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>> Welcome back, Internet people. My name is Ryan. We're playing Skyrim.
>> Picked a bad time to get lost, friend. >> Oh. Hello.
How's it going?
My name is N'wah-brotten.
What's your name?
Hello.
I'll just set you on fire. Oh god, there's lots of you.
Oh no.
Please don't hit me with things. I really don't appreciate it.
Like, we're talking like... I'm just not interested in getting hit.
Like, it hurts. It hurts a lot.
That's what you get.
That's what you get for being near me.
I'll set you on fire.
Is this where I'm supposed to be?
No, this place doesn't look like those ruins.
It must be further up the mountain.
Further up this hilariously snowy mountain. Oh, there it is.
There it is.
That is a place.
That is a majestic looking place.
So, bandits in here I'm guessing, or what?
Hello.
You're on fire. You should really get that checked out.
Hi.
These guys are really wimpy. I feel like a god with my fire hands.
Shooting stuff at them.
Hello.
Good thing I have such good aim.
I'll just take all of your stuff.
I can be sneaky.
>> ...that dark elf wants to go on ahead, let him.
Better than us- >> What was that?
>> Uh oh. Apparently I can't be sneaky.
Hi.
Don't mind me. I just shoot fire from my hands.
I found a torch in one of those boxes. Oh, spider webs.
Spider webs are not good.
Spider webs are decidedly bad.
I probably shouldn't do that.
I probably shouldn't disturb the resting place of things. It's not very nice.
It's kind of the most jerkface thing that you could possibly do, actually.
Other than chopping your head off
or someone else's head off as it were.
Linen wrap. Whoa. I've stumbled upon the motherlode here.
Oh, hello.
Hi.
Oh, you are not friendly. I just assumed because you were not concerned about the fact that
I was standing right behind you.
I'm just going to keep running backwards until you are dead.
Oh, I'm going to start running forwards. This is not going well for me.
There you go.
I will take your torch
for when mine is expired.
Oh, oh dear. Oh, that's not good. OK.
I really should've let him use that.
What is over here?
What if I need to get through?
They really should've thought of that. They really should've thought of N'wah-brotten
coming in here needing to get through this.
There must be a lever or something somewhere.
Can I change those ones up there?
Well if I make them like this then they match what's up there.
Nope.
Oh, this one must have fallen down from up there. OK.
Look at that.
I'm so clever. I can figure out everything.
A soul gem.
That might come in handy at some point.
Oh god. Hello.
Hi.
This is quite the cave.
Quite the cave, indeed.
>> ...but I need help...
>> You need help? Help is not to come,
Mr. Bandit.
How do I get past this?
Well I suppose if Ocarina of Time has taught me anything...
Beautiful.
Let's try with this scroll I just found.
Oh Christ almighty.
>> Don't let it get me! Help! >> Yeah, that's right.
>> Augh! Kill it! Kill it! >> Eee!
Oh, I am really poisoned right now.
>> Don't let it get me! Help!
>> You can't get me. I'm the best spellcaster in all of Skyrim!
I know a flame spell!
Take that venom.
Hello. >> You! Over here!
You did it. You killed it. Now cut me down before anything else shows up.
>> OK. Where's the golden claw.
>> Yes, the claw. I know how it works.
The claw, the markings, the door in the Hall of Stories, I know how they all fit together.
>> Do you? >> Help me down and I'll show you.
You won't believe the power the Nords have hidden there.
>> OK. I'll see if I can cut you down.
>> Sweet breath of Arkay, thank you.
>> Watch out, it's probably going to get a little warm.
>> You fool. Why should I share the treasure with anyone?
>> This is what you get. Don't be such an ***.
Take that golden claw.
Ooh, a journal. I love when evil people write down all of the things that they are doing
evilly so that I may peruse.
"That fool Lucan Valerius had no idea that his favourite store decoration was actually
the key to Bleak Falls Barrow. Now I just need to get to the Hall of Stories and unlock
the door. The legend says there is a test that the Nords put in place to keep the unworthy
away, but that 'When you have the golden claw, the solution is in the palm of your hands.'"
That sounds pretty simple.
Oh dear. What are you?
Why are you getting up?
Oh my god, you can also shoot magic from your hands.
This is not good. I don't know how to avoid the magic getting shot from people's hands.
And you are dead.
Well then.
That was only
mostly mortifying.
Oh my.
I saw one of you earlier.
Oh god, there's a whole bunch of you. What are you doing to me?
What are you doing to me?
Not a whole lot apparently except for be squishy.
I'll just take all of the things from your ancient rotting corpses.
Oh, look at that. Clever.
Seriously?
Ow. Ow.
Who thought that was a good idea?
"Oh yeah, let's just put swinging hammers in here.
That'll make it really easy to get in."
Hi.
Sorry to interrupt. I'm just here to steal your treasure or whatever.
Not 100% sure. I mostly just wandered in here.
I probably shouldn't be here.
I should probably just be hanging out somewhere boring and doing nothing at all.
That would be a lot safer for me.
You, wake up.
We're going to try something.
That worked quite well.
I'm pleased with the outcome of that.
Absolutely.
I feel like this cave is endless, or this barrow I suppose.
It's all very oddly put together, half cave, half ruin.
Hi.
How's it going?
Not that great? Me neither. All these undead things keep attacking me.
Do I want to go down here? I don't think I do.
I think this will be a place that I'll save for next time, Internet people.
Thanks for watching.