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"GLAMOUR" AND JEAN CHATZKY.
THERE ARE TIPS WE CAN WALK AWAY
WITH AND MAKE US BETTER.
>> REAL HARD TIPS LIKE HARD
NEWS.
>> A THEME.
>> ARE WE TRYING TO GET A RAISE?
WHAT ARE WE DOING?
>> IT REALLY COULD BE ANYTHING.
YOU HAVE A GOAL, YOU WANT MORE
MONEY OR LIKE KATHIE SAID, YOU
WANT HIMO DO THINGS ON A
REGULAR BASIS.
>> YOU SAY FIND A LOCATION.
>> I THINK THERE'S THIS
MISCONCEPTION THAT ALL
NEGOTIATIONS HAVE TO TAKE PLACE
IN A BOARDROOM UNDER FLUORESCENT
LIGHTS.
IF YOU HAVE A CHANCE TO BE IN A
MORE SOCIAE SETTING, IT'S
FRIENDLIER.
>> YOU SHOULD BE EATING, BECAUSE
IT SORTS OF BRINGS DOWN YOUR
BOUNDARIES AND MAKES FOR A MORE
FREE-FLOWING CONVERSATION.
>> THERE ARE STUDIES THAT SHOW
THAT NEGOTIATIONS WORK BETTER IF
YOU'RE AT A MEAL.
MY TRICK IN MY OWN MARRIAGE IS
EVERY IMPORTANT CONVERSATION HAS
TO HAPPEN IN THE CAR ON A LONG
CAR TRIP, YOU KNOW, MORE THAN
HALF AN HOUR.
>> YOU HAVE NO PLACE TO GO.
>> THAT'S THE POINT.
THAT'S WHERE I TALK TO MY
TEENAGERS.
YOU HAVE AN AUDIENCE THAT'S NOT
GOING ANYWHERE.
>> I USED TO PUT MY KIDS IN THE
BATHTUB.
>> IN THE BATHTUB.
TRAPPED?
>> THAT WON'T WORK AT AN OFFICE.
>> AT THE END OF A NEGOTIATION,
EVERYONE WANTS TO FEEL LIKE THEY
GOT SOMETHING.
YOU BOTH HAVE TO WIN KIND OF IN
THAT GAME, DON'T YOU?
>> ABSOLUTELY.
IF YOU CAN PUT YOURSELF IN THE
OTHER PERSON'S SHOES AND FIGURE
OUT WHAT CONSTITUTES A WIN GOING
IN, YOU'RE AHEAD OF THE GAME.
>> GETTING WHAT THEY SAID WHILE
YOU GET WHAT YOU NEED.
>> WRITE THAT DOWN.
>> REALLY GOOD NEGOTIATORS, IF
THEY SEE THE OTHER PERSON IS NOT
FEELING GREAT ABOUT THE OUTCOME,
THEY'LL SAY WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?
HOW DO I MAKE THIS WORTH YOUR
WHILE?
IF BOTH ARE NOT HAPPY, IT WON'T
LAST.
>> BAFBLLY IN THE MARRIAGE WHAT
IF YOU'RE THE GIVER AND YOUR
PARTNER IS BASICALLY A TAKER,
THAT'S HIS NATURE AND THAT'S
WHAT HE'S USED TO.
>> SOMETIMES YOU NEED A THIRD
PARTY TO HELP YOU THROUGH THIS
NEGOTIATION.
IF THIS IS A CONSTANT PROBLEM,
YOU MAY BE BETTER OFF JUST --
>> IN COUNSELING.
>> YEAH.
>> HOW DO YOU GET THEM TO GO
THERE?
>> YOU LAY IT ON THE LINE.
IF IT'S A SITUATION THAT'S NOT
GOING WELL AND NOT GOING TO MOVE
FORWARD --
>> IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU LOSE
EVERY NEGOTIATION, HE GETS WHAT
HE WANTS.
>> BUT EVEN IF A WORK CONTEST,
IF YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE YOU'RE
LE TO HANDLE IT, THERE ARE
SITUATIONS WHERE YOU ABDICATE,
WALK OUT AND LET SOMEBODY ELSE
DO IT FOR YOU, BECAUSE YOU GET
TOO EMOTIONAL.
>> I THINK WHAT OMEN DO THAT
UNDERMIN THEM IS WE'RE VERY
UNCOMFORTABLE WITH SILENCE.
>> WE HAVE TO FILL IT, JUST LIKE
I DID.
>> SO GREATNEGOTIATORS USE THAT
TO YOUR VANTAGE.
>> LADIES, THANK YOU FOR ALL
YOUR INFORMATION.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
>>> WE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT
THE FUN PHOTOS YOU SENT