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Hey, what the hell's this thing in the corner of my vision?
It's like, 88, and a plus sign.
Maybe it's my ability to do math.
I always was good at arithmetic.
Oh! Oh, oh wait, i remember. I remember!
Sarge told me about this, it's my suit. My suit syncs up with my helmet, and shows me a unit of my life signs. Okay, cool.
Jeez, 12% gone already? I touch an electrified wire and I'm already 12 per cent dead!
Or 88% alive, depending on how you look at it. Now to-oh ***.
Oh, crabs, huh? I guess I can hit them with this thing, but I don't really want to touch them, so...yeah.
Uuuuh, you can't see me, you can't see me, you can''t see me, you can't see me, you can't see me, you can't see me, you can't see me, you can't see me, you can't see me, you can't see me!
Hell yeah. Went past those *** like a pro! That was pretty beast.
You guys are never gonna catch me-WAH! Son of a ***!
Yeah, what now, you little ***? Can't catch me over the slime...OH JESUS.
God-***-damn it.
Uh, hey. Hey. C'mon, open the door! I don't have any security access, I'm just a soldier.
Let me in. C'mon, oper the door! I know you can see me, I'm looking right at you!
C'mon. Don't be a prick. There's aliens out here!
Okay fine, I'll try this thing...okay, the retinal scanner doesn't work!
It doesn't work ,it won't let me in-Ow!
C'mon, you ***. I almost got glass in my face!
Okay, I guess they're experiencing some technical difficulties. I'll just find a way around, guys. Forget about it.
Man, I would not want to be the electrician in this place. Or the custodian.
In fact, employment here in general is just looking like a really bad idea.
Oh good. Finally, ground level. I was thinking it was gonna take longer to get to the surface.
That's a pretty big chasm. HELLO! (echoes)
Aw, what the hell? The walkway's broken? *** rockslides.
Hmmmm...actually, I think I can just jump this. I'm jumping it. *** it.
Woah-woah-uh-AAAAH! Oh, and he sticks the dismount!
Okay, I probably shouldn't look down. Don't look down, why are you looking down, stop looking down! Okay.
Okay, I guess I can just, sorta, climb around the edge. Pain in the ***, but I can do it.
And up and over. Ah! Jeez, this is so nuts!
Don't collapse.
God, what a bunch of ***. I bet the rest of the people in my platoon don't have to deal with this ***.
Oh. My. GOD. Is that a KNIFE?
Oho. Look at this thing. Oh man, it's got a killer edge.
This is -HOLY FREAKING CRAP! Is that an alien?
Oh...dammit. Look at this guy. He's got yellow blood and...
And six eyes...
...and weird bent knees and little hooves.
I've never seen an alien before up close. And low that I have, I feel richer for the experience.
Oh-okay, crab-battle! C'mon, let's go.
Hit the weak point for massive damage. Okay, some aliens do suck.
Maybe that other alien did suck too. I mean, he had a knife in his back.
He-hey! It's the crash site...uh, and, uh...
Jadar is dead, okay and...there's electricity everywhere. Um, so, fine...
Okay. Now to find another way.
Yeah, bring it. Let's do this. Huh!
Hi-yah!
So are you-Ow!
Ah well. 2 out of 3 ain't bad.
You know, maybe these aliens got shipped in from Area 51.
I mean, we can't be that far away from Roswell.
I guess, one day the guys who ran Area 51 just went: Uh, hey, guys. Everybody knows there's aliens in here,
"Maybe we should move them somewhere else."
Guy in a cage. Hold on a sec, Sir, I'll try to find a way to get you out.
"Hello, soldier, sir."
Hey, what are you doing? Hey! No! Woah, wow. You idiot!
Don't touch an electrified fence! I mean, the sign freakin' says 'High Voltage', right there!
And in case you can't read, there's lightning arcing between the cage and the generator!
You know, it's kind of hard to laugh at the stupidity of other if I keep getting shocked myself.
I've hurt the same arm too...where's the button for night vision? Ah, there we go.
Honestly, how dumb do you have to BE?
Anyone who's watched episodes of Pokemon knows the basic properties of electrical conduction...
This is the single worst idea I have ever had! What am I even doing in here? Wah!
Where is the *** off switch? I hope it's not outside the cage, and I've just walked past it.
Is that a Desert Eagle? Maybe I'll wait a second before taking it, I don't need yet another metal object on my person.
There we go!
That's what I'm talking about. I think that turned off the power by the crash site, too.
Okay, what have we got here? Oh, it's got a laser sight. That's pretty badass.
Huh. Maybe this guy still has a pulse...no, no, he's definitely dead.
I guess I don't need to check you for a pulse, you dumb ***.
***! I wish I could whistle.
Huh? What the hell is this? ACK! un, uhhh...
Uh! No! Get away from me! Jesus Christ, that burns.
I coulda been at a barbecue!
Okay, that's a lie. I never go to barbecues.
I'm not really sure why, I just never seem to enjoy myself.
I don't know! Nothing really happens... Oh, yes! Medical supplies!
And there's the radio. Okay, let's see if I remember how to do this.
Uh...this is Cpl. Adrian Shephard, calling...well, anyone at this point. Ronald McDonald, I don't care.
"Shephard, it's you! Listen, we've been cut up pretty bad, and orders are coming down to pull out!"
"Repeat: Pull out! Apparently they've got other plans for Black Mesa now."
"If you can make your way through the transit system youcan probably reach the surface, where we are pulling out! Good luck. Over."
We're pulling out already? How long was I unconscious? We left the base at noon, but it's like 5: 30 now.
Well, I guess it's time to haul *** to the extraction point. Might as well try this tunnel.
I hope I can get hope in time to watch the new episode of House tonight.