Harry Potter Re-enacted by Ponies

Dear Dashie Potter, you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Friendship and Magic! You're a wizard Dashie! Uh, I mean. Only if you want to be, of course. Do you really have that scar? Holy sweet Celestiadore! Be warned my faithful students! The Everfree Forest is strictly forbidden and the 3rd floor corridor is out of bounds to any pony who does not wish to suffer a most painful death. Mr. Potter, our new celebrity. Troll! In the dungeon! Troll! In the dungeon! Thought you ought to know. Hagrid-shy! You've been illegally keeping a baby dragon in your home all this time?! Yes Hermioneigh, I have. And I'm sorry. But look at him! He's just so cute! According to this book, Nicholas Fla-Mare is the only known maker of the Horserer's Stone! Oh No! Voldemare must be trying to use it to regain his strength! Hello Dashie Potter. Prepare to meet your doom. Uh! Finally, I can breathe! You have no idea how dreadful it is back there. What the hay? Where was I? Oh! That's right. I was just about to kill Dashie Potter! Agh! The Friendship! IT BURNS!