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I agree with the Muslim extremists. If their God does exist, then who am I blaspheme his
eternal greatness? Who am I to dare publically admit that I don’t believe Allah? Who on
this earth has the right to burn book which has words printed on its pages that are aligned
in such a manner as to express the very religious principles their God wanted them to believe?
So fervently do I agree with them that I feel any violation of sharia law should be punished
by death! I say it publically now before thousands of viewers that anyone who burns a qua-ran
deserves to die! The soot of those smoldering pages should serve as nothing less than a
premonition of the black funeral veils that should soon surround their very corpses.
I can think of no better punishment for such atrocities as apostasy than death itself.
Of course, if people leave their other religions go to Islam and are not killed for simply
doing so, that only makes sense. They weren’t worshipping the REAL god when they were Christians,
Jews, Hindus, and so forth anyway. And it in no way makes those other religions look
better, nor Islam look bad for punishing people with death for their natural skepticism getting
the best of them, because death is precisely what they deserve.
So Muslim extremists the world over- I say now that I agree with you full heartedly.
Infidel *** like myself, or revolting swine like any cartoonist who dares to depict a
man who said some things that got put committed to memory back in 632 AD and later put in
a book deserve nothing short of an agonizing halt of their very hearts. The only flaw,
my good-spirited Muslim extremist friends, is that logistically it’s just not possible
to kill off all the infidels, politically incorrect cartoonists, and desecrators of
your holy tomes. In the very interest of seeing that your deep
desires for a macabre solution to your offenses are satisfied, I suggest a new approach. For
attempting to manually behead or maul down these heathens on your own, from your dank
and isolated corners of the world is as effective as attempting to remove sand from the desert
one handful at a time. The only way I can see it practical for all of us to be met with
our just undoing is for you all to stop attempting to take such matters into your own hands.
I suggest that you all devout every ounce of your physical and spiritual energy into
praying to Allah to destroy us on his own. Not only is his limitless power the only way
to truly bring all us to justice for our unforgiveable offenses, but his own judgments are certainly
more pure and untainted by any human’s misinterpretation of holy text. So go forth! Drop your swords,
and lift your clasped hands. Never again bother with those barbaric and obsolete methods for
infidel annihilation. Just pray to Allah that he might bring destruction upon all those
who he feels deserve it. Let’s see how that works out.