [laughs]
-Coal, you need to simmer down!
-Yeah, this is some real "stocking" behavior, Coal.
[laughs] I don't get it.
-You don't want to be just another name
on Santa's naughty list, do you?
-I don't want to be just another name on the list;
I want to headline the naughty list. Meh!
-Seriously, where are your parents?
-We're right here. -Yeah, mehh.
-Whoa! The whole family's "carbon" copies of one another.
[laughs] Carbon.
-My wife and I just drank 20 Zoom sodas.
-We're trying an all-Zoom diet.
-Turns out it's not effective whatsoever.
Meh! -Mehh!
[objects breaking]
-[grumbles] Orange! We have to do something!
They're ruining Christmas!
-I have two ideas. -Awesome! What are they?
-One: we can try and touch our tongues to our eyeballs.
[grunts] -That doesn't solve anything!
-Second idea:
we can call Coal's parents' parents to take them home.
-Someone called? I'm Grandpa Coal.
I see my grandson and his parents
are terrorizing your Christmas display.
-Oh, thank goodness you're here.
Can you talk some sense into them?
-I can try.
Let me just take a swig of courage juice first.
-EXTREEEME!
-Seriously? Zoom is your courage juice?
-Extreeeme!
Mehh. -Orange, look out!
They're gonna tip over the tree! -What the huh?
-(coals) Meh... meh... meh...
-Timber! [laughs]
[ornaments shatter, tree thuds]
-Oh no! I think they got squished!
-Help! Help us! Meh!
-Come help Santa, Santa's Little Helper. [laughs]
-[grumbles] Okay, fine.
-[grunts]
-Man, I have the worst headache. What happened?
-Whoa! Orange, the coals got squished into diamonds!
-Whoa! -We did!
-Awesome! -Mehh!
-Nothing's harder than a diamond.
That means we're indestructible.
-Now we can drink all the Zoom we want
and do whatever we want.
-I mean, we did that already, but yeah.
-Nothing can squish a diamond. -Nothing on earth.
-Diamonds rule! -Mehh!
-Meh!! -Mehh!!
-(all) Mehh! [squash!]
-Eww. Not again.
-Ho ho ho! From all us here in the kitchen,
♪ We squish you a merry Christmas ♪
♪ We squish you a merry Christmas ♪
♪ We squish you a merry Christmas ♪
♪ And a tiny midget elf ♪ -Hey!
-[Orange laughs] Knife! [Captions by StreamCaptions.com]