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Who were those people on the magazines?
In a prominent place by the entrance of the bookstore,
***-addicted celebrities.
In a corner near the back, dead novelists.
Triviality 1, culture 0
Hey, Blasco Ibáñez! One day I went to his house.
What do you think of Blasco Ibáñez?
The sooner they extend the avenue, the better.
It should also pass through Cabanyal, it's full of drugs and criminals...
No, no, I'm talking about the writer, not the avenue.
-We're just in front of his house. -Yeah, right; the writer.
You mean the republican freemason who wrote Cañas y Barro.
I'm in a bit of a hurry, excuse me.
Blasco Ibáñez is the symbol of Valencian power,
-...bourgeois and nepotistic. -Is that reflected in his works?
All works and demolitions have to stop.
Cabanyal is a living, unique quarter, full of beautiful houses which...
Wait, no, I'm asking about the writer, not the avenue.
Oh! The wealthy republican who wrote Cañas y Barro...
Yes.
THE FIFTH HORSEMAN OF THE APOCALYPSE.
This house we're seeing in front of the Malvarrosa Beach
was once one of the homes of Vicente Blasco Ibáñez, the Valencian writer.
Let's get to know where he did his writing and his horchata drinking.
Come with me.
Besides Cañas y Barro, Blasco Ibáñez wrote some 40 novels,
many of which have been adapted into cinema and TV movies.
The quarter of El Cabañal, in front of the Malvarrosa Beach,
is known for its art nouveau architectural style,
where ceramic tiling has the main role, all along with the building plots...
-Archie, look out!
Archie, are you all right?
The city hall leaves this cultural heritage quarter dilapidated
in exchange of extending with flashy brand-new buildings
the Blasco Ibáñez avenue up to the Malvarrosa Beach.
Triviality 2, culture 0
The quarter of El Cabanyal, due to its closeness to the beach,
was long ago the fishermen's quarter.
What's up?
Why are you stopping?
It's just that when I was a kid, I went fishing with my dad and...
No, no, Archie, please don't. No stories about some yanks fishing.
Go on.
Look! Over there!
Cultural diversity!
Why do you have to be so corny? Come back! Archie!
-What are they doing? -What do you care?
No!
***! My organic chemistry homework!
I have an exam on Thursday!
-So you weren't cooking drugs?
-Cooking drugs? Why?
Because we're gipsy? They'll never quit stereotyping us.
Please excuse us, he's a foreigner. He's from Boston.
I'm sorry, there's a lot of drugs in America and...
-We don't want any drugs! You idiot!
-Shut up or I'll break your soul!
That's from Lorca!
Look at her... She's my Dulcinea...
Dulcinea no, Archie. We're in Valencia.
If anything, it's Carmesina, not Dulcinea.
What?
Carmesina,
the object of Tirant lo Blanc's desire. From Joanot Martorell.
The first European modern novel.
But did Tirant end up being Carmesina's boyfriend?
Or is it just like the Don Quixote?
Of course.
He married her secretly. And he banged her, like four times.
Ah, look at her... She's my Marquesina...
A lawyer and journalist who lived in Argentina,
Chile and France, a successful writer...
Archie!
Don't touch anything! I know you pretty well!
A friend of Sorolla's...
Would Blasco Ibáñez and Sorolla get drunk together?
Did they ever binge drink at the Malvarrosa Beach?
-What are you doing?
-Signing the guestbook.
That's not a guestbook.
It's a first edition of Mare Nostrum. Are you stupid?
Stand back, stand back.
What's happened here?
I don't know, we were told to sign this book...
Why, those sons of...
I just wanted to indulge my ego
by effortlessly getting my name
into the house museum of a distinguished writer
But I ended *** up a novel's first edition.
Triviality 3, culture 0.
End of match.
"To Blasco Ibáñez, affectionately, you have a wonderful home. Archibald."
"Cañas y Barro" should have a remake with zombies and nazis.
Bargain: Penthouse, 130m Ocean view, 2min from beach (after prolongation)